Divorce it is!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,780
Divorce it is!
I do not feel up to tons of details today because I'm operating on very little sleep & trying to cover a LOT of bases before I hit the wall.
Enough has been revealed now that I am certain I am done & ready to start the process of filing for divorce.
It's going to be ugly & I was trying very hard to avoid that, but I've gone too far beyond my limits of patience & control now. I can't change the way he chooses to deal with any of this.
One day at a time, one foot in front of the other. Right?
Enough has been revealed now that I am certain I am done & ready to start the process of filing for divorce.
It's going to be ugly & I was trying very hard to avoid that, but I've gone too far beyond my limits of patience & control now. I can't change the way he chooses to deal with any of this.
One day at a time, one foot in front of the other. Right?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,699
Sending you positive energy, good vibes, peaceful Zen, all that stuff through this. (((HUGS)))
Which is exactly what you've already been doing all along. You've already got this!
One day at a time, one foot in front of the other. Right?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,618
I have really been impressed by how much you bring to helping others on this forum. I have no doubt that you will proceed on this difficult journey mindfully, ethically, and with strength.
Divorce really, really sucks, and addiction/mental illness is another layer of awful. BUT it is SO much better on the other side! Your life will be more joyful in ways you probably can't even imagine right now, despite the awful parts. You will become yourself in new and wonderful ways.
Divorce really, really sucks, and addiction/mental illness is another layer of awful. BUT it is SO much better on the other side! Your life will be more joyful in ways you probably can't even imagine right now, despite the awful parts. You will become yourself in new and wonderful ways.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Florida
Posts: 6,780
Thank you ALL.
I've talked with my BFF - you know someone has your back when they answer the phone after midnight.
I've talked with my boss who is also a good friend & she's been super helpful too.
I'm determined to keep my upcoming beach weekend because now I NEED it more than ever but I need to make sure DD is A-ok first. At this point she's unaware of the finality of my decision but we've had many frank conversations over the last almost-year about this being a consideration of mine.
I talked to her in Feb/March about the real possibility of divorce because I wanted to set her mind at ease that no matter how upended the world may seem, I will never make drastic overnight changes that take her off guard unless I have no choice in the matter. (& in that case DD, we're both sitting in the same life raft wondering wtf just happened) I wanted her to feel secure that she won't have to leave her home or school or lose her pets and that if any of that DID become a possibility, she would have warning & time to plan.
She's not dumb or blind & she's not a toddler. She's probably has been living this reality with more acceptance & grace than I have & is thinking, "It's about time!"
I've talked with my BFF - you know someone has your back when they answer the phone after midnight.
I've talked with my boss who is also a good friend & she's been super helpful too.
I'm determined to keep my upcoming beach weekend because now I NEED it more than ever but I need to make sure DD is A-ok first. At this point she's unaware of the finality of my decision but we've had many frank conversations over the last almost-year about this being a consideration of mine.
I talked to her in Feb/March about the real possibility of divorce because I wanted to set her mind at ease that no matter how upended the world may seem, I will never make drastic overnight changes that take her off guard unless I have no choice in the matter. (& in that case DD, we're both sitting in the same life raft wondering wtf just happened) I wanted her to feel secure that she won't have to leave her home or school or lose her pets and that if any of that DID become a possibility, she would have warning & time to plan.
She's not dumb or blind & she's not a toddler. She's probably has been living this reality with more acceptance & grace than I have & is thinking, "It's about time!"
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 497
((Hugs))
It's a difficult decision. I've made it myself and am in holding pattern at the moment. I find your words here to be very strong and inspirational. I hope the process isn't as difficult for you and you find time to have some peace.
It's a difficult decision. I've made it myself and am in holding pattern at the moment. I find your words here to be very strong and inspirational. I hope the process isn't as difficult for you and you find time to have some peace.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Right here, right now!
Posts: 3,424
I am sure you know this, but for me it was a comfort when I realized it for myself.
You have given this your all and seen the harvest of your hard work for a long time now. I am sorry that is not enough for your relationship, but I am glad for you.
I am sorry for one more painful part on top of an already challenging period for you.....but I know there will be more gifts that you will be able to receive with graciousness and openness that you have already demonstrated.
Warm, gentle thoughts your way for tonight and the long weekend.
You have given this your all and seen the harvest of your hard work for a long time now. I am sorry that is not enough for your relationship, but I am glad for you.
I am sorry for one more painful part on top of an already challenging period for you.....but I know there will be more gifts that you will be able to receive with graciousness and openness that you have already demonstrated.
Warm, gentle thoughts your way for tonight and the long weekend.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
