Have there been any positives come from your drinking?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 253
Have there been any positives come from your drinking?
Hi. I've pondered this the last couple of days. I'm struggling with stopping drinking. I go for months and don't touch a drop but then will have a relapse lasting a day or 2. This last one last week was just a day but still left me feeling terrible, guilt stricken and questioning my place in the world yet again. I feel like a failure and ending it all is something I think about frequently (although because I have family would never act on).
Give me some positives of this illness (and I believe it is albeit a controllable one!). What have you learnt from it? There has to be a lot of introspection when recovering from this.
Give me some positives of this illness (and I believe it is albeit a controllable one!). What have you learnt from it? There has to be a lot of introspection when recovering from this.
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Join Date: Sep 2018
Location: UK
Posts: 135
Charlie
Sorry to hear it can make you feel so down.
Remember if you are in the UK you can always call Samaritans free on 116 123 when are you feeling really low. They won't tell what to do (or what not to do) - they will just listen and help you work through things yourself.
Sorry to hear it can make you feel so down.
Remember if you are in the UK you can always call Samaritans free on 116 123 when are you feeling really low. They won't tell what to do (or what not to do) - they will just listen and help you work through things yourself.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
I think the biggest positive that has come from living a drinking life now that I am sober is gratitude. I am so so grateful for everything I have now and I am not talking about material possessions. I have my health, all my senses, my arms and legs. I can walk and I can run! I have a loving family I abused for many years who love me and are so happy I am sober. I have a daughter I adore and who I can be a responsible and loving parent to. A niece and a nephew. Friends. Real friends. Not drinkibg buddies!!! I appreciate the simple beauty in the world. The sun, the rain, the sea (I live on the coast). All the things I didn't give a **** about when I was drinking. All that mattered to me was alcohol. Where my next drink was coming from. I am so grateful to go to bed sober and wake without a hangover. All the things that "normal" people take for granted everyday. Alcohol robbed me of so much but living that life and now being given a 2nd chance (as alcohok nearly killed me) to live a different way of life,sober, is a true gift.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,414
None from my drinking I'm afraid Charliesworld - lots from my recovery tho .
Maybe, if you want to, you can share what you've been doing to stay sober - maybe we can help with more suggestions?
Like Michael said please phone the Samaritians or some other crisis line if you feel at the end of your tether.
Addiction makes us feel there's no point and it's hopeless but that's simply not the case
D
Maybe, if you want to, you can share what you've been doing to stay sober - maybe we can help with more suggestions?
Like Michael said please phone the Samaritians or some other crisis line if you feel at the end of your tether.
Addiction makes us feel there's no point and it's hopeless but that's simply not the case
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
Do yoy have a programme of recovery? I am in AA and the 12 steps are teaching me a beautiful design for living I never thought possible. I felt I had no place... what was the point in life?? What was my purpose? Poor me, poor me,pour me a drink!!! AA is helping me to remove my guilt, my self pity, my resentments. I am already more honest and less selfish. I have a programme of recovery to help me live and enjoy my life sober. AA is not for everyone but there are lots of different programmes out there.
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Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by charliesworld 
Give me some positives of this illness (and I believe it is albeit a controllable one!).
You can control the not drinking part. It's daily recovery.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Yep. Sobriety. I truly believe that being an alcoholic is the best thing that ever happened to me, as the B.B. Says (p418) - because being a terrible drunk then somehow getting into recovery brings me a better life than I could have imagined. As I heard someone say once, it's a "peculiar gift."
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Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 154
It's hard to say. Because whatever I used to tell myself was positive was just me rationalizing my drinking when I knew I shouldn't be doing it. And all of those things could have been experienced sober. However, almost all of my poor decisions in life can be traced back to alcohol and wouldn't have happened sober.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
I'm not sure if I'll articulate this accurately, but if my drinking had never become deadly, I probably wouldn't have stopped.
I'd plug along, drinking daily, probably getting tanked on weekends. I'd be bloated, fat, out of shape. I'd have high blood pressure, probably digestive issues. I'd have anxiety and depression that I probably wouldn't associate to my drinking so I'd probably be on meds for that....that won't work but I don't know that mixing booze and psych meds renders them useless.
Yeah, my life isn't falling apart, but I probably have fatty liver disease and scare tissue on my liver...pre-cirrhosis. But hey, I'm not an alcoholic, my life isn't unmanageable. I'd question my drinking, but probably not for long because, well, I'm meeting my friends at the bar and they all drink, but aren't 'alcoholic' either so we protect each other.
