Desperate for help
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 1
Desperate for help
My name is Lee and I am looking for any advice as I feel so lost at the moment.
My fiancé and I are currently separated due to his alcohol addiction. He drinks daily, the average being 12 full strength beers, he can drink up to a whole case on a weekend. Not a day goes by without drinking anymore. When he is sober, he is intelligent, loving and soft spoken. When he drinks, he calls me names and is arrogant towards me. He has been rude to me infront of my friends, torn up my front lawn with his car and yelled at me until I had an anxiety attack and was petrified of him and then he told me I was just being precious.
He manages to hold down a job although I am not really sure how and one of his sons who is 13 no longer wants to visit him because of the drinking. He kept telling me he would limit himself but this never lasts and before long, sometime only the following day, he's drinking to extreme again.
I would love some advice on what to do. I didn't grow up in an alcohol fueled environment and I don't drink myself.
Thank you in advance
Lee
My fiancé and I are currently separated due to his alcohol addiction. He drinks daily, the average being 12 full strength beers, he can drink up to a whole case on a weekend. Not a day goes by without drinking anymore. When he is sober, he is intelligent, loving and soft spoken. When he drinks, he calls me names and is arrogant towards me. He has been rude to me infront of my friends, torn up my front lawn with his car and yelled at me until I had an anxiety attack and was petrified of him and then he told me I was just being precious.
He manages to hold down a job although I am not really sure how and one of his sons who is 13 no longer wants to visit him because of the drinking. He kept telling me he would limit himself but this never lasts and before long, sometime only the following day, he's drinking to extreme again.
I would love some advice on what to do. I didn't grow up in an alcohol fueled environment and I don't drink myself.
Thank you in advance
Lee
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Sorry for what brings you here Lee.
There is nothing you can do to change his drinking while he still wants to drink. Nothing at all. It may seem harsh, but it's the truth. Thank goodness you seperate before getting married and things got a whole lot more complicated.
As far as focussing on your own healing from this situation, AlAnon might be a good place to start. There is also a fantastic Friends and Family subforum on this site where you will find a very supporting community of folk who understand your experiences and who can offer some great suggestions.
BB
There is nothing you can do to change his drinking while he still wants to drink. Nothing at all. It may seem harsh, but it's the truth. Thank goodness you seperate before getting married and things got a whole lot more complicated.
As far as focussing on your own healing from this situation, AlAnon might be a good place to start. There is also a fantastic Friends and Family subforum on this site where you will find a very supporting community of folk who understand your experiences and who can offer some great suggestions.
BB
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
