hummingbird358

I am really not doing well today. Spoke to the interventionist this morning to go over the situation with my son and his girlfriend leaving in less than 2 weeks. The situation just gets harder as time goes on. Even the interventionist said he has no experience in something like this situation.
So, my son applied for a new position at work. He is so excited because he got the job out of 40 applicants. I am unsure when he starts but I bet you it will be the Monday after the girlfriend leaves..... It is also a new position that pays less than what he was making.... I told him via text that I felt he should not be taking a lesser paying job but he talked it over with the girlfriend and he is going to do it..... He will be on his own in 2 weeks now making less money.
The interventionist feels now with the new job he is less likely to commit to going to inpatient. The new position is the only one at his location. The other locations have this position but not in his area so it is a sole position.
The interventionist is now thinking of offering IOP to him with sober living attached but he would have to go through detox and assessment as well and not sure when that would occur.
Her leaving without giving any indication is like getting hit broadside. They are going to the gym together and to the dog park, etc. I plan to ask her if she will at least leave him a note stating why she left. I understand her wanting to leave I do ! However, it is really difficult being so far away over 1500 miles!
I know FMLA is there but it won't protect his new position.
Just so scared.

Anna

I'm sorry this is so stressful for you.

I hope things work out with the interventionist, and I hope you can step back and allow your son and his girlfriend to work things out in the best way for each of them.

hummingbird358

The girlfriend is moving back home which is +1500 miles away. She is done with the relationship.

Anna

Yes, I understand that. But, I hope that she and your son will both do what is the right thing for each of them at this point. The girlfriend has been planning to move for a long time, I think. And, hopefully your son will make the choice to deal with his addiction.

Morning Glory

Many years ago I had to make a choice to protect my newborn granddaughter and her mother. My son was also a couple of thousand miles away. I had to put his girlfriend and daughter on a plane and send them to safety. I was terrified he would harm himself after that, but he made it. I know it's hard to watch addiction do so much harm to our children, but I really feel they have a much better chance by taking responsibility for their own lives and circumstances. I also feel that family connection is important. You can be there for him without picking up the pieces.