Struggling with av it’s really going for it
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 453
It will pass. It feels awful, I know, but it will pass. I remember feeling like there was no way I could stay sober, but it was just thoughts.
Hang in there. Distract yourself. What's something you enjoy doing?
You'll feel positive again. It's normal to be on an emotional roller coaster at first. Ride out the emotions and they'll even out over time.
Fantastic that you're posting how you're feeling. Well done!
Best wishes to you!!
Hang in there. Distract yourself. What's something you enjoy doing?
You'll feel positive again. It's normal to be on an emotional roller coaster at first. Ride out the emotions and they'll even out over time.
Fantastic that you're posting how you're feeling. Well done!
Best wishes to you!!
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 453
I just saw your other post about triggers. It might be rough for you tonight since it's NYE (has it already happened? Not sure where you are) and standing up for yourself. That would put anybody on an emotional roller coaster, especially when you're new in sobriety.
I can't say enough how well you're doing. Please hang tight. Be kind to yourself. This will pass and in the morning you'll wake up feeling stronger.
Happy New Year's!
I can't say enough how well you're doing. Please hang tight. Be kind to yourself. This will pass and in the morning you'll wake up feeling stronger.
Happy New Year's!
Get insight timer on your phone and download some meditations. There are some short ones that deal with cravings. As soon as it hits put your headphones on and listen to one for 10 minutes. Cravings will pass, think of your AV as a toddler. It has always gotten it’s own way by throwing a tantrum, and to stop it screaming you give it what it wants. This toddler is being told ‘NO’ for the first time so it’s going to ramp up it’s crying, screaming and manipulating behaviour because that has always worked for it in the past. As with all toddlers if you say NO and mean it, don’t give in it will soon tire itself out and realise it’s not going to get it’s own way anymore. xx
Heres what to remember about the av - it powerless - really
it needs you and your arms and legs to get it what it wants - it can't go to the shop and buy booze, it can't open the bottle, it can't pour the booze down your throat.
If you refuse to cooperate, its beaten.
It will throw a tantrum, but like any toddler it will wear itself out eventually.
Don't engage with it - that just keeps it awake.
Have you used any of these tips before eve?
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...-cravings.html (CarolD's tips for cravings)
You can do this
D
it needs you and your arms and legs to get it what it wants - it can't go to the shop and buy booze, it can't open the bottle, it can't pour the booze down your throat.
If you refuse to cooperate, its beaten.
It will throw a tantrum, but like any toddler it will wear itself out eventually.
Don't engage with it - that just keeps it awake.
Have you used any of these tips before eve?
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...-cravings.html (CarolD's tips for cravings)
You can do this
D
Eve,
I agree. Even at my clean time the crave is there. Yesterday for about 15 minutes or so, a couple of times, I had this deep anxiety I wanted to drown w booze.
When it goes away, like it has since day 1, i felt normal and strong.
Addict for life.
Thanks.
I agree. Even at my clean time the crave is there. Yesterday for about 15 minutes or so, a couple of times, I had this deep anxiety I wanted to drown w booze.
When it goes away, like it has since day 1, i felt normal and strong.
Addict for life.
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 94
Thank you so much for this post, and an opportunity to relate and share experiences. Now that I know what AV is, I had a real strong one yesterday between 2-3 PM, which was my previous “let’s have a drink” time. That one drink would turn into one bottle.
This time to combat the cravings at around 2, I had a low sugar soda, came to this awesome site and read, started cooking (even though cooking is a trigger for me), and played a couple games with my wife and kids (really helped). All these things helped to separate my thinking from my cravings and after about 4 PM, the cravings were gone. I have been much more conscious about drinking in front of my kids. I used to try to hide it from them. That didn’t work either. Part of the trick yesterday was to engage with them through the games so that I knew if I was drinking , they would obviously know, which I don’t want them to see anymore.
I mentioned cooking is a trigger for me because I would cook and drink. Apparently my food came out really good, I just never remembered eating it! But this time I did other things while the food was cooking, which diverted my attention from the cravings I guess. I love cooking so I don’t want to give that up. I just have to train myself to disassociate cooking from drinking.
This time to combat the cravings at around 2, I had a low sugar soda, came to this awesome site and read, started cooking (even though cooking is a trigger for me), and played a couple games with my wife and kids (really helped). All these things helped to separate my thinking from my cravings and after about 4 PM, the cravings were gone. I have been much more conscious about drinking in front of my kids. I used to try to hide it from them. That didn’t work either. Part of the trick yesterday was to engage with them through the games so that I knew if I was drinking , they would obviously know, which I don’t want them to see anymore.
I mentioned cooking is a trigger for me because I would cook and drink. Apparently my food came out really good, I just never remembered eating it! But this time I did other things while the food was cooking, which diverted my attention from the cravings I guess. I love cooking so I don’t want to give that up. I just have to train myself to disassociate cooking from drinking.
I had thoughts of drinking early last evening - I felt something intensely physical would help short circuit the thoughts/cravings, so I did 10 push ups VERY slow, roughly 10 seconds down, 10 seconds up. That certainly did the trick to take my mind off the cravings and thoughts of drinking again! This certainly worked and will be added to my arsenal of recovery tools.
The more strategies you have to cope with difficult situations, the better prepared you will be.
You can do this!
The more strategies you have to cope with difficult situations, the better prepared you will be.
You can do this!
quat
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,819
Realizing wanting to drink and me drinking were not the same thing, breaking the casual link made the wanting irrelevant, annoying but irrelevant.
Breaking that link made the annoyance of the wanting lessen over time, and in less time than I thought.
AVRT( great threads here on SR in the Secular Recovery forum on these ideas) showed me how to live comfortably with residual desire.
Breaking that link made the annoyance of the wanting lessen over time, and in less time than I thought.
AVRT( great threads here on SR in the Secular Recovery forum on these ideas) showed me how to live comfortably with residual desire.
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