Daily Readings for Saturday, November 10
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Daily Readings for Saturday, November 10
Daily Reflections
A SENSE OF BELONGING
Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is the sense of belonging
that comes to us.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105
That's what it is -- belonging! After a session of meditation I knew that the feeling I was
experiencing was a sense of belonging because I was so relaxed. I felt quieter inside,
more willing to discard little irritations. I appreciated my sense of humor. What I also
experience in my daily practice is the sheer pleasure of belonging to the creative flow of
God's world. How propitious for us that prayer and meditation are written right into our
A.A. way of life.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I am less self centered. The world used to revolve around me at the center. I cared more
about myself, my own needs and desires, my own pleasure, my own way, than I did about
the whole rest of the world. What happened to me was more important than anything else
I could think of. I was selfishly trying to be happy and therefore I was unhappy most of
the time. I have found that selfishly seeking pleasure does not bring true happiness.
Thinking of myself all the time cut me off from the best in life. A.A. taught me to care less
about myself and more about the other fellow. Am I less self-centered?
Meditation For The Day
When something happens to upset you and you are discouraged, try to feel that life's
difficulties and troubles are not intended to arrest your progress in the spiritual life, but to
test your strength and increase your determination to keep going. Whatever it is that must
be met, you are to either overcome it or use it. Nothing should daunt you for long, nor
should any difficulty overcome or conquer you. God's strength will always be there,
waiting for you to use it. Nothing can be too great to be overcome, or if not overcome,
then used.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may know that there can be no failure with God.
I pray that with His help I may live a more victorious life.
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As Bill Sees It
Tolerance Keeps Us Sober, p. 312
"Honesty with ourselves and others gets us sober, but it is tolerance
that keeps us that way.
"Experience shows that few alcoholics will long stay away from a
group just because they don't like the way it is run. Most return and
adjust themselves to whatever conditions they must. Some go to a
different group, or form a new one.
"In other words, once an alcoholic fully realizes that he cannot get
well alone, he will somehow find a way to get well and stay well in the
company of others. It has been that way from the beginning of A.A.
and probably always will be so."
Letter, 1943
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Walk In Dry Places
Honesty with another person
Admitting wrongs.
A good fifth Step in the program means being entirely hones with at least one person about the nature of our shortcomings. "A burden shared is a burden cut in half" is the principle behind this action.
We can feel relieved that the 12 Step program specifically limits this sharing to "another person"___ though we can obviously add to that if we choose. However, we must be sure to share honestly with that one person, being careful not to gloss over this important Step.
What is the result of this honest sharing? At the very least, it helps us lose the fear that people might know us as we really are. It helps us face the world with confidence and perhaps new humility. Morever, it can strengthen our ability to stay sober. All these gains are certainly reward enough.
If I haven't been honest with at least one other person, I'll reread the Fifth Step today. This is something that should be done for my own future safety and well-being.
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Keep It Simple
Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.---Will Rogers
The greatest adventure ever is recovery, and action is what’s important in recovery. That’s because the Twelve Steps are full of action. The whole world has now opened up to us. At times, this will scare us. But we aren’t alone. Our Higher Power is there to help us. All we have to ask ourselves is, “Would this action keep me in touch with my Higher Power?” If the answer is yes, then we take action. If the answer is no, then we don’t.
In recovery, we’ll be busy. We admit our wrongs. We take inventories. We seek answers. We ask for help. We are to get as much as we can out of life. We can’t sit and watch; we have to get out and live life.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You gave me a second chance at life. Help me use it and not let my fear stop.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll five things I want to do but I’m afraid to try. I’ll talk to someone I trust about how I can do these things.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Because society would rather we always wore a pretty face, women have been trained to cut off anger. --Nancy Friday
Anger is an emotion. Not a bad one, nor a good one; it simply exists when particular conditions in our lives are not met as we'd hoped.
We can get free of our anger if we choose to take action appropriate to it. Anger can be a healthy prompter of action. But when no action is taken, anger turns inward, negatively influencing our perceptions of all experiences, all human interaction.
We need to befriend all of our emotions. We need to trust that they all can serve us when we befriend them, learn from them, act in healthy concert with them. Our emotions reveal the many faces of our soul. And all are valid, deserving respect and acceptance. They are all representative of the inner self.
Because we are less at home with anger, it becomes more powerful. When we deny it, it doesn't disappear. It surfaces in unrelated circumstances, complicating our lives in unnecessary ways. We can learn to enjoy our anger by celebrating the positive action it prompts. We can cherish the growth that accompanies it, when we take the steps we need to.
It's okay for me to be angry today. It's growthful, if I use it for good.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 10 - To Employers
After your man has gone along without drinking for a few months, you may be able to make use of his services with other employees who are giving you the alcoholic run-around—provided, of course, they are willing to have a third party in the picture. An alcoholic who has recovered, but holds a relatively unimportant job, can talk to a man with a better position. Being on a radically different basis of life, he will never take advantage of the situation.
p. 146
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Because I'm An Alcoholic
This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?"
Alcohol helped. At least I thought it helped until I saw the oppressive thirty-year shadow it cast on my life. I discovered it in college, and although at first I didn't drink often (didn't have the opportunity), whenever I started, I drank as long as there was any alcohol around. It was a reflex. I don't remember liking the taste, but I liked that it seemed to bring me to life and get me through a date or party able to talk. It moved me outside of that hole I felt in myself and lowered the wall I created between me and any person or situation that made me uncomfortable.
p. 338
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Eight - "Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all."
