Denial.. 2 weeks sober and no going back!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2018
Posts: 3
Denial.. 2 weeks sober and no going back!
I never thought I actually had an issue with alcohol, I enjoyed my daily post work drinks, at home and often on my own! Big nights out most weekends.. Quite happily doing this for the last 5 years!
Two weeks ago after a night in with a friend, I drank nearly a whole bottle of vodka and had a dreadful hangover, I realised what was happening, not even sure how it started.
I had become dependent on alcohol to get by, but it had taken control and had many side affects, but the worst for me was severe anxiety, social anxiety that was getting worse and worse.
I considered leaving my job to avoid the anxiety, a job I love, I couldn't meet friends without having a drink first, even going to a shop could be difficult at times, actually most of the time, always hoping I wouldn't bump into someone I know.
I would come home from work and after a drink I wouldn't go out again, I wasn't sad or depressed, actually I was quite happy, or so I thought!
So two weeks in, my life has changed so much, within days my confidence grew, my anxiety shakes reduced greatly, a felt a clarity I had forgotten existed.
last weekend I had a weekend away with the girls, there was a lot of alcohol involved and I had an amazing time not drinking.
This week my skin is better, my eyes are clear, even my sister commented on my eyes and my colleague said I was glowing!! This made me feel great!
After work I go home, have my tea and can out again, I can drive anywhere in the evenings now - shopping, to see friends and family, it's been a long time since I have done this.
Tonight was incredible, I had a night out with friends, I drove and they drank! A busy pub in town where I wouldn't have set foot without alcohol previously. It was a great evening and I felt amazing!
All of my friends are big drinkers and I had some fear about this separating me from them, but now know that this won't happen, they may tire of my stories about me giving up drinking but today two have said that they are considering doing the same.
I wrote a short poem last night about how I feel.. I've written very few poems the last few years so again something else is back on track -
Sober Me
I don't know what has happened to me,
I'm sharp as a knife and feeling free.
Something changed that held the key.
Oh yeah I discovered sobriety!
Something great has happened to me.
I suddenly seem to be able to see.
I'm feeling so much more like I used to be.
So happy I discovered sobriety!
Something amazing happened to me.
I seem to have got rid of my anxiety.
If only I had know how easy it could be.
I have discovered sobriety.
Something awesome happened to me.
But future feels much brighter and happy.
Although my past is blurred and hazy.
Eventually I discovered sobriety.
Something wonderful is going to happen to me.
The way I feel is full of glee.
Once again I am Sophie.
And right now I am choosing sobriety.
Something awful once happened to me.
But now that I am finally alcohol free.
I realise the stuff was poisoning me.
Thank god I chose sobriety.
Loving life once more.. MissB
Two weeks ago after a night in with a friend, I drank nearly a whole bottle of vodka and had a dreadful hangover, I realised what was happening, not even sure how it started.
I had become dependent on alcohol to get by, but it had taken control and had many side affects, but the worst for me was severe anxiety, social anxiety that was getting worse and worse.
I considered leaving my job to avoid the anxiety, a job I love, I couldn't meet friends without having a drink first, even going to a shop could be difficult at times, actually most of the time, always hoping I wouldn't bump into someone I know.
I would come home from work and after a drink I wouldn't go out again, I wasn't sad or depressed, actually I was quite happy, or so I thought!
So two weeks in, my life has changed so much, within days my confidence grew, my anxiety shakes reduced greatly, a felt a clarity I had forgotten existed.
last weekend I had a weekend away with the girls, there was a lot of alcohol involved and I had an amazing time not drinking.
This week my skin is better, my eyes are clear, even my sister commented on my eyes and my colleague said I was glowing!! This made me feel great!
After work I go home, have my tea and can out again, I can drive anywhere in the evenings now - shopping, to see friends and family, it's been a long time since I have done this.
Tonight was incredible, I had a night out with friends, I drove and they drank! A busy pub in town where I wouldn't have set foot without alcohol previously. It was a great evening and I felt amazing!
All of my friends are big drinkers and I had some fear about this separating me from them, but now know that this won't happen, they may tire of my stories about me giving up drinking but today two have said that they are considering doing the same.
I wrote a short poem last night about how I feel.. I've written very few poems the last few years so again something else is back on track -
Sober Me
I don't know what has happened to me,
I'm sharp as a knife and feeling free.
Something changed that held the key.
Oh yeah I discovered sobriety!
Something great has happened to me.
I suddenly seem to be able to see.
I'm feeling so much more like I used to be.
So happy I discovered sobriety!
Something amazing happened to me.
I seem to have got rid of my anxiety.
If only I had know how easy it could be.
I have discovered sobriety.
Something awesome happened to me.
But future feels much brighter and happy.
Although my past is blurred and hazy.
Eventually I discovered sobriety.
Something wonderful is going to happen to me.
The way I feel is full of glee.
Once again I am Sophie.
And right now I am choosing sobriety.
Something awful once happened to me.
But now that I am finally alcohol free.
I realise the stuff was poisoning me.
Thank god I chose sobriety.
Loving life once more.. MissB
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Miss,
I quit when I was 28 for 8 months. It seemed so easy.
Nothing changed except that I stopped drinking.
So I started again. It was easy the first time, probably going to be easy the second time.
Wrong.
At 8 months I was still craving and didn't realize it. I was probably having trouble dealing with the world sober at that point and gave in to the crave.
Fast forward 20 years. Stopping this time was a living hell on earth.
Basically, insanity coupled with physical weakness.
Brain damage and organ damage of course.
It took well over 2 years to really start to feel better. I am having to relearn how to handle life sober.
Great job on 2 weeks.
Try hard not to relapse otherwise...see above.
Thanks.
I quit when I was 28 for 8 months. It seemed so easy.
Nothing changed except that I stopped drinking.
So I started again. It was easy the first time, probably going to be easy the second time.
Wrong.
At 8 months I was still craving and didn't realize it. I was probably having trouble dealing with the world sober at that point and gave in to the crave.
Fast forward 20 years. Stopping this time was a living hell on earth.
Basically, insanity coupled with physical weakness.
Brain damage and organ damage of course.
It took well over 2 years to really start to feel better. I am having to relearn how to handle life sober.
Great job on 2 weeks.
Try hard not to relapse otherwise...see above.
Thanks.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2018
Posts: 3
Hi D122y,
Thank you for your message!
Until 2 weeks ago I didn't realise I had a problem with alcohol,
I've been a regular drinker for over 20 years but the last 5 years I became a daily drinker and a binge drinker. I am very determined to stick to this and happy to hear that you have quit it again.
Thank you for your message!
Until 2 weeks ago I didn't realise I had a problem with alcohol,
I've been a regular drinker for over 20 years but the last 5 years I became a daily drinker and a binge drinker. I am very determined to stick to this and happy to hear that you have quit it again.
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