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New Here and On Day 2... Again

Old 05-22-2018, 06:52 AM
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Unhappy New Here and On Day 2... Again

Hello,

I'm new to this forum and hope this post is ok.

I am a 31 year old man who lives among a family and a group of friends who are all capable of socially responsible drinking. I just wish I was. This past weekend, I started drinking I think on Friday and met my friend at the bar Saturday evening before I was going to stop drinking so that I could attend my younger brother's piano recital on Sunday.

Sunday morning arrives and rather than attend Church as I had planned with my mother before heading out for the day and going to the recital in the afternoon, I cancelled because I wasn't feeling well and decided to finish the bottle of whiskey and 6 pk of beer I bought Friday evening.

When it came time for the recital which was 2 cities away, I knew that I was so gone that it would not be safe to drive so I sent the traditional "I'm sick" text that I have used a handful of times to neglect my responsibilities.

I'm so tired of missing out on important moments in my friends' and families' lives. In the past, I've been able to be sober for a couple of months on willpower alone but, that being said, I'm here.

I hope to find something that had been missing in my journey to quit before. I'm not quite sure what yet but a good community of people who understand seems like a great start.

Thank you and I wish you the best today.
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Old 05-22-2018, 12:50 PM
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Welcome Gabe, there is lots of great support material on this site that you can browse and the first thing I would suggest is to start making a recovery plan and you can find info on how to do this in the support section too. The community here is fantastic and everyone has a lot of wisdom and advice to share, SR is indeed and wonderful place to find when sobriety is your goal and the support I have received here has kept me on the right path. Look forward to getting to know you and best of luck. x
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Old 05-22-2018, 12:57 PM
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I am a 31 year old man who lives among a family and a group of friends who are all capable of socially responsible drinking.

Recognizing that I AM different from other people that do NOT have the CONDITION I have regarding how Alcohol affects me when I drink...
Is THE most important factor in me KNOWING I can't drink without playing RUSSIAN ROULETTE with my life.

In the AA Big Book, Bill Wilson learned this from Dr Silkworth. At that time, he was also going thru a Spiritual Transformation thru his involvement with the Oxford Groups of that time. When he met Dr Bob... Dr Bob was involved with the Oxford Groups in a different area, but it wasn't until Bill Wilson explained what he had learned from Dr Silkworth, that Dr Bob came to the understanding that HE had a CONDITION that manifested the effect of Alcohol in him differently than in people that could drink 'safely', and that HE could NOT drink 'safely', even though it 'seemed' natural to him that since he had gotten sober, he 'should' be ok if he 'just had a couple drinks".
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Old 05-22-2018, 01:00 PM
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So many of us know what you describe - sacrificing a good life for the bottle. I've called in "sick" many a time, only to feed the demon again that same night.
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Old 05-22-2018, 01:02 PM
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Welcome Gabe,

I think it's important to remember that recovery involves so much more than stopping drinking. Not drinking is the first step, but then it's a good idea to make changes in your lifestyle to support your recovery. For me, I couldn't be around alcohol at all for many months. I also removed a couple of people from my life who were toxic. Basically, find things that help support your recovery and you will be able to do this!
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Old 05-25-2018, 04:52 AM
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Hello again,

Thank you all for the kind wishes, advice, and suggestions.

I have taken the advice on another thread and power read (I read very slow) through The Easy Way to Stop Drinking. I can see why this book might be unpopular and controversial, however, I can say that it, along with the experiences this past weekend, have helped with destroying any desire I had to drink.

That being said, I am still actively looking into counseling or AA in my area. I go back and forth between the 2 because I'm normally a shy, introverted person. I also have a lot of trouble opening up.

Just wanted to provide a quick update. I know that I am only on day 5 but hey, it's day 5!

Thanks again everyone! Have a great, clean day!
-Gabe
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Old 05-25-2018, 11:57 AM
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Nice work, was wondering how you were.
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Old 05-25-2018, 01:56 PM
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Welcome to the family. I hope our support can help you stay sober for good.
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Old 05-25-2018, 07:55 PM
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Congrats on day 5, gabe! A support community is valuable, and for me SR serves that purpose. Reading the experiences of others makes me feel less alone and keeps me pointed in the right direction. For some, face-to-face is the only way to go; for others, not as much. Don't be afraid to try a variety of methods to reinforce your sobriety, and stick with what works for you.
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Old 05-25-2018, 08:13 PM
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Welcome newguygabe - congrats on day 5

D
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