So, yes the positive is that my life in reality got so lethal I had to quit, die, or kill someone else. And I get to be healthy and learn how to deal with life sober.
A lot of people don't drink. But many, and mean MANY, drink quite heavily and spend a lot of time rationalizing that they don't have a problem...meanwhile their quality of life sucks.....and deep down they know it. Which causes cognitive dissonance, which causes depression.
No thanks.
I'd plug along, drinking daily, probably getting tanked on weekends. I'd be bloated, fat, out of shape. I'd have high blood pressure, probably digestive issues. I'd have anxiety and depression that I probably wouldn't associate to my drinking so I'd probably be on meds for that....that won't work but I don't know that mixing booze and psych meds renders them useless.
Yeah, my life isn't falling apart, but I probably have fatty liver disease and scare tissue on my liver...pre-cirrhosis. But hey, I'm not an alcoholic, my life isn't unmanageable. I'd question my drinking, but probably not for long because, well, I'm meeting my friends at the bar and they all drink, but aren't 'alcoholic' either so we protect each other.
So, yes the positive is that my life in reality got so lethal I had to quit, die, or kill someone else. And I get to be healthy and learn how to deal with life sober.
A lot of people don't drink. But many, and mean MANY, drink quite heavily and spend a lot of time rationalizing that they don't have a problem...meanwhile their quality of life sucks.....and deep down they know it. Which causes cognitive dissonance, which causes depression.
No thanks.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,423
Originally Posted by Bottletop
Appreciation. Empathy. Self development.
Plus alot of good memories from the past before it started unravelling.
Plus alot of good memories from the past before it started unravelling.
2/2016
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 582
Originally Posted by charliesworld
...This last one last week was just a day but still left me feeling terrible, guilt stricken and questioning my place in the world yet again. I feel like a failure and ending it all is something I think about frequently (although because I have family would never act on).
.
.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Phoenix
Posts: 1,189
The only positive thing that came from my last drink is that it made me realize I don't want it anymore.
I would have to question if using alcohol was really fun...ever. Even in the beginning, I made stupid choices while drinking, got sick from hangovers, and spent way too much money.
I'm glad that my last drink proved to me that it was time to let go of the mirage.
I would have to question if using alcohol was really fun...ever. Even in the beginning, I made stupid choices while drinking, got sick from hangovers, and spent way too much money.
I'm glad that my last drink proved to me that it was time to let go of the mirage.
Re-Tread
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Meditation
Posts: 1,300
I have had a lot of positives from drinking. Lots of great times alone or with friends. Wonderful trips. If it was not for drinking my wife and I would have never been together. My children whom I love dearly would not be here. I wouldnt be enjoying life sober so much if not for drinking.
In the end the negatives become too great for me. Thinking of suicide like yourself. Health problems. Money problems. Social problems. Legal issues. And drinking just because but not even enjoying it. Until eventually my whole life will center around alcohol and altering my perception of reality.
Its not worth it.
In the end the negatives become too great for me. Thinking of suicide like yourself. Health problems. Money problems. Social problems. Legal issues. And drinking just because but not even enjoying it. Until eventually my whole life will center around alcohol and altering my perception of reality.
Its not worth it.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 1,312
Sure. I married my drinking buddy and had two great children with him.
But now my marriage is falling apart, my children have witnessed too much drinking and bad decision making and are living in a very tense, angry household. I hope they aren’t too far gone and don’t follow in our drinking footsteps and that we haven’t caused co-dependent characteristics in our children.
Way more negatives than positives (except for my children!) in drinking, IMO.
But now my marriage is falling apart, my children have witnessed too much drinking and bad decision making and are living in a very tense, angry household. I hope they aren’t too far gone and don’t follow in our drinking footsteps and that we haven’t caused co-dependent characteristics in our children.
Way more negatives than positives (except for my children!) in drinking, IMO.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,837
I don't really think I had good experiences with alcohol. I don't remember much fun past the age of 18. I was scared, mentally ill and used alcohol to cope, which causes more illness.
I would say that, although this last year in recovery has been one of the toughest of my life, there have been moments of real beauty. The realsation of what life can be......what I can be, is having a profound affect on me. As is working the steps.
It sounds like you are struggling. Can you get more support? I found counselling and a good doctor invaluable. Maybe it's time to reach out more? xx
I would say that, although this last year in recovery has been one of the toughest of my life, there have been moments of real beauty. The realsation of what life can be......what I can be, is having a profound affect on me. As is working the steps.
It sounds like you are struggling. Can you get more support? I found counselling and a good doctor invaluable. Maybe it's time to reach out more? xx
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