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I’m back with my tail between my legs

Old 04-19-2018, 10:47 PM
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I’m back with my tail between my legs

I’ve been avoiding SR. I have been actively drinking and tho not soused every day, I am drunk often. And drinking every day. I have been trying hard to manage it, be moderate, show myself I can do it...what a crock. I can’t manage it...the booze manages me.
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Old 04-19-2018, 11:04 PM
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welcome back oregongirlsite

the good thing about a place like SR is - we get it...we understand.

I'm just glad you made it back. Any ideas on what you might do differently this time?
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Old 04-19-2018, 11:09 PM
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Hi, Oregongirl.

Get your tail back up.

SR is the most undjudgemental and understanding place I've ever seen and been part of.

We do know what if feels like and how hard it is.

Stick to us.
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Old 04-19-2018, 11:17 PM
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You can do this, Oregongirlsite! The temptation is always there to try to "drink normally" but once you realize that's a lie, the next step is to get back up on the horse!
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Old 04-20-2018, 01:34 AM
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Welcome back!
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Old 04-20-2018, 02:41 AM
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Originally Posted by Oregongirlsite View Post
I have been trying hard to manage it, be moderate, show myself I can do it...
That's been the pattern. To give in to the obsession, to the addictive voice, with the promise that this time will be different.

So you need to add to your plan. That is, if you have a plan. If not, then create one. One that will account for the cravings. Every one who is sober has gotten past them. You can too.

What else can you do to get and stay sober? Have you rejected a formal program of recovery, like AA? Perhaps it is time to embrace what our addiction fears, and get help.
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Old 04-20-2018, 03:52 AM
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People who can drink normally don't have a voice in their head telling them they can.
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Old 04-20-2018, 04:00 AM
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Originally Posted by Oregongirlsite View Post
I’ve been avoiding SR. I have been actively drinking and tho not soused every day, I am drunk often. And drinking every day. I have been trying hard to manage it, be moderate, show myself I can do it...what a crock. I can’t manage it...the booze manages me.
Welcome back Oregongirl. This would be me. I would have a string of alcohol free days and then relapse, like you thinking I could moderate.. Instead of jumping back in here, I would avoid SR because I was too ashamed and continue to drink. Anyway, it's good you're back. We all understand and most of us have had more than one attempt. I've had to tweak my plan a time or two, so perhaps you need a tweak in your plan also.

We're with you.
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Old 04-20-2018, 05:48 AM
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Oh yeah, that effort I would put into managing my drinking. Ugh. It was awful. And such a time waste for a liquid that is actually poisoning me....even if I'm not drop dead drunk. That world where being 'in control' over alcohol was some kind of victory. Don't miss it.

Welcome back!!
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Old 04-20-2018, 09:34 AM
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Thanks for all the kindness. And encouragement. I guess the one place I can start is to promise to check in here daily. And to remember that I CANNOT manage alcohol...it manages me. I will finish “Under the Influence”. I hear about “a plan”...well, mine has been all about when I can have the next drink. I have much to learn. But I know for certain this is critical and the most important effort I will ever take on. Sending 🤗 hugs and much gratitude.
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Old 04-20-2018, 10:16 AM
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Decide what you want, decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work.

A quote from oil tycoon H. L. Hunt. He wasn't talking about sobriety, but he could have been.

That's what a plan does.
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Old 04-20-2018, 10:56 AM
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Welcome back, and I'm glad you're committing yourself to your recovery.
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Old 04-20-2018, 04:48 PM
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I hear about “a plan”...well, mine has been all about when I can have the next drink. I have much to learn.
there are some really great ideas here

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html (What exactly is a recovery plan?)

D
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Old 04-20-2018, 04:54 PM
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I hope you can develop a plan to keep you sober. To stay sober you have to want to be sober more than you want to drink. Not easy, but simple.
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Old 04-20-2018, 05:15 PM
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I'm so glad you came back, Oregongirl.

I had to do the same thing - prove to myself that there was never any control once the first drink was in my system. I wish I hadn't been such a slow learner. I caused myself so much needless grief. You know the truth now - and you're ready to do this thing. A better life awaits.
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Old 04-20-2018, 05:48 PM
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Welcome back!!
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Old 04-21-2018, 12:37 AM
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Glad you're back OGS.

BB
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Old 04-21-2018, 01:44 AM
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Once we've really internalized one simple truth, our path forward becomes crystal clear: we can't drink, at all. Once that fantasy of control is finally shattered, you can start figuring out how to stay away from even one single drink. Because we know there's no such thing as one or two...and besides, what would be the point?!

I hope your experiment has yielded conclusive proof that you're "one of us." Glad to see you coming back for support and understanding.
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Old 04-21-2018, 04:22 AM
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How are your doing today, Oregongirl? Is your plan beginning to take shape?
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Old 04-21-2018, 03:40 PM
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It’s 3:36 pm my time. Have not had a drink and plan not to. I guess that’s the start of a plan. Thing is, I have always left the door open a crack “just in case”. Just in case the impulse overtakes me. Today I will not take a drink.
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