DragonZ1313

I started drinking in college and I’m now 33 years old. I’m a binge drinker on Friday and Saturday night. Typically in a weekend I will drink one bottle of vodka. I also smoke when I drink. I’m so scared for my health. I do good all week and I’m super healthy and workout and go to work during the week. But once the weekend comes I don’t know how to not drink. I even will wake up Saturday and make a drink after being hungover from Friday night. I Told myself I wasn’t going to drink last Friday and I did. I went to the store and purchased the bottle myself. After the weekend binge is over (right now) I get horrible anxiety. I’m in a complete panic and I’m so scared i did major damage to my body. I’m married with one child and I have a very good life and a good job. I need to know what worked for you? I keep hearing people say they’ve been sober for so long now and I can only go 5 days (Sunday-Thursday). It’s a horrible cycle and I have no control over it and I’m clueless as how to break it. Please give me your advice. I’ve tried making plans for Saturday so I’ll stay sober Friday night but it never works. I drink anyways and miss the plans on Saturday. Thank you.

Maudcat

Hi, Dragon.
Welcome.
You will find lots of support here.
I don’t have much advice, but that you want to make changes is a good thing.
You might want to check out the October “class.”
It’s a thread here for the newly sober and those who want to be.
I know others will be along to welcome you and offer support.
Peace.

August252015

Glad you are here! Great first step - so much support here. You might want to look in this forum and find the "Class of October 2018" - it is people quitting or considering it during this month, so the same timeframe as you.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...rt-1-a-13.html

I'm an AA person and IRL support is a crucial thing for me. There are plenty of other groups- you can look around the forums here and find ones on 12 Step, Secular Recovery, lots of stuff. Other folks have a practice of using SR as a touchstone (I am sure they will chime in) - those of us with some amount of sobriety find that a routine that includes daily support, new habits, different ways of coping with life....all critical to recovery.

You will also hear from folks that are weekend/binge drinkers like you have shared, or all day/every day ones like me by the time I quit. Whatever the "kind" of alcoholic, the thing is that we can't stop once we start, see damage in areas of our lives, know deep down that "something" is wrong with our drinking....

As far as what to do - I sure had to fill my hours with whatever I could not to drink - whether that meant Netflix binges (yep), not leaving the house (yep), having people around like my parents who got me through what was a terrible withdrawal given how sick I was....as long as I did not drink, it got better one day at a time.

Hope to see you here- you can get sober if you want to more than you want to drink.

Maudcat

Good thoughts and suggestions from August.

GhostFace

Hi Dragon,

Im just like you. I binge on the weekend and now i have 3 to 8 beers a night. What worked for me in the past was going to the gym, eating healthy, meditating and not having idle time. This forum was essential to my recovery. You will find lots of support here.

biminiblue

In early days I just told myself - I don't drink. Whenever the thoughts to drink came, I repeated that and then found a window to wash or some clothes to fold or whatever little chore would keep me moving and not dwelling on the drinking thoughts.

My goal every morning was to hit the pillow that night sober. If I did that it was a successful day. Nothing was going to throw me off my promise to myself.

Years later I'm still mindful to make that pledge in the morning.

I had to change a lot of things about myself when I got sober, I had a lot of negative thinking and beliefs.

I was a daily drinker so I had to make routines and plans and have answers for that voice in my head that told me to drink.

Daily exercise and a healthy nutrition plan are at the top of my daily self-care.

Welcome. Read around and keep posting!

