Cobber3

Fist off, I have thought about this exact moment for a year now. I distinctly remember being on here with several days under my belt, promising to myself that i would be writing an update with a year under my belt. I hit 365 last Wednesday and I have to say its one of the biggest accomplishments of my life without question. If you were to play a movie of my life a little over a year ago and me today, you wouldn't even recognize it was the same character. I literally am absolutely baffled at how much a year without drowning myself in budlight, can change your life for the positive. I wanted to post for two reasons, 1, to talk to anyone who was where i have been over this last year, as that gave me comfort when i was there. And 2, get advice from wiser owls with more knowledge on where to go from here.


1,
I can say to anyone that has 1 day, 1 week, 1 month, hell 1 hour. It is a choice you simply will not regret, not matter how you look at it. There may be temporary moments when everyone is tying one on and you feel left out, but that moment WILL PASS and you will reap all the benefits of your new life. There is definitely an ebb and flow to the first year that i saw others lay out on SR that helped me keep the faith. Peaks, valleys, PAWS, hell just not having that buffer there to numb the pain. I went through multiple weird weeks of almost depression of some sort, and anxiety would pop up here and there, the list goes on. One thing that i continuously saw on SR was that IT WILL PASS! So easy to say and yet when you are living it, i am sure you look at the screen and say "ya F*** you buddy", i have been there. I forget who told me along my journey, but they hit the nail on the head. They told me, I wasn't special, (my mom thinks differently though), but they were absolutely right. I started to realize, when i would talk to people with more time then me, and tell them about all these anxiety feelings, depressions bouts, mood swings, feelings of bliss, feeling my emotions again.... I AM NOT special. Its a process that if you stick with it, a lot of people experience the same thing. And to me, thats the beauty of sharing our experiences with each other. For me, anxiety was and still is the new beauty i get to deal with without booze. BUT, logging on here and writing my problem down word for word and having multiple complete strangers reiterate that they have experienced or gone through the exact same thing, that kept me sane and motivated to keep fighting on. My point is this, and I can say with 100% certainty that I have never claimed anything with 100% certainty in my life, but, if you stick with it, keep your eye on the ball, your life is going to dramatically change for the better. Now, with that being said, what i am begging to realize, is that doesn't mean, boom your sober and life is awesome and all your problems go away. It gives you the power to choose your problems and not have everything spin out control. And for me, that is a dramatic change that has had a tremendous trickle down effect over a year. Sorry if i have rambled (been thinking about this one for a year, remember). I hope that that maybe resinated with some that needed a little bit of something to keep going. I don't know, but i know i got all of your backs!!!!!!

2,
Now on to the wise owls with more time than me. Obviously, as i know you are aware, one year was the holy grail and now that has come and gone. I am starting to pay attention to new things that i didn't quit master this year and wanted some advice. Things like diet for instance. Anyone think that years of drinking our calories has messed up the way we learned to eat? I think i may still be eating like i was when i was drinking and starting to suspect that is playing a major role with my moods. I know "you are what you eat".... apparently i am pepperoni pizza. Seriously though, i feel when i eat well, i am on it, and when i am not, there is definitely a heavy correlation to my anxiety and just moodiness. Anyone relate? Also, i know this is going to sound stupid... but does it just keep getting better from here? I feel leaps and bounds of where i was a year ago, but as a human, i am waiting for the plateau. I appreciate you all.

Last but not least, I just want to thank everyone who has taken a moment out of their day to write back to some rant or question i have posted. Multiple times, just seeing someone else could relate to my experience did more for me than i thought it ever could and i am truly grateful for you all and SR. I hope you all have a great week!

PEACE!!!
-James

Free2bme888

Hi James!

What a great post!!

So authentic and from the heart

I’m getting help from peeps here too, never thought I’d make six months, it’s less than 48 hours away for me.

I have no wise words of wisdom, I’m an ‘undie’ ( under one year), but resonate your story as well. Mind up and down. Body up and down. Ugh. Hoping it evens out. Seems to me the waters are calming for me, and yes, believe I’m better prepared for storms when they come.

Congratulations on your whole year, it’s so fantastic

Thank you,

kiki26

Helianthus

Congratulations Cobber3 and thanks for posting, one year is amazing you should be so proud of yourself!

Delilah1

Congratulations on one year James!!! It is a very big milestone, and the sense of accomplishment that comes with it is pretty darn amazing.

I can tell you things keep getting better. I am about a month away from three years, and I feel like I'm in a good rhythm. For me some of the important things have been to continue to read and post here daily, it helps keep me ground d in recovery. Mindfulness has been great for my anxiety. Also, exercise, especially going for walks and being out in nature is a part of my daily routine.

I lost weight when I got sober, probably because I wasn't drinking ridiculous empty calories and eating late at night. However, pizza is still one of my staples, in fact, I think it may be the perfect food group!!