This is a very large order. It is a task which we may perform with increasing skill, but never really finish. Learning how to live in the greatest peace, partnership, and brotherhood with all men and women, of whatever description, is a moving and fascinating adventure. Every A.A. has found that he can make little headway in this new adventure of living until he first backtracks and really makes an accurate and unsparing survey of the human wreckage he has left in his wake. To a degree, he has already done this when taking moral inventory, but now the time has come when he ought to redouble his efforts to see how many people he has hurt, and in what ways. This reopening of emotional wounds, some old, some perhaps forgotten, and some still painfully festering, will at first look like a purposeless and pointless piece of surgery. But if a willing start is made, then the great advantages of doing this will so quickly reveal themselves that the pain will be lessened as one obstacle after another melts away.
pp. 77-78
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God is the source of all I need, and all others need.
--Shelley
"Call on God, but row away from the rocks."
--Indian proverb
"If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it."
--Mary Engelbreit
"Responsible persons are mature people who have taken charge of themselves and their
conduct, who own their actions and own up to them--who answer for them."
--William J. Bennett
"Silence fertilizes the deep place where personality grows. A life with a peaceful center can weather all storms."
--Norman Vincent Peale
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FAITH
"Faith is never identical with piety."
-- Karl Barth
Drugs make us artificial and unreal. They create a world of fantasy, rather than reality
and teach us how to escape rather than live. Everything is exaggerated and dehumanized
especially the practice of our religion. Often for the addict, religion becomes part of the
escape, a ritual that becomes exaggerated and theatrical, expecting magic rather than
miracle.
Madonnas are kissed, promises are made, confessions become routine, prayers are
mouthed and God is manipulated with the disease. Piety, the religious art of
showmanship, keeps us a prisoner of the small "god".
Faith takes seriously our pain and isolation and promises recovery only with change and
accepted responsibility. We must walk our prayers and live our rosary!
O God, build Your temple in my heart and Your altar in my daily sacrifice of love to self
and others.
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“I say this because I know what I am planning for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give
you hope and a good future. Then you will call my name. You will come to me and pray to
me, and I will listen to you. You will search for me. And when you search for me with all
your heart, you will find me.”
Jeremiah 29:11-13
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding..."
Proverbs 3:5
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Daily Inspiration
Study who you are and follow your heart because it will often lead you to miracles. Lord, in knowing who I am, I will become better able to know and serve You.
There is light behind every shadow. Lord, You are the light of the world. May I never forget to turn to You when my life fills with shadows.
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NA Just For Today
Fear or faith?
"No matter how far we ran, we always carried fear with us."
Basic Text, p. 14
For many of us, fear was a constant factor in our lives before we came to Narcotics Anonymous. We used because we were afraid to feel emotional or physical pain. Our fear of people and situations gave us a convenient excuse to use drugs. A few of us were so afraid of everything that we were unable even to leave our homes without using first.
As we stay clean, we replace our fear with a belief in the fellowship, the steps, and a Higher Power. As this belief grows, our faith in the miracle of recovery begins to color all aspects of our lives. We start to see ourselves differently. We realize we are spiritual beings, and we strive to live by spiritual principles.
The application of spiritual principles helps eliminate fear from our lives. By refraining from treating other people in harmful or unlawful ways, we find we needn't fear how we will be treated in return. As we practice love, compassion, understanding, and patience in our relationships with others, we are treated in turn with respect and consideration. We realize these positive changes result from allowing our Higher Power to work through us. We come to believe-not to think, but to believe-that our Higher Power wants only the best for us. No matter what the circumstances, we find we can walk in faith instead of fear.
Just for Today: I no longer need to run in fear, but can walk in faith that my Higher Power has only the best in store for me.
Page 328
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
He who has courage and faith will never perish in misery! --Anne Frank
Someone once said happiness is like a butterfly: if we chase it, we'll never find it. But if we sit quietly, it will come and land on us. Faith and courage are the same. All we have to do is sit quietly and ask for these gifts from God. In time, and with patience, they will be ours, and so will the happiness we can then pass on to others.
Anne Frank wrote the above words facing a concentration camp and certain death. If she could find happiness and faith and courage within herself under those circumstances, then certainly we can too. These gifts are ours, already within us, if we but look for them.
What can I ask for today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Humility is just as much the opposite of self-abasement as it is of self-exaltation. --Dag Hammarskjold
In our struggles with self-hate and guilt, we may have thought we were humble - or perhaps even too humble. But self-abasement, which often alternates with feelings of superiority, is not the spiritual quality of humility that we strive for in our program.
With humility, we respect ourselves and our place in the universe. Humility is having ourselves in perspective, knowing we are connected to the whole world, accepting how small and powerless we are, and accepting the power and responsibility we have. With this spiritual feeling comes a sense of awe for the world we live in and a feeling of gratitude for the life we've been given.
The humility I feel today goes hand in hand with my self-respect and gratefulness for being part of life.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Because society would rather we always wore a pretty face, women have been trained to cut off anger. --Nancy Friday
Anger is an emotion. Not a bad one, nor a good one; it simply exists when particular conditions in our lives are not met as we'd hoped.
We can get free of our anger if we choose to take action appropriate to it. Anger can be a healthy prompter of action. But when no action is taken, anger turns inward, negatively influencing our perceptions of all experiences, all human interaction.
We need to befriend all of our emotions. We need to trust that they all can serve us when we befriend them, learn from them, act in healthy concert with them. Our emotions reveal the many faces of our soul. And all are valid, deserving respect and acceptance. They are all representative of the inner self.
Because we are less at home with anger, it becomes more powerful. When we deny it, it doesn't disappear. It surfaces in unrelated circumstances, complicating our lives in unnecessary ways. We can learn to enjoy our anger by celebrating the positive action it prompts. We can cherish the growth that accompanies it, when we take the steps we need to.
It's okay for me to be angry today. It's growthful, if I use it for good.
