Guener

Today I had a bad afternoon, not because of some catastrophe, just tired and feeling somewhat disappointed about not getting more done. I developed a case of the f*-its at the office and put down everything and just waited for the day to end.

As I stewed over this for a while, the negative thoughts I was having began to infect me with remembering what it was like to relax (forget) beyond my troubled feelings by drinking. This hasn't happened to me in a long time now, and it furthered my criticisms of myself for not responding well today. I understood that I was experiencing cravings.

So, I headed into the apartment to consider what I was going to do for the evening that wasn't going to mean picking up a drink. I went to the store and got the newspaper and a candy bar, came home and wrote to my folks that I wasn't going to be able to make my evening phone call, jumped into the shower, changed my clothes, and I made some dinner. I felt safe again, and still do.

I've made some plans for tomorrow to improve how I'm feeling about myself re: things that are bothering me. The amazing thing is how I seem to have forgotten how that dreaded feeling of wanting a drink can appear at any time. It has also reminded me to take a look at my safety plan and see if I need to make sure it's sound.

At any rate, I felt I needed to share my experience to help put it behind me.

least

The longer you're sober, the fewer thoughts of drinking you'll have.

bexxed

It can come out of nowhere, seemingly. But it does get better and easier and more rare. It sounds like you did good.

PhoenixJ

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