Dry Drunk Fiance Ended Things. Advice?
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Join Date: May 2018
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Dry Drunk Fiance Ended Things. Advice?
My ex fiance and I were together for 2 years and 7 months. He relapsed once during that time, in the first few months of the relationship due to a fight we had over fidelity. He didn't cheat but it was suspected. Now, two years later our lives became more serious in a professional sense, more hours and commitment to work. He began getting distant, constantly distracted, and easily angered. We began fighting when he was literally no longer providing me with any affection. The fight went back and forth for days over which one of us at which moment was unsure about the relationship. Finally he broke it off explosively and abruptly and made it seem very easy to do so. I was always supportive of his sobriety and encouraged him to join AA and or therapy but he never did. Now he says this is about him and he has to do this, not to wait for him but that I will always be the one for him. It's so confusing and I'm deeply hurt. 2 years of engagement. Wedding planning. Building a life and a home together, only for it dissolve over his sudden passion for emotional sobriety.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
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Hi and welcome thesprings1999 
I'm sorry for your pain.
I think when someone wants to end, no matter what their motivation, there's not much you can do about that.
I think you deserve to find someone who is willing to make that lifelong commitment and I hope you find that person
D
I'm sorry for your pain.
I think when someone wants to end, no matter what their motivation, there's not much you can do about that.
I think you deserve to find someone who is willing to make that lifelong commitment and I hope you find that person
D
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Pacific Coast
Posts: 785
Welcome, thesprings1999, and sorry for your pain, but I have to say that my partner calling me a "dry drunk" wouldn't do much to rekindle any affection I might have lost for her.
In alcoholism recovery a lot of us have to learn the hard way that all we can control is our own side of the street. We learn to take a hard look at our own actions and behavior and how they affect others, rather than focusing so much on how other people's behavior affects us.
Perhaps something that might be appropriate even on the other side of the fence?
Be sure to visit our Friends and Family forum, where I'm sure you'll find plenty of support from people who understand where you're coming from.
In alcoholism recovery a lot of us have to learn the hard way that all we can control is our own side of the street. We learn to take a hard look at our own actions and behavior and how they affect others, rather than focusing so much on how other people's behavior affects us.
Perhaps something that might be appropriate even on the other side of the fence?
Be sure to visit our Friends and Family forum, where I'm sure you'll find plenty of support from people who understand where you're coming from.
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 15
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Hi and welcome thesprings1999
I'm sorry for your pain.
I think when someone wants to end, no matter what their motivation, there's not much you can do about that.
I think you deserve to find someone who is willing to make that lifelong commitment and I hope you find that person
D
I'm sorry for your pain.
I think when someone wants to end, no matter what their motivation, there's not much you can do about that.
I think you deserve to find someone who is willing to make that lifelong commitment and I hope you find that person
D
Thank you
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 15
Originally Posted by Andante
Welcome, thesprings1999, and sorry for your pain, but I have to say that my partner calling me a "dry drunk" wouldn't do much to rekindle any affection I might have lost for her.
In alcoholism recovery a lot of us have to learn the hard way that all we can control is our own side of the street. We learn to take a hard look at our own actions and behavior and how they affect others, rather than focusing so much on how other people's behavior affects us.
Perhaps something that might be appropriate even on the other side of the fence?
Be sure to visit our Friends and Family forum, where I'm sure you'll find plenty of support from people who understand where you're coming from.
In alcoholism recovery a lot of us have to learn the hard way that all we can control is our own side of the street. We learn to take a hard look at our own actions and behavior and how they affect others, rather than focusing so much on how other people's behavior affects us.
Perhaps something that might be appropriate even on the other side of the fence?
Be sure to visit our Friends and Family forum, where I'm sure you'll find plenty of support from people who understand where you're coming from.
Thank you
And I apologize if I have tripped on a principal I wasn't aware of. The term "dry drunk" was presented to me by an AA sponsor I spoke to.
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