You are reading from the book Food for Thought.
Plan Plans, Not Results
Understanding that we do not have the power to control the results of our plans is an important step toward accepting reality. We do make plans, based on the information, experience, and insight which we have available to us. The outcome of our plans, however, is dependent on circumstances, which are frequently beyond our control.
When we accept the fact that the results of our plans are always in the hands of our Higher Power, we can relax and leave the outcome to Him. When we do not insist compulsively that life go according to our design, we are able to avoid the inevitable frustration produced by such an unrealistic attitude. However good our intentions, our designs are always finite and based on limited knowledge. We need to trust a Power greater than ourselves.
Our idea of what is best for ourselves and those we love may not always be right, according to God's will. The faith that He will carry out His design for us, even when we do not understand it, relieves us of much anxiety and frustration.
I leave results to You.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Beliefs about Money
I was starting a new job for a corporation. I was good at what I did for a living. The personnel manager and I were down to the details of employment, and he asked me how much money I believed I deserved. I thought about it and came up with a figure of $400 a month. This was back in the sixties. I didn't want to ask for too much, so I decided to ask for the smallest amount I could live with. He hired me and gave me what I asked for. Later on, when I left that job, the personnel manager told me he had been willing to pay me whatever I wanted. Had I asked for $600 or even $700 a month, which was a tremendous salary at that time, I would have gotten it. I had limited myself by what I believed I deserved. --Anonymous
What are our beliefs about money?
In moments of stress, doubt, uncertainty, anger or pain, I can pause and say the serenity prayer, knowing that I will get all the strength, courage and wisdom that I need. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Release Guilt
Do whatever you need to do to release guilt. Do it often. Make that technique a regular part of your life.
Guilt has gotten a bad name. Many of us insist that we won’t feel guilt ever again, because we felt so much before, because it serves no purpose. Maybe we need to rethink guilt.
Guilt is a feeling. If it’s there and you don’t feel it, honor it, release it, it will block and stop you. It will control your energy and possibly control your life like anything else that’s denied and repressed. Acknowledging guilt won’t make it more real. Acknowledging guilt won’t lead to condemnation. Acknowledging guilt will help you release it. Write it out. Talk it out. Use a ritual from your church. Let yourself know your secrets, even the ones you’ve kept hidden from yourself until now.
Choose a way to express your guilt. Then watch it loosen and leave. That’s how we cleanse our souls.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Find a way to say I can
Slowly I began to see that many of the boxes I found myself in were of my own making. I tended to construct them, crawl in, then wonder who I could blame for putting me there. Who did this to me? I would wonder and sometimes ask aloud. That’s when I’d hear the answer. You did, Melody. You put yourself in this box. Now it’s up to you to get out.
–Melody Beattie, Stop Being Mean to Yourself
Each of us has our own degree of freedom. We have certain things we can do and certain things we can’t. Sometimes this freedom fluctuates at different times in our lives. Sometimes we are bound by our responsibilities to other people. Sometimes we have financial limitations. Sometimes we’re limited by what our body can or cannot do at any given point in time.
Alcoholics who know they cannot drink because they lose control when they do are people who are in touch with their power. They can’t drink, but they get to have a manageable life instead.
Healthy happy people know and recognize what they can do and what they truly can’t– at least not without unwanted repercussions. But sometimes we put too many limitations on ourselves. We look around. Because we’re so used to accepting our limitations, we automatically tell ourselves, I can’t do that, so I can’t do anything else.
I’ve been to the house, touched the rock collection, of the author George Sands who lived in southern France years and years ago during a time when women had few rights. It turned out that George was really a woman who took on a man’s name so she could write and sell her books. Her legend and her books still live on.
Identify what you legitimately can’t do or what you’d be better off and more powerful if you didn’t. Learn to live within those limitations. That’s how you’ll own your power.
But don’t stop there. Look around and see what you can do, too. Be creative. Knowing what we truly can’t do is often a stepping stone to discovering what we can do.
God, help me own my power by surrendering to what I can’t do. Then help me own my power some more by discovering what I can.
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Light of the Party
Confidence in Social Situations
If you’ve ever been to a social gathering where you’ve felt awkward and uncomfortable, chances are you are not alone. While social gatherings can be very enjoyable, especially when we are surrounded by people whose company we enjoy, there are social events that we attend where we sometimes find ourselves wishing we were someplace else. Such occasions can sometimes be the cause of much anxiety and self-consciousness. We may even feel like everyone else is having a good time except for us. Yet the truth is that everyone has felt shy and awkward on occasion. One of the best ways to overcome self-consciousness or get past your feelings of shyness at social gatherings is to focus on the people around you. If you can remember that other people might also be feeling awkward or shy, you might find the thought of speaking to them less intimidating or overwhelming.
The next time there is a social event you feel nervous about attending, you may want to try this exercise: Spend some time with your eyes closed and breathe deeply. When you feel ready, create your own zone of comfort by visualizing yourself surrounded in a warm white light that is protective yet accepting of others. Imagine people at the event being drawn to you because of the open and warm feelings that you are radiating. When you arrive at the event, take a moment to spread this same light of loving acceptance to everyone around you. Smile and greet people warmly. Try going up to someone who is standing alone and introduce yourself. When you radiate acceptance, openness, and receptivity, people can’t help but respond to you in kind.
Focusing on how we can make other people at a social gathering feel at ease can help us forget about our own insecurities. In the process, we end up making the very connections that we seek. The next time you attend a social gathering, invite people to join you in your zone of comfort that you have so lovingly and intentionally created. Let yourself enjoy being encircled in the warmth of their friendships. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When I first came to The Program, I thought that humility was just another word for weakness. But I gradually learned that there’s nothing incompatible between humility and intellect, just as long as I place humility first. As soon as I began to do that, I was told, I would receive the gift of faith — a faith which would work for me as it has worked and continues to work for countless others who have been freed of their addictions and have found a new way of life in The Program. Have I come to believe, in the words of Heine, that “The actions of men are like the index of a book; they point out what is most remarkable in them…”?
