Worst thing you’ve done while drunk or high
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Join Date: May 2018
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Worst thing you’ve done while drunk or high
Is anyone willing to share their story? I couldn’t sleep last night because I had anxiety and racing thoughts just remembering all the terrible stuff I’ve done when I’ve been drinking. I don’t know why, but hearing stories from others makes me feel not alone. It makes me feel like other people have messed up too. It makes my shame and anxiety less crippling. I know asking people to admit to their worst drunk story might be a little invasive, so I understand if you don’t want to share. But if you’re in a good enough place in your mind & recovery, and you’re willing to share, I would be very grateful.
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1,981
We can't change the past nor can predict the future, but you do have control over what you are doing now.
Making the most of every day, staying sober, and having a positive attitude to be the best you that you can be is really the way to go.
Making the most of every day, staying sober, and having a positive attitude to be the best you that you can be is really the way to go.
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Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 322
Surprisingly i had quite a lot of self-control when very drunk. (probably didn't look like it from a sober perspective.
The only times i have truly "lost my head" was on copious amounts of Vodka and beer and that was a few times in my life.
But my WORST situations are probably combinations of vodka and very aggressive yelling, swearing or very hostile verbal behaviour to people within my circle of friends or previous GF's. Id look them in the eye and say " i *****ing hate you"
I then started to notice that alcohol was not only affecting me whilst under it, it actually started to change me when i was sober for the day.
I had strange thoughts, i was started to look at homeless people and alcoholics and think " at least they can drink all their life".
My moral values were also starting to take a hit. I nearly cheated on my ex gf twice whilst being absolutely blind. When i say nearly i literally mean i had to walk away from a potential one-night stand. I turned around and walked the other direction when she asked me " So, where is your hotel?" - That's what i meant that i still had some sort of self-control over myself.
In all i just stopped caring about anything.
The only times i have truly "lost my head" was on copious amounts of Vodka and beer and that was a few times in my life.
But my WORST situations are probably combinations of vodka and very aggressive yelling, swearing or very hostile verbal behaviour to people within my circle of friends or previous GF's. Id look them in the eye and say " i *****ing hate you"
I then started to notice that alcohol was not only affecting me whilst under it, it actually started to change me when i was sober for the day.
I had strange thoughts, i was started to look at homeless people and alcoholics and think " at least they can drink all their life".
My moral values were also starting to take a hit. I nearly cheated on my ex gf twice whilst being absolutely blind. When i say nearly i literally mean i had to walk away from a potential one-night stand. I turned around and walked the other direction when she asked me " So, where is your hotel?" - That's what i meant that i still had some sort of self-control over myself.
In all i just stopped caring about anything.
I would say that my DUI was the worst thing since people could have died. Being a mean drunk to so many people still bothers me. I lie and manipulate too , mainly for the purpose of feeding my addiction, not out of malice. The rest of my shame comes from throwing my life away. Many of my worst nights are a little foggy.
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Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 274
Wastinglife, that is my story, too! Only that I had 2 DUIs. Spent January in jail. Yes fortunately I did not kill anyone. The meth addicts in jail told me that I was a creep as their kids are on the streets. Shame! They raised kids while on meth. Yes I regret what I did, and I also regret saying hurtful things to people that I care about, as well as the years lost in stupor. But we are still here, and there IS hope! I am not sure if this thread is constructive but just saying that we are not alone. In my early alcoholism I woke up at a friend's house and my then boyfriend took me home. I said "at least I did not barf in the hot tub" he said "actually you did". I was mortified and sent the friend a bunch of flowers and an apology note. Never again!
I'm not really a fan of these types of threads, mostly due to the fact that we cannot change what we've done. I think it's much more constructive to focus on what we can do today so that none of those kinds of "bad"things ever happen again. I've done plenty of things that were immoral, illegal or downright despicable when I was drunk - but if I don't drink today then none of them are even a possibility.
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Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 322
I'm not really a fan of these types of threads, mostly due to the fact that we cannot change what we've done. I think it's much more constructive to focus on what we can do today so that none of those kinds of "bad"things ever happen again. I've done plenty of things that were immoral, illegal or downright despicable when I was drunk - but if I don't drink today then none of them are even a possibility.
I reflected quite abit on what I wrote.
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Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 379
Not proud of this at all. But I am sharing.
Me and a friend went out to an 80's club a few years ago. We were celebrating a new contract and some new fortune. It started with a few beers and quickly led into the harder stuff.
Around 11pm we were wasted. My friend was lying on the dancefloor doing starfish shapes on the floor and I was outside puking. Shortly after we both purchased 2 bottles of expensive champaign and left. We drank them on the way home as we walked. Acting like complete dicks.
Everyone we walked passed we were trying to fight. Very cocky, very big headed. I'm lucky we didn't get beat up. We passed lots of clubs and bars and I suggested before we go home we should go into Ministry of Sound.
The bouncers stopped us instantly. Too drunk. But we got angry. So we tried to fight them. One of them picked me up and literally threw me. I got angry and started throwing bricks at the bouncer.
I don't remember what happened but me and my mate started to fight each other and we got into a brawl. No idea what it was about I remember we hit each other a few times then got up and started walking home laughing.
Outside our apartments a taxi driver was dropping somebody off. We walked up to him and asked him how his night was going. My friend tried to open his door and he got mad. So we ended up arguing with the taxi driver. We had no intention of causing harm, we were just overly confident because of the alcohol and after the taxi driver got mad the mood switched.