DragonZ1313

I go to the gym Sunday-Thursday. I just feel so disappointed in myself because I really wanted to be sober this weekend. Everything seems so bad right now but I know it’s the effects of the hangover causing my anxiety and depression. I feel like this weekend binging is never going to end. It really does feel hopeless. I don’t know what it’s going to take. I don’t even o out and drink anymore. It’s all taking place in my home. I try to stay off social media and not text anyone so I won’t do or say anything stupid. I really wonder if I’ll ever get a sober weekend.

biminiblue

Here's the link to the "Class of October" thread:

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...-part-1-a.html

DragonZ1313

I’m starting to think I need a whole new routine. It’s scary. I have a really good 9-5 job that I enjoy but I think that’s promoting my weekend binging as well. As soon as Friday hits I can’t wait to drink vodka.

yinzer

Yes, you need a whole new routine on the weekends. How old is your child? Are there things you can do with your family on Friday night rather than drink? In the beginning, it’s tough, but it gets easier over time. Take it one hour at a time, one day at a time, one weekend at a time. You will never regret a sober weekend.

DragonZ1313

He’s 9. It’s probably better to look at it hour by hour. When I look at the big picture (entire weekend) all I see is me binging on alcohol again. It’s very overwhelming to look at it that way. Thank you for the advice.

August252015

^^^whatever increments of time you need is ok! Breaking it down made it more manageable for me.

PalmerSage

Welcome to the forum! I've used Sober Recovery as my main source of support since I quit drinking about 10 months ago. Especially in the very early days, I relied heavily on my class (October 2018 for you, as others have mentioned). Anytime I felt like drinking, or like something came up and I didn't think I could cope with it without alcohol - I posted and read here until the feeling passed, and it always did. The central question for me was, and still is, how can I cope with life without using drinking as my go-to default mechanism? How can I ever have fun without alcohol? So I've spent the better part of a year trying new strategies, including journaling, walking/exercise, lots of sweets, reading books, and most importantly, learning from fellow alcoholics. We are absolutely here to support you 100%. Good luck!

DragonZ1313

I’m already thinking about how will I ever be able to go on vacations and weddings without drinking. Congrats on the 10 months! I hope I can get to your point one day.

AAPJ

My annual summer beach vacation was always a week long drinking binge. But for the last three summers it has been a sober event. We vacation with several families with children and most of them drink during the week too. They seem to have accepted my sobriety rather well. Two things I didn't expect.

1 My week long drinking event meant I was totally exhausted when I returned from vacation. Now I return refreshed and rested.

2 Our children are all teenagers now - high schoolers/college. The children from the other families appreciate the fact that we (me & my wife) are often the only people awake after dinner to oversee evening events. The other parents are too buzzed from their day of drinking so they go to bed shortly after dinner. They are old enough to recognize the impact of their parents drinking beer and wine coolers on the beach all day long and I think they have gotten generally annoyed with their parent's behavior.

August252015

I was very slow to go to dinner parties, birthday parties, trips, weddings....not out of fear but out of my sole focus on building strength and emotional stability in sobriety. I never had regret over saying no to anyone or anything. What I do go to now is always my choice, and I stay a strong long as it's fun or time enough for making a gracious exit, and it's a ok. Takes time.

Zebra1275

Good suggestions on how to get sober.

At your age, I drank sort of like you.

Drinking on Saturday morning to ease the hangover from Friday night is a really bad idea. And if you keep it up, it won't belong until you are drinking on Sunday morning to relieve the hangover from Saturday night.

Alcoholism is progressive. What will your drinking behavior look like when you hit 40? Or 50?

Another thing you probably don't realize yet, is that the bodies ability recover from drinking decreases with age. Bad hangovers at 33 are nothing compared to bad hangovers at 43 or 53.

Mango212

Fear feeds fear. It sucks. Fear happens. It can be helpful simply to acknowledge it.

Recovery is possible.

Reaching out and asking for help are healthy actions. Welcome to SR.

nez

I have an off wall suggestion that will only take an hour of your time. Next Friday night after work, go to an meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. Could be an hour well spent. Could be a waste of an hour. Either way it is just an hour.

DragonZ1313

Thank you all for the suggestions. I’m also considering getting a second job on the weekends. Working 9-5 during the week is one of the only things that has kept me sober. And pregnancy which I went right back to the weekend binges after my baby was born.