killerinstinct

Hi, I was an ex drug addict lost everything to it but by the grace of God jesus saved me and healed me. Life has been one interesting journey, praying the best years of my life are still on the horizon. I am devastated at the moment. Watching a friend slowly kill them selves on cocaine. We have been friends for four years, I quit drugs three years ago but their still using. I have tried everything from being more loving to using seriously violent threats to reach him, prayed to the lord and the rest of it. He’s blocked me from every platform possible. He hates my guts and has no heart for our friendship because I told him to get off the ******* drugs or I’ll **** his drug dealer up and his drug ****** friends too because I was so angry... well that blew up in my face. I said sorry but it’s too late. I tried everything. I am devastated. He was talking about using at work, not paying the rent but buying drugs instead of course I was going to explode, he’s losing it and he’s a hider so no one but God knows how bad it really is. I am devastated. I am his only friend who doesn’t use anymore the rest use I am concerned that my friend will die from drugs use. I’ve seen how bad things get when people don’t stop with other drugs. I wish my friend would not end things like this in so much hate this was the one thing I didn’t want to happen. Why did it have to end this way 😞

OpheliaKatz

Killerinstinct, I'm glad you are sober, good work for staying that way. As for your friend, I think that most of us here would say that if we had any effect on our addict friends and family, we would not all be posting here. Sadly, he can do what he wants with his life... and that includes destroy it. As long as he is drugging he won't be a considerate or reliable person in a relationship of any nature. This is a good place to get support. I'm so sorry you have to experience this.

HardLessons

Hi KI

First congratulations on your sobriety. I wish you the very best concerning your long term recovery.

As far as your friend is concerned, I guess your not part of the his drug using club anymore.

From your direct drug addiction experience, you probably know you cant force him to stop using drugs. No amount of verbal threats will make him stop. If those types of threats would work, trust me I wouldn't be here right now.

He has taken steps to block you from contacting him. Maybe its time to just let him live his life the way he chooses. He's not receptive to your message of sobriety and recovery. Maybe a day will come in the future when he contacts you for help.

Thanks

Ann

I also want to congratulate you on your sobriety and am sorry about your friend.

Sadly, all the love in the world, all the support of good friends, all the begging, pleading, threatening, crying...cannot save our addicted loved ones. If love could save them, not one of us would be here.

You can't help your friend but you can help yourself. Maybe find a meeting of CoDA or Al-anon or Nar-anon and get some support from that side of addiction. We have many here that we call "double winners" as they are recovering from addictions and also recovering from codependency...the processes differ, each offer support for whatever your situation is.

killerinstinct

Hey thanks guys, really appreciate having people to talk to I’ve been getting so upset about it. How do I find the support group for naranon on here?

OpheliaKatz

You mean on the forums?

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ly-alcoholics/

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...tance-abusers/

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...riends-family/

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...riends-family/

Check out the stickies at on the forums too. They are very helpful. Check these out: https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ers-alike.html (The Library - Important Reading For Newcomers and Old Timers Alike)

If you want face-to-face help, you might want to google your nearest Naranon or Alanon in the city where you live. You might also have a local helpline you can call. Note: this is help for you, to help you detach from the situation, not help for the addict. The only way the addict can get help is to voluntarily get help himself. You are also welcome to keep posting on SR.

killerinstinct

Thank you for this. I am really struggling with regret in regards to the way I handled my friends behaviour and how I threatened them with violence to try to get through to them. It is no excuse I never should have talked to them that way.