rich27

Hey, I'm on day 10 but can't seem to make it beyond two weekends without the urge or invitations to go out getting the best of me.

I'm doing Daytox but the distance to commute is getting to be more of a hassle, I know I have to get away from this kind of thinking.

Perhaps, I can go hiking this weekend and do some Daytox classes. Rewards for accomplishments used to be a few at the pub then a 6 pack for home.

Drinking has always been part of my life so how does one get out of this mindset that drinking is a must on weekends?

DreamCatcher17

Yes, you most certainly can stay sober this weekend.
1. Don't buy Alcohol then you won't consume it.

Sounds like a great idea to go hiking

It takes time to change habits. You just keep going, trying new things, reading, cleaning, walking, TV, come here, journaling, music... Etc..

You will get into a grove of your new found SOBER life

doggonecarl

First off, you stop entertaining the idea of drinking.

Second, find sober activities.

Third, when you get invited out to drink, you say, "No, thanks."

Mango212

Prayer is powerful. Whether you believe in it or not. Whether you pray to God, Universe, Great Spirit or the tree outside your window.

Prayer isn't so much "think about something out loud" as it's letting the heart be felt. "Help!" and "Thank you." can be life changing prayers, one moment at a time.

Ever pray for another drink? Maybe change the direction of the prayers.

TheSoberDude

Cutting old habits is not easy. You have allowed alcohol to be a part of your routine. Drinking has become as much of as a habit, as brushing your teeth before bed or taking a shower in the morning.

Your brain is wired to do that. You have to re-wire your brain to pick up new habits that are healthy for you. I think any alcoholic on here can contest...it does get easier with time. The initial stages of changing your behavior can be a daunting task. Your brain is telling you that you NEED it, but mental strength is a a huge piece of the game. Quitting isn’t easy, that’s why many people relapse over and over again.

Alcohol is a depressant, and I truly believe most people use it because they have some sort of stress, depression, anxiety, or other disorder that fills their emotional void. No matter how large or small that emotional void may be...it’s still there. We alcoholics love the feeling of being buzzed. We chase it, and we don’t stop because it numbs whatever problem we may be facing in the world.

I will say it again and again. Exercise is so essential for a recovering alcoholic. I’m a huge advocate for several reasons. It decompresses stress, anxiety, and depression. You begin to naturally produce endorphins, which make you become more chipper. You have structure, and it becomes your new habit. You begin to feel and look better, which makes you resent going back, losing all that you have gained, and drinking again.

Alcoholics relapse because they fail to re-wire themselves. They don’t accept the fact that they CAN’T drink. I now look at alcohol as a life threatening allergy. If I drink it, I will die. And that’s exactly what will happen. I will put myself on a path to total destruction and end up falling victim to the bottle.

It’s all about mindset, and staying the course no matter what your brain tells you.

Best of luck!

tekink

It's really hard at first but you just have to avoid all those things you did while drinking, especially at first. It's really best to avoid drinking situations to take the temptation away.

Don't worry, it's not as bad as it sounds! The prospect seemed awful to me at first but these days I have a lot more going on than wasting the day away chasing a buzz.

Snowydelrico

Positive thinking helps.
‘I can make it through this weekend’

You deserve an unshackled life.
Small steps at first lead to massive victories.
You won’t be disappointed once you are free.

Put the time in and get a life back.

Try and make each choice as it comes along the right one.
Don’t let your AV twist the facts.

Good luck
You can make it through this weekend

August252015

I'll add to this bc it is a topic I feel immensely about - I didn't go anywhere that didn't support, encourage, or be neutral to my sobriety for a long time.

What's a long time? For the first 90, I only went out to dinner with my parents (my mom is a recovering alcoholic and my dad is a light drinker, maybe a beer or two with some dinners) and my first out of town trip was with them to our beach house. I mostly enjoyed the change of scenery close to home.

My first real out of town trip was with my now husband (also in recovery) was at 9 mo sober.

My first party was 14 mo. My first wedding was at 17....

None of this was done out of fear. It was done because I carefully constructed my new world in recovery.

Period.

So, my long winded suggestion: don't go. Then find other things to do.

Up to you- a wonderful thing about being sober is we get to truly choose what we do, when and where, and with whom.

ProfessorD

To answer your question: YES!

tomsteve

it was a part of every aspect of my life,too. it was the solution to everything and everything had to involve alcohol.
to get out of that mindset i had to realize alcohol wasnt cuttin it any more. it wasnt helping and the giggles were gone. i had to realize and accept my thinking was delusional, irrational, and insane.
then i committed to going to any lengths for victory over alcohol- no matter how much of a hassle that involved.

lessgravity

What's up Rich? Made plans to make it through yet?

rich27

Hi, all great suggestions and excellent advice.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do on Friday night yet, but Saturday I'm planning on hiking Quarry Rock (if it stops raining) and Sunday I'll attend some Daytox classes then go to bingo with a friend in the evening.

August252015

I would make filling Friday FIRST/NOW a priority: it will start your weekend in the right or wrong direction it seems to me. Good for planning the rest of the weekend (and if you are like me, make yourself KEEP the plans!) but locking down a sober Fri plan would up the ante in the right direction.

You can do it.

january161992

once i was regularly attending (AA) meetings ... i never thought about drinking again

not trying to be a dick

just my experience

rich27

daytox classes are a lot like topic AA meetings