Today I Pray
May I never let my intelligence be an excuse for lack of humility. It is so easy, if I consider myself reasonably bright and capable of making decisions and handling my own affairs, to look down upon humility as a property of those less intelligent. May I remember that intelligence and humility are both God-given.
Today I Will Remember
If I have no humility, I have no intelligence.
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One More Day
It is easier to confess a defect than to claim a quality.
– Max Beerbohm
It is easy to simply admit our character defects — and then do nothing about them. The difficult part is asking God — however we picture God — to remove our defects and then live with the choices we have made.
We may have apologized to friends, and then added, “but I’ve always been that way.” Or, “I just can’t seem to help it.” We might have used such excuses to avoid looking honestly at ourselves. When we sincerely examine our character defects and have the desire to change, our confessions to others no longer are made with excuses. Instead, we admit our flaws, ask our Higher Power to remove them, and then take responsibility for working toward qualities we admire.
My defects can be changed once I admit them and begin to work on eliminating them.
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Food For Thought
Plan Plans, Not Results
Understanding that we do not have the power to control the results of our plans is an important step toward accepting reality. We do make plans, based on the information, experience, and insight which we have available to us. The outcome of our plans, however, is dependent on circumstances, which are frequently beyond our control.
When we accept the fact that the results of our plans are always in the hands of our Higher Power, we can relax and leave the outcome to Him. When we do not insist compulsively that life go according to our design, we are able to avoid the inevitable frustration produced by such an unrealistic attitude. However good our intentions, our designs are always finite and based on limited knowledge. We need to trust a Power greater than ourselves.
Our idea of what is best for ourselves and those we love may not always be right, according to God's will. The faith that He will carry out His design for us, even when we do not understand it, relieves us of much anxiety and frustration.
I leave results to You.
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One Day At A Time
~ SELF-WILL ~
Our whole trouble has been the misuse of willpower.
We had tried to bombard our problems with it
instead of attempting to bring it into agreement with God's intention for us.
The AA Twelve and Twelve
I want the answers to all my questions and the solutions to all of my problems RIGHT NOW. Furthermore, I want to tell my Higher Power what I want those answers and solutions to be. I think I know what's best for me and what will bring long-lasting peace and serenity to my life.
My self-will has gotten me hurt and possibly caused me to hurt others. It has convinced me I could do things my way and everything would be just fine. My self-will has helped me lie to myself about my disease of compulsive overeating, anorexia, or bulimia; it has convinced me that darkness was light and that I should have what I want exactly when I want it.
How grateful I am that my Higher Power loves me enough to not take my advice! How grateful I am that, after I've plunged head-first into the same wall at least one hundred times as I tried to force my own answers and solutions, my Higher Power is waiting patiently to bless me by leading me where He would have me go. How grateful I am that I don't have to run into the wall of my self-will as often or as hard as I once did. One day, maybe I won't run into it at all.
One Day at a Time . . .
I can let go of self-will and remember that the Third Step says we "made a decision to turn our will and our lives over the the care of God as we understood Him." The care of God ... God can take better care of me than I can of myself.
~ Sandee ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If a person has cancer all are sorry for him and no one is angry or hurt. But not so with the alcoholic illness, for with it there goes annihilation of all things worth while in life. It engulfs all whose lives touch the sufferer's. It brings misunderstanding, fierce resentment, financial insecurity, disgusted friends and employers, warped lives of blameless children, sad wives and parents - anyone can increase the list. - Pg. 18 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Doubts can be a good thing. It shows we're still thinking. Of course we doubt the wisdom of taking steps, going to meetings, and practicing spiritual principles to arrest this deadly disease of addiction. Even Thomas doubted his path with Jesus, but given time, he saw the wisdom of the spiritual path. His doubts were allayed.
May my doubts, like Thomas's fade away in time, as I observe the miracles in myself and others.
Higher Power Within Me
Today, I recognize that a Higher Power lives and breathes inside me, through me, as me. I used to think that God was the chairperson of somebody else's board, and I spent my time in search of another person's version of a Higher Power. But really, there is no searching - it is more like an acceptance. That is the well-kept secret: that God lives, not in the heavens or inside special buildings, but within my very self. My direct access to myself is my direct access to my Higher Power, and my estrangement from myself is my estrangement from my Higher Power. We are co-creators, hand-in-glove, a team. Today, I see allowing God into my life as an act of surrender, acceptance and love.I love my Higher Power and my Higher Power loves me - we are one.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Not knowing, is not the problem. Not being OK with not knowing is the problem.
I don't need to figure it out. I just need to do it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Don't let your reality check bounce.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
In moments of stress, doubt, uncertainty, anger or pain, I can pause and say the serenity prayer, knowing that I will get all the strength, courage and wisdom that I need.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
If alcoholism is a three-fold disease; mental, physical - and the mental and physical mix together and create a soul sickness - and psycho therapy is mental, which is one-fold. I'd be trying to treat a three-fold illness with one fold, which would leave me two fold short. Which would explain why I felt like I was bringing a knife to a gunfight my whole life. - Scott R.
__________________
A SENSE OF BELONGING
Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is the sense of belonging
that comes to us.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105
That's what it is -- belonging! After a session of meditation I knew that the feeling I was
experiencing was a sense of belonging because I was so relaxed. I felt quieter inside,
more willing to discard little irritations. I appreciated my sense of humor. What I also
experience in my daily practice is the sheer pleasure of belonging to the creative flow of
God's world. How propitious for us that prayer and meditation are written right into our
A.A. way of life.
