second dui in a year.. so depressed
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 9
second dui in a year.. so depressed
I hate that im back in the same situation as i was a year ago ive been so depressed and havent got a good night sleep in weeks. i was charged with a wet and reckless back in march of 2017 after heading home from a bar with some a friend and brother of mine and ended up getting pulled over and later plead to a wet and reckless. license was suspended and received 14 days of community labor and 3 month alcohol class. i obtained my license after 90 days and began driving again. fast forward two weeks ago i was pulled over after leaving a bar with the same friend from the last dui i blew over and over and eventually i think the officer got a .11 . the first dui i was in a depressed state because i had broken up with my GF of 10 years which i have a child with who was about 1 years old at the time. 4 months later we got back together and yet again today we have been split for about 6 months. I dont drink habitually i tend to go out on weekends with my brother and 1 friend but now i realized i dont enjoy drinking at all now that i have cut ties with my friend cause he has a serious drinking problem. Ive searched so many 2nd DUI stories that im surprised the DUI keys still work. I have violated my probation in LA county and received my 2nd in a different county. i'm worried i may go to jail for a period of time and lose my job i have. i cant afford a attorney right now cause im stuck paying for a leased car me and my girlfriend were sharing but now dont. i have watched so many videos of DUI sentencing and literally have cried hearing children and young teen and families loosing there life to a drunk driver. This situation has really opened my eyes to what ''could have happened'' i just want to get through this and be a better person i am completely done with alcohol it has ruined my life. Has anyone received a 2nd dui and violated probation doing so? I have had so much support from my family on this matter that i truly in my heart and soul know i can step away from drinking. My friend received 2 DUI in two month and didn't do anything the judge told her to do the for the first one and ended up not going to court for the second one and was issued a bench warrant. She went into court on the 23rd of April and had court on the 27th she plead no contest and received 60 day sentence. A day later on the 28th she was released. I was so surprised it gave me a little faith to me possibly getting the same result but then again she is a women. I just cant afford to lose my job and not be able to pay for the classes and help that i need to get on with my life and on the road of being sober. i literally love this feeling i don't smoke , or do any drugs of any kind. i made a stupid conscious decision that night and don't ever want to put myself in this position ever again. if anyone has any advice please so share
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: East Coast
Posts: 853
Sorry for your situation, and so glad you are on SR! You definitely need to get sober and control the situation before someone gets hurts.
Sounds like you have some resentment against your girlfriend and maybe women in general...
Sounds like you have some resentment against your girlfriend and maybe women in general...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 9
Not exactly. i just tried to move on and found myself trying to meet someone i could talk to and connect with. i work alot so getting off around 10 pm i was drawn to bars to be social with other to try to allow myself to make new friends and eventually move on like she was. Big mistake.
Welcome to SR wiggle. I think the most important thing is that you figure out a way to move forward without drinking alcohol. Sounds like it has caused you a lot of problems, so quitting completely is likely the best solution.
I'm very glad you all got off with no injuries.
Here's the thing: whatever the Court decides is what it decides. You can try to dissect it and predict the future, but really all this fear of the future is doing is keeping you anxious.
If it were me I would throw myself into AA meetings. I would make up my own sign-in sheets and have the AA leader of that day sign that I had been there. I would get a sponsor and I would participate 150% in whatever that sponsor thought I should do. I would definitely not touch a drop of alcohol. Get my head straightened out so when the judge talks to me I could have sincere regret, remorse, and be able to tell him I am on the right path now.
Judges are smart. He/She will be able to read you in two sentences. Be willing and honest. Pay your debt to society.
It's going to be alright, regardless of what happens. I doubt you'll get a lot of time. It will be expensive, as it should be.
One day at a time.
Here's the thing: whatever the Court decides is what it decides. You can try to dissect it and predict the future, but really all this fear of the future is doing is keeping you anxious.
If it were me I would throw myself into AA meetings. I would make up my own sign-in sheets and have the AA leader of that day sign that I had been there. I would get a sponsor and I would participate 150% in whatever that sponsor thought I should do. I would definitely not touch a drop of alcohol. Get my head straightened out so when the judge talks to me I could have sincere regret, remorse, and be able to tell him I am on the right path now.
Judges are smart. He/She will be able to read you in two sentences. Be willing and honest. Pay your debt to society.
