IÂ’ve been denial, I need help
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 3
IÂ’ve been denial, I need help
Hello,
So I can to the realization that I have a problem this past weekend. I have times when I can drink socially and have a great time with 2-3 drinks and stop and feel fine. Then there are other times when I binge and blackout. On Saturday I was babysitting for a family and once I put the toddler to bed i made the insane decision to start drinking the vodka the parents had in their fridge because I was “bored” after two shots of vodka I decided I needed to drink MORE and started to chug straight from the bottle. By the time the parents arrived I was blackout and can’t remember what happened after that. I learned from the mom that I kept asking several times where she went for dinner with no recollection of the answer and was slurring my speech. I don’t know how I got home. The next morning I woke up to glass everywhere, naked in bed and had a huge lump on my head likely from falling. I feel ashamed and embarrassed. I hate myself.
I’m about to start grad school in the fall and God forbid this behavior continues. HELP! What should I do!?
So I can to the realization that I have a problem this past weekend. I have times when I can drink socially and have a great time with 2-3 drinks and stop and feel fine. Then there are other times when I binge and blackout. On Saturday I was babysitting for a family and once I put the toddler to bed i made the insane decision to start drinking the vodka the parents had in their fridge because I was “bored” after two shots of vodka I decided I needed to drink MORE and started to chug straight from the bottle. By the time the parents arrived I was blackout and can’t remember what happened after that. I learned from the mom that I kept asking several times where she went for dinner with no recollection of the answer and was slurring my speech. I don’t know how I got home. The next morning I woke up to glass everywhere, naked in bed and had a huge lump on my head likely from falling. I feel ashamed and embarrassed. I hate myself.
I’m about to start grad school in the fall and God forbid this behavior continues. HELP! What should I do!?
Welcome to SR, Amazon; very glad that you found us.
You have found a very understanding, supportive and encouraging forum.
Read around the forum, giving special attention to the stickies at the top of the Newcomers and Alcoholism forums. There is a wealth of info there.
I hope that you really work hard on finding sobriety and recovery in the next few months. Grad school is an exciting time and such a gift to your future. Alcohol can really mess with that opportunity and your entire life, actually.
Many have found that a Plan for Recovery was instrumental to their success.
I will post a link to a great SR thread on that topic in a moment.
You have found a very understanding, supportive and encouraging forum.
Read around the forum, giving special attention to the stickies at the top of the Newcomers and Alcoholism forums. There is a wealth of info there.
I hope that you really work hard on finding sobriety and recovery in the next few months. Grad school is an exciting time and such a gift to your future. Alcohol can really mess with that opportunity and your entire life, actually.
Many have found that a Plan for Recovery was instrumental to their success.
I will post a link to a great SR thread on that topic in a moment.
Welcome here, lots of wisdom and support. Start by reading and posting. I've learned so much that has finally aided me in getting sober at 40. Sounds like you are trying to get in control earlier in life - nice work!
How are you feeling today?
How are you feeling today?
Are you ready to quit drinking? For good. I know that as a young person that might sound incomprehensible...like, how will I have fun? How will I socialize? Understand that sobriety isn't a prison sentence. Drinking, on the other hand, is a sentence to a life of misery.
Welcome and I'm glad you found us.
I hope that you decide to stop drinking and that you are ready to do so. I blacked out sometimes at the end of my drinking days and it was so very scary, especially for a woman.
Take a look around here and read and learn and come up with a plan to help you stop drinking and stay sober.
I hope that you decide to stop drinking and that you are ready to do so. I blacked out sometimes at the end of my drinking days and it was so very scary, especially for a woman.
Take a look around here and read and learn and come up with a plan to help you stop drinking and stay sober.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Welcome! I'm glad you are ok.
Maybe until you have some sober time reconsider baby sitting. That's a huge responsibility to look after a small child. I'm not judging, I've done all kinds of crazy stuff while drunk. Just take that very seriously, ok?
Maybe until you have some sober time reconsider baby sitting. That's a huge responsibility to look after a small child. I'm not judging, I've done all kinds of crazy stuff while drunk. Just take that very seriously, ok?
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