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Twenty-Four Hours A Day
A.A. Thought For The Day
I am less self centered. The world used to revolve around me at the center. I cared more
about myself, my own needs and desires, my own pleasure, my own way, than I did about
the whole rest of the world. What happened to me was more important than anything else
I could think of. I was selfishly trying to be happy and therefore I was unhappy most of
the time. I have found that selfishly seeking pleasure does not bring true happiness.
Thinking of myself all the time cut me off from the best in life. A.A. taught me to care less
about myself and more about the other fellow. Am I less self-centered?
Meditation For The Day
When something happens to upset you and you are discouraged, try to feel that life's
difficulties and troubles are not intended to arrest your progress in the spiritual life, but to
test your strength and increase your determination to keep going. Whatever it is that must
be met, you are to either overcome it or use it. Nothing should daunt you for long, nor
should any difficulty overcome or conquer you. God's strength will always be there,
waiting for you to use it. Nothing can be too great to be overcome, or if not overcome,
then used.
Prayer For The Day
I pray that I may know that there can be no failure with God.
I pray that with His help I may live a more victorious life.
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As Bill Sees It
Tolerance Keeps Us Sober, p. 312
"Honesty with ourselves and others gets us sober, but it is tolerance
that keeps us that way.
"Experience shows that few alcoholics will long stay away from a
group just because they don't like the way it is run. Most return and
adjust themselves to whatever conditions they must. Some go to a
different group, or form a new one.
"In other words, once an alcoholic fully realizes that he cannot get
well alone, he will somehow find a way to get well and stay well in the
company of others. It has been that way from the beginning of A.A.
and probably always will be so."
Letter, 1943
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Walk In Dry Places
Honesty with another person
Admitting wrongs.
A good fifth Step in the program means being entirely hones with at least one person about the nature of our shortcomings. "A burden shared is a burden cut in half" is the principle behind this action.
We can feel relieved that the 12 Step program specifically limits this sharing to "another person"___ though we can obviously add to that if we choose. However, we must be sure to share honestly with that one person, being careful not to gloss over this important Step.
What is the result of this honest sharing? At the very least, it helps us lose the fear that people might know us as we really are. It helps us face the world with confidence and perhaps new humility. Morever, it can strengthen our ability to stay sober. All these gains are certainly reward enough.
If I haven't been honest with at least one other person, I'll reread the Fifth Step today. This is something that should be done for my own future safety and well-being.
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Keep It Simple
Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.---Will Rogers
The greatest adventure ever is recovery, and action is what’s important in recovery. That’s because the Twelve Steps are full of action. The whole world has now opened up to us. At times, this will scare us. But we aren’t alone. Our Higher Power is there to help us. All we have to ask ourselves is, “Would this action keep me in touch with my Higher Power?” If the answer is yes, then we take action. If the answer is no, then we don’t.
In recovery, we’ll be busy. We admit our wrongs. We take inventories. We seek answers. We ask for help. We are to get as much as we can out of life. We can’t sit and watch; we have to get out and live life.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You gave me a second chance at life. Help me use it and not let my fear stop.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll five things I want to do but I’m afraid to try. I’ll talk to someone I trust about how I can do these things.
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Each Day a New Beginning
Because society would rather we always wore a pretty face, women have been trained to cut off anger. --Nancy Friday
Anger is an emotion. Not a bad one, nor a good one; it simply exists when particular conditions in our lives are not met as we'd hoped.
We can get free of our anger if we choose to take action appropriate to it. Anger can be a healthy prompter of action. But when no action is taken, anger turns inward, negatively influencing our perceptions of all experiences, all human interaction.
We need to befriend all of our emotions. We need to trust that they all can serve us when we befriend them, learn from them, act in healthy concert with them. Our emotions reveal the many faces of our soul. And all are valid, deserving respect and acceptance. They are all representative of the inner self.
Because we are less at home with anger, it becomes more powerful. When we deny it, it doesn't disappear. It surfaces in unrelated circumstances, complicating our lives in unnecessary ways. We can learn to enjoy our anger by celebrating the positive action it prompts. We can cherish the growth that accompanies it, when we take the steps we need to.
It's okay for me to be angry today. It's growthful, if I use it for good.
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition
Chapter 10 - To Employers
After your man has gone along without drinking for a few months, you may be able to make use of his services with other employees who are giving you the alcoholic run-around—provided, of course, they are willing to have a third party in the picture. An alcoholic who has recovered, but holds a relatively unimportant job, can talk to a man with a better position. Being on a radically different basis of life, he will never take advantage of the situation.
p. 146
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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories
Because I'm An Alcoholic
This drinker finally found the answer to her nagging question, "Why?"
Alcohol helped. At least I thought it helped until I saw the oppressive thirty-year shadow it cast on my life. I discovered it in college, and although at first I didn't drink often (didn't have the opportunity), whenever I started, I drank as long as there was any alcohol around. It was a reflex. I don't remember liking the taste, but I liked that it seemed to bring me to life and get me through a date or party able to talk. It moved me outside of that hole I felt in myself and lowered the wall I created between me and any person or situation that made me uncomfortable.
p. 338
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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Step Eight - "Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all."