Cobber3

Cobber3

Cobber3

Lpg

Well done on one year cobber, and thanks for your post was a lovely read.

I too am 1 year on the 11th of november and. I hope I never pick up an alcoholic drink again. Cant wait to see what the next year brings, iv decided year 2 is to get productive. Im abit of a sayer and not a doer so time to change that. Iv always wanted to be a dancer too so making plans to join classes.

congratulations again its the best feeling

ChloeRose63

Congrats and thanks for the great post!

MantaLady

1 year is fantastic cobbler!

Even though I am only at just under 6 months I can relate to the food affecting moods etc. I have totally changed my diet and feel so much better for it. Poor food choices have been linked to depression and low mood. I now have a couple of raw juices a day to get extra nutrients in my body for a bit of a boost. I don’t eat any processed food, high saturated fat or excess sugar. Plenty of veg, 3 meals a day at the same time and make sure I plan the food for the week ahead so I get a varied amount of different foods. If I don’t eat well I do find I start feeling down more often and moody or short tempered. I am not on any kind of crazy diet I just eat balanced healthy meals and have also lost 20lbs as a result. Good food paired with daily exercise even if that is just a 20 minute walk is something that I can’t do without and I feel it’s so important and has a huge impact on your quality of life.

Thanks for the inspiring post and keep up the good fight! xx

bexxed

I love this post. Congratulations.

I don’t know how wise I am, but I remember thinking the question you’re asking when I hit a year. You just keep doing the same things, and you keep having the same things happen - being alive. It ebbs and flows. I think when you’ve been to hell, staying away from it just keeps getting more awesome.

I go for long walks, it helps me from being a pepperoni pizza, or, a plate of soggy microwaved nachos....I could lie and say I’ve become a big bowl of yogurt and steamed kale but I think I’m going to find I’m a little more interesting than that.

Thanks for this,

bexxed

August252015

Awesome job!!!

And as far as the 1 yr - interestingly, I felt 13 mo was the bigger deal

And as far as your #2 question....I have found each year different. I just hit 2 yr 9 mo (on 11/21) and definitely find things like eating a work in progress! At one point earlier this year, I swear I did a Step One on frozen yogurt. For real. I started getting anxious about having enough in the freezer.....like I once did about vodka. That addict mind, you know. Sleeping has been an up and down struggle as well and at a couple points along the way I can say I have specifically dealt with depression. My lifelong anxiety is something identified once I got sober and with which I am better equipped to deal with, in diff ways.

Each year- month, even days even!!- has brought more clarity. And life challenges. And ability to handle them- as ROUGH as some have been. Or, are, right now, with a step-daughter who has refused to attend our one year anniversary party (everyone thinks it is our wedding, but we got married at the courthouse last Dec 1) bc "I cannot accept your relationship bc [Dad] has changed and it's because of [you]." That was fun hearing on speaker last week. This after 2+ years together and her living with us for almost a year....you get the point - SOBER, I have a shot at dealing with this best I - we- can.

It is absolutely worth the journey and I have EVERYTHING good in my life because I got sober. Life is hard for alcoholics and non alcoholics alike, but this alcoholic's life (i am an AAer so, this alcoholic's program) of recovery first both saved my life and has given me one.

Keep going, James - and everyone, wherever you are in your sober journey!

FBL

James, HUGE congrats on 1 year sober!

I'm now nearing 9 1/2 years of recovery. Every subsequent year has been better than the last. Alcoholism is progressive, but so is recovery! I feel that life is a journey and therefore, I will always be working on one aspect or another. The peace of mind I've found has been the biggest thrill for me.

PalmerSage

Awesome post, James! I am just a few weeks short of one year myself, and I couldn't agree more with everything you said. As far as diet goes, I ate whatever I wanted (and then some!) for the first 6 months, and in the past 5-6 months I've lost almost 30 pounds through watching my calories and walking a ton. I still eat pizza (American Flatbread is my favorite, pretty low-calorie too, actually!) and lots of sweets, so maybe I'll focus on that next year. Or, maybe I won't. I love that people are saying it keeps getting better every year...thanks so much for this post.

2ndhandrose

What a fantastic post and accomplishment, James! Congratulations!

"I feel leaps and bounds of where i was a year ago, but as a human, i am waiting for the plateau."

I am coming up to 4 years and I would just like to say, YES, it does get better and, also yes, there will be plateaus. But if you keep going, it will keep going

I focus on never being complacent about my hard won sobriety, even in the down times, the stagnant times, because those times happen.

Real life rocks!!!!!!!!

least

Congrats on the first of many sober years!

tekink

thomas11

That was fun to read, you are a gifted writer in your own way. So much truth to what you say. What struck me is that life still has its bumps but being sober we don't ignore them, we face them head on and solve them.

Anna

That's a great accomplishment and I'm glad you're proud of yourself.