One of us, and I can't remember who, punched the taxi driver and tried to grab his money bag. We were c**ts. We wasn't short of money, or even violent people, but in this instance we were acting like animals. Just because.
The taxi driver managed to get away. But he came back with about 4 other cars all of them trying to run us over. If they would have hit us we'd be dead for sure. We managed to escape.
Woke up the next morning feeling so awful. That's the worst, when you remember how awful the night was.
And that's the crazy life of an alcoholic. I have so many other stories (although not as bad as this one). I was a bit of a b****d when drunk and thought I was a bit of a jack the lad.
Me and a friend went out to an 80's club a few years ago. We were celebrating a new contract and some new fortune. It started with a few beers and quickly led into the harder stuff.
Around 11pm we were wasted. My friend was lying on the dancefloor doing starfish shapes on the floor and I was outside puking. Shortly after we both purchased 2 bottles of expensive champaign and left. We drank them on the way home as we walked. Acting like complete dicks.
Everyone we walked passed we were trying to fight. Very cocky, very big headed. I'm lucky we didn't get beat up. We passed lots of clubs and bars and I suggested before we go home we should go into Ministry of Sound.
The bouncers stopped us instantly. Too drunk. But we got angry. So we tried to fight them. One of them picked me up and literally threw me. I got angry and started throwing bricks at the bouncer.
I don't remember what happened but me and my mate started to fight each other and we got into a brawl. No idea what it was about I remember we hit each other a few times then got up and started walking home laughing.
Outside our apartments a taxi driver was dropping somebody off. We walked up to him and asked him how his night was going. My friend tried to open his door and he got mad. So we ended up arguing with the taxi driver. We had no intention of causing harm, we were just overly confident because of the alcohol and after the taxi driver got mad the mood switched.
One of us, and I can't remember who, punched the taxi driver and tried to grab his money bag. We were c**ts. We wasn't short of money, or even violent people, but in this instance we were acting like animals. Just because.
The taxi driver managed to get away. But he came back with about 4 other cars all of them trying to run us over. If they would have hit us we'd be dead for sure. We managed to escape.
Woke up the next morning feeling so awful. That's the worst, when you remember how awful the night was.
And that's the crazy life of an alcoholic. I have so many other stories (although not as bad as this one). I was a bit of a b****d when drunk and thought I was a bit of a jack the lad.
Oh, TOO many things to count. I got physically aggressive with friends a couple times. During my early drinking years got in bad physical fights with my then boyfriend.
Ended up in the hospital twice, jail once.
Stole my parents car after they broke up a party and drove black out to a Chinese restaurant
Said COUNTLESS stupid things I didn't mean.
The list goes on. Hooked up with somebody's boyfriend. Probably lots of other things I don't remember.
Ended up in the hospital twice, jail once.
Stole my parents car after they broke up a party and drove black out to a Chinese restaurant
Said COUNTLESS stupid things I didn't mean.
The list goes on. Hooked up with somebody's boyfriend. Probably lots of other things I don't remember.
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: East Coast
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So, so, so many things. Lots of things that embarrass me and make me cringe even today. But the worst is definitely drunk driving. I've never had a DUI, but I've driven drunk a number of times. When I drink, I'm so selfish I risk the lives of other people and myself for a "buzz." Drunk driving violates every principle and value I have when sober. Alcohol makes me a monster.
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Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 175
The worst thing I did when drunk is putting the drink before anything else. My live in girlfriend has no idea that I’ve been getting hammered almost every night for a year with short stretches of sobriety in between. Our relationship has suffered, and I know why but she doesn’t. That’s the worst.
When I did the inventory, I did it with your standard legal pad. I listed all the bad things I had done due to drinking.
At 46 pages I gave up and cried for a while.
All I can do is try and do better now.
At 46 pages I gave up and cried for a while.
All I can do is try and do better now.
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 7
I'm still not over this, since it happened just three months ago. With my bipolar disorder, I've hallucinated before. I currently quit work to deal with my stuff, and my husband is taking care of us financially and has good insurance. I was visiting my parents, and while we were drinking, my dad decides to talk about why he doesn't think it's the government's job to take care of disabled people. I have an uncle I'm close to who is schizophrenic. When I asked what my uncle was supposed to do if his healthcare and assisted living weren't provided, he basically said he didn't care, it's not the government's job. My uncle would literally be on the streets, probably dead by now. I said I wasn't sure how I would have managed my high stress job, after already been hospitalized once. He said "well, it doesn't matter, your husband has good insurance." "Well... what if I wasn't married?" He said I'd just have to deal with it (which is probably true, but I was drunk).
Needless to say, I lost it and started yelling about how I hear voices and how the Hell am I supposed to function at work when I black out or lose time, or have severe panic attacks? What if I had no family to take care of me? Should I just die on the streets somewhere? (Again, I was drunk and probably being sensationalist).
My dad didn't know I had any of those mental health issues, outside of being bipolar. I just feel terribly embarrassed that I told him out of pure drunken rage. I haven't visited my parents since, and I'll feel really ashamed next time I see them (probably next month).
Needless to say, I lost it and started yelling about how I hear voices and how the Hell am I supposed to function at work when I black out or lose time, or have severe panic attacks? What if I had no family to take care of me? Should I just die on the streets somewhere? (Again, I was drunk and probably being sensationalist).
My dad didn't know I had any of those mental health issues, outside of being bipolar. I just feel terribly embarrassed that I told him out of pure drunken rage. I haven't visited my parents since, and I'll feel really ashamed next time I see them (probably next month).
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