This is a very large order. It is a task which we may perform with increasing skill, but never really finish. Learning how to live in the greatest peace, partnership, and brotherhood with all men and women, of whatever description, is a moving and fascinating adventure. Every A.A. has found that he can make little headway in this new adventure of living until he first backtracks and really makes an accurate and unsparing survey of the human wreckage he has left in his wake. To a degree, he has already done this when taking moral inventory, but now the time has come when he ought to redouble his efforts to see how many people he has hurt, and in what ways. This reopening of emotional wounds, some old, some perhaps forgotten, and some still painfully festering, will at first look like a purposeless and pointless piece of surgery. But if a willing start is made, then the great advantages of doing this will so quickly reveal themselves that the pain will be lessened as one obstacle after another melts away.
pp. 77-78
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God is the source of all I need, and all others need.
--Shelley
"Call on God, but row away from the rocks."
--Indian proverb
"If you don't like something change it; if you can't change it, change the way you think about it."
--Mary Engelbreit
"Responsible persons are mature people who have taken charge of themselves and their
conduct, who own their actions and own up to them--who answer for them."
--William J. Bennett
"Silence fertilizes the deep place where personality grows. A life with a peaceful center can weather all storms."
--Norman Vincent Peale
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Father Leo's Daily Meditation
FAITH
"Faith is never identical with piety."
-- Karl Barth
Drugs make us artificial and unreal. They create a world of fantasy, rather than reality
and teach us how to escape rather than live. Everything is exaggerated and dehumanized
especially the practice of our religion. Often for the addict, religion becomes part of the
escape, a ritual that becomes exaggerated and theatrical, expecting magic rather than
miracle.
Madonnas are kissed, promises are made, confessions become routine, prayers are
mouthed and God is manipulated with the disease. Piety, the religious art of
showmanship, keeps us a prisoner of the small "god".
Faith takes seriously our pain and isolation and promises recovery only with change and
accepted responsibility. We must walk our prayers and live our rosary!
O God, build Your temple in my heart and Your altar in my daily sacrifice of love to self
and others.
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“I say this because I know what I am planning for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give
you hope and a good future. Then you will call my name. You will come to me and pray to
me, and I will listen to you. You will search for me. And when you search for me with all
your heart, you will find me.”
Jeremiah 29:11-13
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding..."
Proverbs 3:5
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Daily Inspiration
Study who you are and follow your heart because it will often lead you to miracles. Lord, in knowing who I am, I will become better able to know and serve You.
There is light behind every shadow. Lord, You are the light of the world. May I never forget to turn to You when my life fills with shadows.
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NA Just For Today
Fear or faith?
"No matter how far we ran, we always carried fear with us."
Basic Text, p. 14
For many of us, fear was a constant factor in our lives before we came to Narcotics Anonymous. We used because we were afraid to feel emotional or physical pain. Our fear of people and situations gave us a convenient excuse to use drugs. A few of us were so afraid of everything that we were unable even to leave our homes without using first.
As we stay clean, we replace our fear with a belief in the fellowship, the steps, and a Higher Power. As this belief grows, our faith in the miracle of recovery begins to color all aspects of our lives. We start to see ourselves differently. We realize we are spiritual beings, and we strive to live by spiritual principles.
The application of spiritual principles helps eliminate fear from our lives. By refraining from treating other people in harmful or unlawful ways, we find we needn't fear how we will be treated in return. As we practice love, compassion, understanding, and patience in our relationships with others, we are treated in turn with respect and consideration. We realize these positive changes result from allowing our Higher Power to work through us. We come to believe-not to think, but to believe-that our Higher Power wants only the best for us. No matter what the circumstances, we find we can walk in faith instead of fear.
Just for Today: I no longer need to run in fear, but can walk in faith that my Higher Power has only the best in store for me.
Page 328
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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
He who has courage and faith will never perish in misery! --Anne Frank
Someone once said happiness is like a butterfly: if we chase it, we'll never find it. But if we sit quietly, it will come and land on us. Faith and courage are the same. All we have to do is sit quietly and ask for these gifts from God. In time, and with patience, they will be ours, and so will the happiness we can then pass on to others.
Anne Frank wrote the above words facing a concentration camp and certain death. If she could find happiness and faith and courage within herself under those circumstances, then certainly we can too. These gifts are ours, already within us, if we but look for them.
What can I ask for today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Humility is just as much the opposite of self-abasement as it is of self-exaltation. --Dag Hammarskjold
In our struggles with self-hate and guilt, we may have thought we were humble - or perhaps even too humble. But self-abasement, which often alternates with feelings of superiority, is not the spiritual quality of humility that we strive for in our program.
With humility, we respect ourselves and our place in the universe. Humility is having ourselves in perspective, knowing we are connected to the whole world, accepting how small and powerless we are, and accepting the power and responsibility we have. With this spiritual feeling comes a sense of awe for the world we live in and a feeling of gratitude for the life we've been given.
The humility I feel today goes hand in hand with my self-respect and gratefulness for being part of life.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Because society would rather we always wore a pretty face, women have been trained to cut off anger. --Nancy Friday
Anger is an emotion. Not a bad one, nor a good one; it simply exists when particular conditions in our lives are not met as we'd hoped.
We can get free of our anger if we choose to take action appropriate to it. Anger can be a healthy prompter of action. But when no action is taken, anger turns inward, negatively influencing our perceptions of all experiences, all human interaction.
We need to befriend all of our emotions. We need to trust that they all can serve us when we befriend them, learn from them, act in healthy concert with them. Our emotions reveal the many faces of our soul. And all are valid, deserving respect and acceptance. They are all representative of the inner self.
Because we are less at home with anger, it becomes more powerful. When we deny it, it doesn't disappear. It surfaces in unrelated circumstances, complicating our lives in unnecessary ways. We can learn to enjoy our anger by celebrating the positive action it prompts. We can cherish the growth that accompanies it, when we take the steps we need to.
It's okay for me to be angry today. It's growthful, if I use it for good.
You are reading from the book Food for Thought.
