Dandelion12

I was up all night.

Scared. Im just scared.

Everything is irritating me. I see no hope for my life. But im not drinking.

Is this usual for 8 days?

I feel worthless

Dee74

It was normal for me, for sure Dandelion.

I think we can really underestimate the impact our drinking had on us emotionally as well as physically. I felt like I was still thinking doom and gloom several weeks out from my last drink - naturally I hope the doom and gloom won't last as long for you

It will pass - hang in there

D

Freshstartagain

I’m on day 10 and I’m finding going to sleep a nightmare! I’m so used to drinking until I pass out I think I’ve forgotten how to naturally fall asleep. I’m finding reading, knitting and no TV or phone helps with relaxing me.

The scaredness sounds like maybe a symptom of tiredness? Are you able to just sleep through one day? Maybe on the weekend? I promise you, letting yourself catch up on the missed slewp, even for one night, will help massively with clarity and reminding yourself why you’re doing this.

Freshstartagain

Personally I found the doom and gloom subsided quite a bit for me over the weekend when I was able to catch up on missed sleep. It was like my brain was able to go ‘ahhhh’

Dandelion12

Thank you so much. I really appreciate you folks being here. This is awful.

Not saying im planning anything rash, but I totally understand why some choose to just end it. It scares me that i do

aasharon90

Good sober morning to you Dandelion.

Last night is over, behind you, gone. Period.

Look at today. What is right now.

You are absolutely sober without any poison
flowing thru out your mind body and soul. The
further away from alcohol you are, moving forward
each day, the healthier you will become.

The light and joy will appear in your eyes
and in your face and the spring will return
to your step.

With 60 knocking on my door, I feel like
im a young person. Not too young, but
young enough to giggle and think light
hearted at whatever life throws at me.

As long as you, we, us dont let poison
enter our bodies, we can accomplish
most things young folks can do. Maybe
even better....lol

Keep positive and always ask for help
in what could be the next best thing in
remaining sober and handling situations
that would normally stump us. Okay?

You are not alone here with us in SR, but
you have to continue wanting the willingness,
openmindedness and honesty to achieve
health and happiness and most of all....
Sobriety.

Dandelion12

Thanks all so much.

Poison is right. Im baffled, just baffled as to why i would do this to myself.

Im only happy if Im beating myself up. I dont know why.

Thank you

Tonymblue

It was for me. It will get better. Hang in there.

darinissober38

I'm still in the mess stage myself and still drinking, but I've stopped for days here and there and yes, those feelings were setting in for me as well. When I analyzed what they are? I think you're sobering up and realizing what guilt you have for the drinking. You have to face it and it's hard. For me, it's thoughts of, "why was I doing that to myself" etc; etc...

J50

I think we understand the toll alcohol takes on our bodies, but underestimate what it does to our brains. Our brain, like our body, accommodates the alcohol and when taken away it can cause havoc. It takes time to readjust. Take care of yourself. Try to get a little exercise and eat well, and feel comfort knowing that in time it will get better.

(Edit - I just realized I repeated what Dee said, but it's true.)

Dandelion12

Thank you for helping me everyone.

This is a scary, hellish place Im in and i wouldnt wish this on anyone. Ever.

Theres just nowhere to run and nowhere to hide

Im only surviving by the grace of God

tekink

Hang in there, I was a mess for a while. Time helps but passing time can seem like agony.

J50

It took a while for me to get out of that place, maybe a month or two and it scared the hell out of me. In hindsight, I wish I would've supplemented with a vitamin B complex as it helps with the nervous system, but run it by your doctor first.

Dandelion12

I never wanted to be this person

All i know is i need to make it through the night

I dont know how to do this anymore

apollo986

Stay strong and committed Dandelion! 8 days is great!!

Dandelion12

Nobody in real life will help so thank you guys for being here for me.

It seems like all i ever wanted was someone to be here for me.

Thanks for giving me some peace.

J50

I very much wanted to drink those feelings away in the beginning, but knew it would only prolong the agony.

It is rough no doubt but it will pass, I promise.

Do anything but drink.

Also, make sure you drink plenty of water, eat some nutritious food, and go for a walk.

Consider a multivitamin, as your body starts to normalize.

Understand that while scary, this will be the worst it will ever be as long as you stop now.

You can do it!

aasharon90

Afternoon Dandelion. I'm not sure I know
where you are located. In the states or out
of the country. Maybe you can share with us
what your area looks like where you live.

Is it the city or in the country?

Is it a busy place or is it quiet, peaceful?

What all did you do today?

I dont know if you've ever been to an AA
meeting or not? Do you have a church nearby?

When you have time, just share with us who
are walking with you on your journey to get
to know a little more about you. It would be
like as if we all met for coffee or tea and either
sat outside or in a café or something and just
chit chat with each other about our day.

Dandelion12

No one is going to help me.

I cant live, sober or not .

I was basically a shut in while married for 25 years.

Divorced now. Im a hopeless loser.

I have no one

I would give anything to be ok. To be normal.

I tried to clear up the childhood trauma in therapy while married.

Life went on for everyone else and im stuck.

I would give anything to wake up and find out this was all i bad dream I feel so guilty and ashamed.

I dont want to die but i cant live

Im just despondent

I feel like im screaming inside. I guess im crazy

Dandelion12

I dont know whats going to happen to me if i cant fix this. Why couldnt i have died in my sleep when my family was still alive?