Lorij13099

Good Morning!
Mom of 3 boys, 15, 12, 7 . Full time job I've had for 18 years, Fitness Trainer on the side. PTO President at my kids school. Active runner, love books and making people laugh.
From the outside I have it all together.... I do beleive this has been part of the problem. Noone suspects my secret addiction to drinking..... I've drank on and off for 15 years, some times every night, sometimes not for years.
The last year and a half has been a downward spiral. Sneaking and hiding vodka from friends and family. In November, I reached out to friends and my husband, and therapist but still to ashamed to even tell them the ENTIRE truth. I stayed sober for about a month and then fell off the wagon went to 2 or 3 nights drinking until I was blackout, hiding it ... This past weekend I stayed pretty much drunk for 3 days had the shakes and I knew enough was enough. I'm doing great so far and am very hopeful. I meet with my therapist today and am telling him everything.
Look forward to meeting everyone

PalmerSage

Welcome! Our kids are similar ages and I was a secret vodka drinker too. I'm amazed that you were able to stop for years at a time, but it sounds like it finally caught up with you and you've reached the point of just being over it. I'm about 5 months sober now, and that is definitely how it started for me...the double life was just too exhausting and full of misery. Feel free to PM me anytime if you want to talk!

Rar

Welcome Lori. I hope SR can help you stay sober for good. It doesn't sound as if you are a candidate for moderation. Stay close to SR. Read and post as often as you feel. It works. Sometimes when I'm away from the house, I check my phone and just read threads to give me little sobriety boosts. I'm glad you're here.