Plan Plans, Not Results
Understanding that we do not have the power to control the results of our plans is an important step toward accepting reality. We do make plans, based on the information, experience, and insight which we have available to us. The outcome of our plans, however, is dependent on circumstances, which are frequently beyond our control.
When we accept the fact that the results of our plans are always in the hands of our Higher Power, we can relax and leave the outcome to Him. When we do not insist compulsively that life go according to our design, we are able to avoid the inevitable frustration produced by such an unrealistic attitude. However good our intentions, our designs are always finite and based on limited knowledge. We need to trust a Power greater than ourselves.
Our idea of what is best for ourselves and those we love may not always be right, according to God's will. The faith that He will carry out His design for us, even when we do not understand it, relieves us of much anxiety and frustration.
I leave results to You.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Beliefs about Money
I was starting a new job for a corporation. I was good at what I did for a living. The personnel manager and I were down to the details of employment, and he asked me how much money I believed I deserved. I thought about it and came up with a figure of $400 a month. This was back in the sixties. I didn't want to ask for too much, so I decided to ask for the smallest amount I could live with. He hired me and gave me what I asked for. Later on, when I left that job, the personnel manager told me he had been willing to pay me whatever I wanted. Had I asked for $600 or even $700 a month, which was a tremendous salary at that time, I would have gotten it. I had limited myself by what I believed I deserved. --Anonymous
What are our beliefs about money?
In moments of stress, doubt, uncertainty, anger or pain, I can pause and say the serenity prayer, knowing that I will get all the strength, courage and wisdom that I need. --Ruth Fishel
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Journey to the Heart
Release Guilt
Do whatever you need to do to release guilt. Do it often. Make that technique a regular part of your life.
Guilt has gotten a bad name. Many of us insist that we won’t feel guilt ever again, because we felt so much before, because it serves no purpose. Maybe we need to rethink guilt.
Guilt is a feeling. If it’s there and you don’t feel it, honor it, release it, it will block and stop you. It will control your energy and possibly control your life like anything else that’s denied and repressed. Acknowledging guilt won’t make it more real. Acknowledging guilt won’t lead to condemnation. Acknowledging guilt will help you release it. Write it out. Talk it out. Use a ritual from your church. Let yourself know your secrets, even the ones you’ve kept hidden from yourself until now.
Choose a way to express your guilt. Then watch it loosen and leave. That’s how we cleanse our souls.
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More Language Of Letting Go
Find a way to say I can
Slowly I began to see that many of the boxes I found myself in were of my own making. I tended to construct them, crawl in, then wonder who I could blame for putting me there. Who did this to me? I would wonder and sometimes ask aloud. That’s when I’d hear the answer. You did, Melody. You put yourself in this box. Now it’s up to you to get out.
–Melody Beattie, Stop Being Mean to Yourself
Each of us has our own degree of freedom. We have certain things we can do and certain things we can’t. Sometimes this freedom fluctuates at different times in our lives. Sometimes we are bound by our responsibilities to other people. Sometimes we have financial limitations. Sometimes we’re limited by what our body can or cannot do at any given point in time.
Alcoholics who know they cannot drink because they lose control when they do are people who are in touch with their power. They can’t drink, but they get to have a manageable life instead.
Healthy happy people know and recognize what they can do and what they truly can’t– at least not without unwanted repercussions. But sometimes we put too many limitations on ourselves. We look around. Because we’re so used to accepting our limitations, we automatically tell ourselves, I can’t do that, so I can’t do anything else.
I’ve been to the house, touched the rock collection, of the author George Sands who lived in southern France years and years ago during a time when women had few rights. It turned out that George was really a woman who took on a man’s name so she could write and sell her books. Her legend and her books still live on.
Identify what you legitimately can’t do or what you’d be better off and more powerful if you didn’t. Learn to live within those limitations. That’s how you’ll own your power.
But don’t stop there. Look around and see what you can do, too. Be creative. Knowing what we truly can’t do is often a stepping stone to discovering what we can do.
God, help me own my power by surrendering to what I can’t do. Then help me own my power some more by discovering what I can.
*****
Light of the Party
Confidence in Social Situations
If you’ve ever been to a social gathering where you’ve felt awkward and uncomfortable, chances are you are not alone. While social gatherings can be very enjoyable, especially when we are surrounded by people whose company we enjoy, there are social events that we attend where we sometimes find ourselves wishing we were someplace else. Such occasions can sometimes be the cause of much anxiety and self-consciousness. We may even feel like everyone else is having a good time except for us. Yet the truth is that everyone has felt shy and awkward on occasion. One of the best ways to overcome self-consciousness or get past your feelings of shyness at social gatherings is to focus on the people around you. If you can remember that other people might also be feeling awkward or shy, you might find the thought of speaking to them less intimidating or overwhelming.
The next time there is a social event you feel nervous about attending, you may want to try this exercise: Spend some time with your eyes closed and breathe deeply. When you feel ready, create your own zone of comfort by visualizing yourself surrounded in a warm white light that is protective yet accepting of others. Imagine people at the event being drawn to you because of the open and warm feelings that you are radiating. When you arrive at the event, take a moment to spread this same light of loving acceptance to everyone around you. Smile and greet people warmly. Try going up to someone who is standing alone and introduce yourself. When you radiate acceptance, openness, and receptivity, people can’t help but respond to you in kind.