It's going to be alright, regardless of what happens. I doubt you'll get a lot of time. It will be expensive, as it should be.
One day at a time.
A lot of law offices will give a free consultation. They can give you advice on how to proceed. Find out how to get with the public defender. You need representation. Two DUIs in a year is dangerous territory in more ways than one. Yes, you should be worried about jail time. You can minimize that by requesting work detail. I worked in the kitchen from 5 AM to 7 PM every day and reduced my time from 30 days to 10. Start going to AA now so you can show the court some regret and change.
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 9
Thankyou for your advice. I honestly appreciate it. It has been tearing me up inside because i know im smarter than what i have done this past year. Its hard to even look in the mirror cause i know i'm selling myself short in my life. I believe everything happens for a reason and I know ill make it through it. I know i don't have a addiction to alcohol and can easily not pick it up again. I appreciate the support and i hope you have a wonderful day
Only a couple hundred or so regular posters. 169,500+/- of them either lurk or aren't here very often.
Regardless, the sentiment is sound. I think those who do well in sobriety are plugged in somewhere and participate somewhere. There is definitely someone always logged on, so shout-outs for help never go unanswered!
If it were me I would throw myself into AA meetings. I would make up my own sign-in sheets and have the AA leader of that day sign that I had been there. I would get a sponsor and I would participate 150% in whatever that sponsor thought I should do. I would definitely not touch a drop of alcohol. Get my head straightened out so when the judge talks to me I could have sincere regret, remorse, and be able to tell him I am on the right path now.
willingness is the key
Only. 2 DUIs? Sorry I got a small chuckle because where I live it seems like very few months there is a story in our local paper about someone being arrested for 5, 6, 7 or more. They are making our laws more strict now, but other places are already very strict.
Welcome to SR, I hope you’ll stick around here for a while. There are good people here who want to help and support each other.
Welcome to SR, I hope you’ll stick around here for a while. There are good people here who want to help and support each other.
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Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
You'll have to pay your dues, but a second DUI is not a life sentence. I'm sure you'll be fine.
You say you know for sure you don't have an alcohol problem, yet you joined and posted on a recovery forum. Think about that for a minute.
You say you know for sure you don't have an alcohol problem, yet you joined and posted on a recovery forum. Think about that for a minute.
Drinking and driving can have life changing consequences.
If you can get a lawyer, do it!
I'd be more concerned about the county you got caught in. LA county is overpopulated and doesn't keep people locked up for non-violent offenses. I know someone who got in all kinds of burglary related trouble and his 120 day sentence was served after 3 days. Orange County is a different story..
Either way, I wish you the best and hope you find the value in leaving alcohol alone.
If you can get a lawyer, do it!
I'd be more concerned about the county you got caught in. LA county is overpopulated and doesn't keep people locked up for non-violent offenses. I know someone who got in all kinds of burglary related trouble and his 120 day sentence was served after 3 days. Orange County is a different story..
Either way, I wish you the best and hope you find the value in leaving alcohol alone.
I know i don't have a addiction to alcohol and can easily not pick it up again.
I'm not beating you up - but I think it's important to acknowledge that your relationship with alcohol has bought you into conflict with the law twice now.
D
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Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 9
I joined because I suffer from crazy anxiety and depression issues in my family. I don’t have really anyone to talk to or ask for advice. What I meant by I’m not addicted simply means I can live without it. I just need to choose my friends better. They’re idea of fun is going to bars. Never once have I went anywhere else other then there with them. It’s a real drag because I enjoy sports and skateboarding.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 9
You are absolutely right and I appreciate your reply. I have almost never picked up alcohol on my own. I don’t get off work and say to myself I’m gonna grab a beer and go home. I literally have one friend I hangout with. Both DUI included that kid. I’ve known him since I was 15 so about 10 years. His idea of fun is going to bars and when he’s not he’s at home drinking. My first dui I blew a .08 my second a .086
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Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 2,966
I joined because I suffer from crazy anxiety and depression issues in my family. I don’t have really anyone to talk to or ask for advice. What I meant by I’m not addicted simply means I can live without it. I just need to choose my friends better. They’re idea of fun is going to bars. Never once have I went anywhere else other then there with them. It’s a real drag because I enjoy sports and skateboarding.
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