Mummyto2

I need to stop this behaviour it's out of control

DreamCatcher17

Welcome back!
What type of recovery plan do you have?
Meetings?
Support system/group?

Mummyto2

Thanks, Just on here and online meetings

doggonecarl

It's not enough, it seems. And you know it. A couple days ago you wrote:

Did you not identify what you hadn't tried? Or could you not muster up the courage to try them?

This is a fight for your life. Put as much effort into getting sober as you are putting into getting drunk.

Mummyto2

Yes thanks

doggonecarl

What happened with the doctor visit?

Mummyto2

Went and he gave me more tablets, I can see a pattern keep occurring, went out the other night late and can't even remember where I went, feel disgusted with myself

aasharon90

Were you honest in talking to your
doctor about your drinking problem?

Did you tell him you need help
because you cant stay stopped
drinking?

You have an addiction to alcohol
and you cant get off the rollercoaster
ride of insanity?

Are the tablets prescribed to you
narcotic or habit forming?

Mummyto2

I probably wasn't that honest to the doctor, there tablets to stop cravings

AnvilheadII

it sounds like you continue to give yourself permission to drink.....or conversely have not made the 100% commitment to not drink again under any circumstances, PERIOD.

you mention that you "went out" - was this an event or outing that you knew would involve alcohol? there are a lot of things we can do, choices we can make, that help to protect and defend our sobriety. but we have to place VALUE on that sobriety, treasure it, hold it near and dear and defend it all costs. booze doesn't just fall from the ceiling and into our glass........and that glass never touches our lips unless we bend our arm at the elbow, or fall forward to drink from the straw.

now would be a good time to get serious.....more serious than you have ever been. fearless. become willing to do WHATEVER IT TAKES..........

Mummyto2

Yes thank you your right, I don't know where I went, probably looking for booze, I can't remember

AnvilheadII

that's scary stuff......isn't it?
i promise if you never drink again you will never have nights like that again.
freedom.
embrace it.

Mummyto2

Yes I don't want to drink ever again, and just be happy

Anna

The two things go together. Stop drinking completely and you will be happy...and safe. Going out and having no memory of the evening is very scary.

I hope you add something to your recovery plan today that will help you to stay sober. Have faith that you can do this!

wildflower70

Hi Mummy,

That is a very scary situation. This time (my very last time) I chose to change everything about my habits.

No going out, dating, social events ect.....

These are things that have triggered me in the past.

I plan all of my free time around sober gatherings or I stay home.

It feels boring at times....but I'm happier than I've been in a long time!!

Please don't beat yourself up, you can do this!

Mummyto2

Thank you

soupcon

Just don't drink today. Stay on SR as much as possible. Don't worry about yesterday, don't worry about tomorrow. We have all been there at one time. Before you know it you will string a longer period of sobriety together. Don't keep liquor in the house and don't go anywhere liquor is served. You can do this!

Mummyto2

Thanks, yes I am indoors watching the World Cup, trying not to think to much

lessgravity

Mum, sad to see you here again. We came on together a few months back. I fell of since then - but that was for the last time.

You need to do this for more than just yourself, like me. You have to quit, unless you want to lose so much. There's only so much time and luck each of us gets. Hope you can find the way, it's in you.

Mummyto2

Thanks, yes I have to do this, I am fed up of going around and around, need to forget guilt and shame and stay sober