First post
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 1
First post
Hi.
I am a new comer here and would like to share some of my thoughts on a not so new problem. I have been a regular binge drinker since I was able to obtain alcohol (around 13 years old) and had several years of daily use, although I have not been a daily drinker for a couple of years (I don't work around alcohol anymore).
Today is number 3 sober following a 3 day binge from Friday through Sunday and I have been negotiating the familiar patern of worry, anxiety, regret, physical ill feeling etc and now ultimately just feel deflated. My intention is - as always - to stop drinking completely, but I have been here before and know that in 2 or 3 weeks of hard work and good intention my resolve will likely give way in favour of a day or two of not caring.
In many ways I believe the drinking to be symptomatic of underlying anxiety issues that have developed over the years - possibly because of continued drinking.
Any input input welcome.
Thanks for reading.
I am a new comer here and would like to share some of my thoughts on a not so new problem. I have been a regular binge drinker since I was able to obtain alcohol (around 13 years old) and had several years of daily use, although I have not been a daily drinker for a couple of years (I don't work around alcohol anymore).
Today is number 3 sober following a 3 day binge from Friday through Sunday and I have been negotiating the familiar patern of worry, anxiety, regret, physical ill feeling etc and now ultimately just feel deflated. My intention is - as always - to stop drinking completely, but I have been here before and know that in 2 or 3 weeks of hard work and good intention my resolve will likely give way in favour of a day or two of not caring.
In many ways I believe the drinking to be symptomatic of underlying anxiety issues that have developed over the years - possibly because of continued drinking.
Any input input welcome.
Thanks for reading.
Mr
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: FRANCE
Posts: 5,230
Welcome to the forum JB.
Most of us do have underlying issues indeed.
THe only possible way of being able to identify and address them is by getting sober. We are always one drink away from being the addict again...
Its one day at a time in the early days but those days turn into weeks and the weeks turn into months. Its not always a walk in the park but its a hell of lot better than being in the grips of drink.
Keep posting and join some recurrent threads, maybe hop into the October 2018 class...
Take care
Most of us do have underlying issues indeed.
THe only possible way of being able to identify and address them is by getting sober. We are always one drink away from being the addict again...
Its one day at a time in the early days but those days turn into weeks and the weeks turn into months. Its not always a walk in the park but its a hell of lot better than being in the grips of drink.
Keep posting and join some recurrent threads, maybe hop into the October 2018 class...
Take care
Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: 45th Parallel, Michigan
Posts: 816
Welcome to SR -- it's a great place to share some thoughts, maybe even get some good advice! At the very least, you're surrounded by lots of people who understand how you're feeling.
I agree with Vman: any of our mental health issues are pretty much irrelevant when we're using alcohol to deal with them (and you're right, it's usually causing some of them.) A daily decision to abstain is within your power; doing that consecutively every single day leads to permanent sobriety. I know that sounds ridiculously oversimplified, but it's true. Not easy when your AV ("pickle brain") is screaming lies at you! One of the worst lies it ever told me was "I don't care anymore."
Fight back; that voice is powerless. You are not.
I agree with Vman: any of our mental health issues are pretty much irrelevant when we're using alcohol to deal with them (and you're right, it's usually causing some of them.) A daily decision to abstain is within your power; doing that consecutively every single day leads to permanent sobriety. I know that sounds ridiculously oversimplified, but it's true. Not easy when your AV ("pickle brain") is screaming lies at you! One of the worst lies it ever told me was "I don't care anymore."
Fight back; that voice is powerless. You are not.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Welcome, and yep, I agree with Arp and VM. I have only been able to deal with my anxiety disorder and the like once I got sober.
You have to decide you want to be sober more than you want to drink, as our friend Least often says...and you can.
Hope to see you around- IRLsupport is crucial for me, too.
You have to decide you want to be sober more than you want to drink, as our friend Least often says...and you can.
Hope to see you around- IRLsupport is crucial for me, too.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Northwest U.S.
Posts: 778
Welcome JB! SR is a great place for support, commitment, and accountability. Stick around.
It is quite the paradox that we turn to alcohol in order to manage our stress and anxiety and, in time, alcohol becomes the chief cause of our stress and anxiety.
I recommend that you make a plan and put in writing for exactly how you plan to deal with that moment of weakness that you describe. There are some great threads on this board about written recovery plans.
Good luck and thanks for the post!
It is quite the paradox that we turn to alcohol in order to manage our stress and anxiety and, in time, alcohol becomes the chief cause of our stress and anxiety.
I recommend that you make a plan and put in writing for exactly how you plan to deal with that moment of weakness that you describe. There are some great threads on this board about written recovery plans.
Good luck and thanks for the post!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,560
It's great to have you join us, JB. Not feeling alone anymore really helped me when I found SR.
I thought alcohol was an answer for my shyness, anxiety, & other things. Instead of facing my issues head on, I hid from them for decades. It feels so good to get free of it and face things with a clear head. I hope you'll keep reading & posting - we care about you.
I thought alcohol was an answer for my shyness, anxiety, & other things. Instead of facing my issues head on, I hid from them for decades. It feels so good to get free of it and face things with a clear head. I hope you'll keep reading & posting - we care about you.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,431
Hi and welcome jb313
I would drink until I was sick, get well again, feel great, and start drinking again. Did that for years....
Joining this community made it that much harder for me to rationalise I didn't have a problem and go back to drinking.
My advice is to post here often and ask for help, ask questions, or simply just help someone else.
We have a support thread for everyone trying to quit this month - why not check it out too>
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...art-1-a-16.htm
D
I would drink until I was sick, get well again, feel great, and start drinking again. Did that for years....
Joining this community made it that much harder for me to rationalise I didn't have a problem and go back to drinking.
My advice is to post here often and ask for help, ask questions, or simply just help someone else.
We have a support thread for everyone trying to quit this month - why not check it out too>
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...art-1-a-16.htm
D
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 33
Hi JB313!
Welcome! We're so glad you are here with us. I've definitely been in your shoes before. I found during those initial first days and weeks, when I wanted to turn back to drinking, that repeatedly telling myself that I was worth sobriety, that I was worth the work involved in recovery and giving the liquor store the middle finger anytime I was tempted or walked/drove by it, really helped me until I found lasting sobriety. It is a fight for your life, and you are so worth it. Until I was strong enough to no longer view alcohol as the enemy, I treated it as such and when I finally decided and committed to winning over it- the real work of dealing with myself and my underlying mental health could really begin. It has been so worth it and I know you can do it. A day at a time, an hour at a time, a minute at a time.
Keep coming back here, we are always here to support you regardless!
Welcome! We're so glad you are here with us. I've definitely been in your shoes before. I found during those initial first days and weeks, when I wanted to turn back to drinking, that repeatedly telling myself that I was worth sobriety, that I was worth the work involved in recovery and giving the liquor store the middle finger anytime I was tempted or walked/drove by it, really helped me until I found lasting sobriety. It is a fight for your life, and you are so worth it. Until I was strong enough to no longer view alcohol as the enemy, I treated it as such and when I finally decided and committed to winning over it- the real work of dealing with myself and my underlying mental health could really begin. It has been so worth it and I know you can do it. A day at a time, an hour at a time, a minute at a time.
Keep coming back here, we are always here to support you regardless!
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