Something to look forward to
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 394
Something to look forward to
A lot of those reading know I'm not in the best living situation and it really gets me down at times. However, I'm really looking forward to the next 1.5 weeks of bliss. After tomorrow, my soon to be ex-husband is leaving for a guys' trip and I get the house all to myself. The best part? Uninterrupted parenting time with my son.
Less stress means less cravings. No more walking on eggshells and a great incentive to stay sober: my son will be entirely dependent on me and I won't do anything to jeopardize him. I'm trying to be thankful for the little things. Never have I looked forward to being a single parent more than right now.
Less stress means less cravings. No more walking on eggshells and a great incentive to stay sober: my son will be entirely dependent on me and I won't do anything to jeopardize him. I'm trying to be thankful for the little things. Never have I looked forward to being a single parent more than right now.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
I'm so so glad that you're getting some ex-free time and space.
One word of caution though.... our AVs can use MUCH more than stress to make us think drinking is a good idea. Your alcoholism is unlikely to just be a symptom of living with your husband. It will still be there over the next few weeks, and once you split up altogether. Your AV is very likely to just try other new and exciting rationalisations out in your head to get you to take the first drink once your husband is out of your hair. And I have read so many people here in the past where people have fallen for / or are battling with that old AV standard, "Well nobody is here.... They won't know if you have a drink!"
BUT, there is a solution....
1 - recognising the AV rationalisations for what they are
2- post any thoughts of drinking on here and waiting for responses before you take the first drink - it takes the power out of them.
3 - make "I will not drink, no matter what!" your catchphrase (Ie no matter what people, what events, or what feelings occur - because drinking makes things worse for us and those we love in the long term).
On a more cheery note, what do you and your son have planned for the next week or so?
BB
One word of caution though.... our AVs can use MUCH more than stress to make us think drinking is a good idea. Your alcoholism is unlikely to just be a symptom of living with your husband. It will still be there over the next few weeks, and once you split up altogether. Your AV is very likely to just try other new and exciting rationalisations out in your head to get you to take the first drink once your husband is out of your hair. And I have read so many people here in the past where people have fallen for / or are battling with that old AV standard, "Well nobody is here.... They won't know if you have a drink!"
BUT, there is a solution....
1 - recognising the AV rationalisations for what they are
2- post any thoughts of drinking on here and waiting for responses before you take the first drink - it takes the power out of them.
3 - make "I will not drink, no matter what!" your catchphrase (Ie no matter what people, what events, or what feelings occur - because drinking makes things worse for us and those we love in the long term).
On a more cheery note, what do you and your son have planned for the next week or so?
BB
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Florida., USA
Posts: 3,252
Enjoy your mini staycation. It will be a great opportunity to work on your recovery and enhance your relationship with your son. BeryBean has some great advice in looking out for your AV. It's darn sneaky!
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