Focusing on how we can make other people at a social gathering feel at ease can help us forget about our own insecurities. In the process, we end up making the very connections that we seek. The next time you attend a social gathering, invite people to join you in your zone of comfort that you have so lovingly and intentionally created. Let yourself enjoy being encircled in the warmth of their friendships. Published with permission from Daily OM
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A Day At A Time
Reflection For The Day
When I first came to The Program, I thought that humility was just another word for weakness. But I gradually learned that there’s nothing incompatible between humility and intellect, just as long as I place humility first. As soon as I began to do that, I was told, I would receive the gift of faith — a faith which would work for me as it has worked and continues to work for countless others who have been freed of their addictions and have found a new way of life in The Program. Have I come to believe, in the words of Heine, that “The actions of men are like the index of a book; they point out what is most remarkable in them…”?
Today I Pray
May I never let my intelligence be an excuse for lack of humility. It is so easy, if I consider myself reasonably bright and capable of making decisions and handling my own affairs, to look down upon humility as a property of those less intelligent. May I remember that intelligence and humility are both God-given.
Today I Will Remember
If I have no humility, I have no intelligence.
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One More Day
It is easier to confess a defect than to claim a quality.
– Max Beerbohm
It is easy to simply admit our character defects — and then do nothing about them. The difficult part is asking God — however we picture God — to remove our defects and then live with the choices we have made.
We may have apologized to friends, and then added, “but I’ve always been that way.” Or, “I just can’t seem to help it.” We might have used such excuses to avoid looking honestly at ourselves. When we sincerely examine our character defects and have the desire to change, our confessions to others no longer are made with excuses. Instead, we admit our flaws, ask our Higher Power to remove them, and then take responsibility for working toward qualities we admire.
My defects can be changed once I admit them and begin to work on eliminating them.
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Food For Thought
Plan Plans, Not Results
Understanding that we do not have the power to control the results of our plans is an important step toward accepting reality. We do make plans, based on the information, experience, and insight which we have available to us. The outcome of our plans, however, is dependent on circumstances, which are frequently beyond our control.
When we accept the fact that the results of our plans are always in the hands of our Higher Power, we can relax and leave the outcome to Him. When we do not insist compulsively that life go according to our design, we are able to avoid the inevitable frustration produced by such an unrealistic attitude. However good our intentions, our designs are always finite and based on limited knowledge. We need to trust a Power greater than ourselves.
Our idea of what is best for ourselves and those we love may not always be right, according to God's will. The faith that He will carry out His design for us, even when we do not understand it, relieves us of much anxiety and frustration.
I leave results to You.
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One Day At A Time
~ SELF-WILL ~
Our whole trouble has been the misuse of willpower.
We had tried to bombard our problems with it
instead of attempting to bring it into agreement with God's intention for us.
The AA Twelve and Twelve
I want the answers to all my questions and the solutions to all of my problems RIGHT NOW. Furthermore, I want to tell my Higher Power what I want those answers and solutions to be. I think I know what's best for me and what will bring long-lasting peace and serenity to my life.
My self-will has gotten me hurt and possibly caused me to hurt others. It has convinced me I could do things my way and everything would be just fine. My self-will has helped me lie to myself about my disease of compulsive overeating, anorexia, or bulimia; it has convinced me that darkness was light and that I should have what I want exactly when I want it.
How grateful I am that my Higher Power loves me enough to not take my advice! How grateful I am that, after I've plunged head-first into the same wall at least one hundred times as I tried to force my own answers and solutions, my Higher Power is waiting patiently to bless me by leading me where He would have me go. How grateful I am that I don't have to run into the wall of my self-will as often or as hard as I once did. One day, maybe I won't run into it at all.
One Day at a Time . . .
I can let go of self-will and remember that the Third Step says we "made a decision to turn our will and our lives over the the care of God as we understood Him." The care of God ... God can take better care of me than I can of myself.
~ Sandee ~
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AA 'Big Book' - Quote
If a person has cancer all are sorry for him and no one is angry or hurt. But not so with the alcoholic illness, for with it there goes annihilation of all things worth while in life. It engulfs all whose lives touch the sufferer's. It brings misunderstanding, fierce resentment, financial insecurity, disgusted friends and employers, warped lives of blameless children, sad wives and parents - anyone can increase the list. - Pg. 18 - There Is A Solution
Hour To Hour - Book - Quote
Doubts can be a good thing. It shows we're still thinking. Of course we doubt the wisdom of taking steps, going to meetings, and practicing spiritual principles to arrest this deadly disease of addiction. Even Thomas doubted his path with Jesus, but given time, he saw the wisdom of the spiritual path. His doubts were allayed.
May my doubts, like Thomas's fade away in time, as I observe the miracles in myself and others.
Higher Power Within Me
Today, I recognize that a Higher Power lives and breathes inside me, through me, as me. I used to think that God was the chairperson of somebody else's board, and I spent my time in search of another person's version of a Higher Power. But really, there is no searching - it is more like an acceptance. That is the well-kept secret: that God lives, not in the heavens or inside special buildings, but within my very self. My direct access to myself is my direct access to my Higher Power, and my estrangement from myself is my estrangement from my Higher Power. We are co-creators, hand-in-glove, a team. Today, I see allowing God into my life as an act of surrender, acceptance and love.I love my Higher Power and my Higher Power loves me - we are one.
- Tian Dayton PhD
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
Not knowing, is not the problem. Not being OK with not knowing is the problem.
I don't need to figure it out. I just need to do it.
"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book
Don't let your reality check bounce.
Time for Joy - Book - Quote
In moments of stress, doubt, uncertainty, anger or pain, I can pause and say the serenity prayer, knowing that I will get all the strength, courage and wisdom that I need.
Alkiespeak - Book - Quote
If alcoholism is a three-fold disease; mental, physical - and the mental and physical mix together and create a soul sickness - and psycho therapy is mental, which is one-fold. I'd be trying to treat a three-fold illness with one fold, which would leave me two fold short. Which would explain why I felt like I was bringing a knife to a gunfight my whole life. - Scott R.
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