Barnabas

Hello I'm Barnabas and I've decided to stop drinking alcohol for good. Today is not day one, I think Monday will be day one.

I'm still drinking a little now but I've decided to stop during the last week or so. I suppose I've being just coming to terms with the decision or welcoming the decision I'm not sure.

Although I'm enjoying it, it's also destroying me an everything around me. I mean enjoying in a strange way. not enjoying as in good but look stupidly comfortable.

I don't know, I came home the other night and my other half wanted me to sleep in the spare room. In that moment she didn't know I really needed a helping hand. But maybe it made me realise I needed a helping hand. I was quite sad the other night as I knew I had done some really bizare crazy self destructive ****. So I googled for something to do with rehab but the one that got back to me was super expensive. I've kind of went mad on spending lately and I have to support her to.

you ever just feel like you want to sleep

SoberLeigh

Welcome toSR, Barnabus; glad you found us.

If alcohol is destroying you and everything around you, it certainly sounds as though now is a very good time to stop drinking,

Many have found that living in recovery is an exponentially better way to live. Why not pour the alcohol out now and start sobriety now.

doggonecarl

Welcome to Sober Recovery. Read around the site. You'll find you aren't alone in your struggle to come to a decision to quit.

I hope you can quit as planned. I drank for ten years quitting "tomorrow." I found that a plan to quit tomorrow was really just a plan to drink today.

Barnabas

Thanks for the welcome. I've got three cigarettes left and then I'm done. I don't care what's left. I know if I keep going when I've no smokes I'll go out looking for more and I'm too tired to do that.

I don't even smoke durning the day but the minute I get home and start on the wine I start chain smoking.

Barnabas

It's true because on Friday I said to her that it was my day one and I meant it. then I start getting all pains and thinking it was either my liver going to explode or my heart......I don't know like pains and trembles in the side of the body. I said that I needed wine and she said it's going to end bad. but I felt like I needed it at the moment.

Dee74

If you're worried about withdrawal, consider seeing a Dr, Barnabas - gotta be better than drinking some more.

D

icewater1961

When I was a medium bad alcoholic I was always quitting tomorrow. Lost the love of my life and went to rehab. Was sober two years. Had a series of relapses and drinking got worse and worse. Completely out of hand and very dangerous. Hit the rock bottom (literally!) and making serious effort now to crawl out of there. Quit NOW. Before you have a series of what they call in AA "not yets". Wife leaves, you end up homeless, trouble with the law, death etc. That may not have happened yet but if you continue drinking it will. Quit today.

least

If alcohol is causing problems with your life and health, it's a good idea to get sober for good. Sober is a better way to live.

DontRemember

And..She is correct. It's already bad and will only get worse the more you drink. Dump your booze now and get on with the suffering for a few days. See a Dr if needed,but "monday" is several glasses of wine(or whatever) away. Why not get it over with now?

BDTL

If you knew how good your body will feel once you detox that crap out of your system, you'd never look back. I use to punish myself with alcohol. Especially at a bad round of golf. I couldn't wait to go home and slam down several tall beers. The next day my head would hurt like hell and my sides felt like the were splitting. It's time to make a stand and be good to yourself. Your wife will appreciate it too....

K66

Seriously... I'm on day 55... 56 in 2 minutes time... and I've never been happier... I lost everything... my apartment... money... the love of my life... my heart still aches for him.. don't spend another minute risking another restless night away from your love in the spare room... I would give anything to hav e him back... you are worth it.. sobriety is worth it.. the loved ones are worth it... but YOU ARE WORTH IT!

Barnabas

it would have been a good idea to dump it out and start there and then. I ended up going out, doing drugs. Came back this morning grabbed a few beers on the way back to try settle down after the drugs binge.

She wasn't happy rightly saying "it's just words" when I apologised. Drank last beer and smoked last ever cigarette of my life a few hours ago. Declared it as last. Then went straight on the water.

it begins.