Second guessing

Old 03-23-2018, 03:23 PM
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Second guessing

I finally enforced a boundary with my AH ( he knew my boundary, that if he did drugs or stole one more time he’d have to leave) because he stole my medication again and now I’ll have to go 4 days without my meds because he took 4 days worth. I told him he has a week to secure an apartment and move out. Told him I was done with his addiction. I told my mom all this and at first she was supportive then later texts me that “maybe I should cut him some slack” This is the 5th time (that I know about!) he’s stolen from me! I feel so alone! I needed, need support. Second guessing my decision and did I do the right thing.....
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Old 03-23-2018, 04:36 PM
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You are doing the right thing.
I’d kick him out tonight, but that’s me.
Peace.
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Old 03-24-2018, 08:43 AM
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He took medication that you need. That's abuse. I don't know why your mom is okay with you being abused, but I don't think you should listen to her advice.
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Old 03-24-2018, 09:26 AM
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Maybe your mom could take him in. Just sayin.

You did the right thing. Or rather, he did the wrong thing and these are the consequences.
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Old 03-24-2018, 02:27 PM
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You set a boundary. Which your AH clearly understood

He broke that boundary of his own free will

Enforcing that boundary is the right thing to do. If you don’t your boundaries become meaningless. You will also loose more of yourself to his addiction

I was never able to set heathy boundaries. I was finally able to take back my power & stop the madness. Back in June 2017 by telling her I was done. It was as not easy to do. Even several months later it’s still hard.

I wish you all. the best
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Old 03-24-2018, 07:46 PM
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Thank you! The support is so appropriated!
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Old 03-25-2018, 05:56 AM
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I agree with the poster above, stealing medication that you need is abuse. Stealing our money is abuse. Making us think that we are the crazy ones is abuse. Using words that disappoint, instead of actions that truly show intention...is abuse.

Abuse is a deal breaker and these days I cut slack for no abuser. Mama may mean well but she is giving very bad advice. I think you know that.

Leaving the relationship will hurt....staying will hurt more.

I am so very sorry for your pain.
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Old 03-25-2018, 06:30 AM
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He stole your medication and money, which shows you how much he values and respect you, that is, not at all. He has no respect for your well-being. He is also dishonest. All this should be a deal-breaker (well, for me, it is). Please don't make excuses for him because he's an addict... and don't let anyone else do the same. You set a boundary, if you follow your mother's advice, you will only end up shifting your boundaries until you have nothing left for yourself. Boundaries in any relationship are important and healthy.

You did the right thing by giving him a week to leave. Stay strong. You can do this! Stay strong and believe in yourself because you are right.
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Old 03-27-2018, 09:47 AM
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You did the right thing. Many people don't understand addiction. It's best just to follow through w/your actions and not ask opinions. Instead, just ask for support.

Big hugs to you.
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Old 03-27-2018, 12:54 PM
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NEVER give an active addict any slack. Mom just doesn’t understand the severity of it all and sadly you are living it. You are doing the right thing even if it may not feel like it right now.
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