chiquen81

I live in an expensive area and I need to find a roommate. My other roommate moved out since she relocated for work. I posted my ad and it has been out there for 4 months. It has been a grueling search. I am not even in my 20s anymore, but it is really difficult to find someone who wants to live in an alcohol-free/drug-free (pot) environment. I've had people actually back out because of this. I put it in my ad to be clear, and got no responses. Then, I removed it and started to get more responses then later to speak with them and say that they want the freedom to be able to drink in their own home. (understandable)

It's almost like I can't tell if I am attracting drinkers or if just everyone in this city drinks for a hobby. Also, drinking at home alone isn't healthy and I used to do it so maybe that isn't the right person anyway. I can't tell you how many emails I get that say "I like to have a glass of wine or two and watch netflix". That is exactly what I am trying to get away from... because for me it's the whole bottle and netflix. (really? you have ONE glass and watch netflix? who does that HA)

Anyway, just had to rant. I posted on soberroommates.com and that was absolutely a strange site and no help. It's just really hard to find fully sober people out there and I start to get mad that my abnormality is costing me huge amounts of money.

kevlarsjal2

Hi chiquen!

I'm living in a party city kind of and it isn't easy to find sober roommates here either. Personally I just tell them I would like no alcohol to be used / stored in the shared areas. What they do in their room (as long as it's legal) is their business. So if they want to have a beer or wine after work, they can do so in their room and that way I don't really notice it anyway.

Dee74

I hope you find a like minded roommate soon Chiquen

D

Gilmer

Have you considered putting word out at churches? Many denominations have an alcohol-free lifestyle.

wildflower70

Hey there,

Are you in a college town? I know that a lot of college students are known for parting, but I found a recent graduate who is working on her PH-D and wants to be away from the party lifestyle.

Maybe reach out to any universities in the area, or post signs on the campuses. I found an amazing roommate who could care less about ever having any booze.

It has actually helped me stay sober!!

Good luck

Gerard52

Seems quite restrictive why not just get a roommate that doesn't drink too much.

Also if you find a non drinking room mate and relapse not so fair on them.

Gottalife

I lived on my own for a while which was quite good for me. I had an alcohol free home. Then I got a bigger place near the beach. With my name on the lease I could say who could or could not live there. I interviewed some potential flat mates and found one who seems to have a lot of interests in his life other than alcohol. I didn't impose any rules on him because he didn't have the problem. I think he might have had an occassional beer, but was never a problem, never a drunk. I won't tolerate drunks.

I think I can have control over the type of people I associate with to the extent that I can select who I wish to associate with, but I have no right to try and control or restrict their personal and legal pleasures, or to expect them to modify their reasonable behaviour on my account.

If you were in AA you could possibly try a recover(ing) alcoholic which might sound ideal. I've tried that too. It's a lot more lively than a normal person who likes and occasional drink.