Hawking22

This addiction has taken my soul, and I want it back. I would love to know that I'm not the only one in this darkness and there is a light somewhere.

I'm currently detoxing obviously, but that kindling, man...I didn't think withdrawal could get worse and it really does every time...Im so dehydrated but the more water I drink, the worse i feel. I have no idea how I'm going to make it through work today on zero sleep and massive tremors that my anticonvulsants can't even help. I am such a piece of crap, I can't believe I've done this to myself again.

Thank you for letting me share, SR family ♡

sobersolstice

I get dehydrated if I just drink water early in detox. Something like Pedialyte, electrolyte tablets, or even gatorade (i cut it 1:1 w/ water), are good if you're lips are chapped and have dry skin. I like personally like coconut water because it tastes good, and also has natural electrolytes. Those have helped me, even during physical work days.

Behappy1

I agree with the coconut h20 - I dont like the taste very much, but it does help. Gatorade does too. I would mix 1/2 of both with h20 if it was too much for my stomach. You really need to stay hydrated. I was so dehydrated once from a detox that I ended up in the ER with SEVERE “Charlie horses” or cramping. My entire body was cramping. I was so sick, I couldn’t even keep h20 down and kept throwing up. Also, eat whatever you can keep down. Even if it’s just a few bites of something. I hope you feel better soon!

Nonsensical

You're not the only one in the darkness.
There is a light somewhere.
You know that, that's why you're here.

Flush out those toxins, friend.

Hawking22

Thank you ♡

Zombie79

Last Monday I came home from work and drank a 750ml bottle of gin. I went into work the next morning. I didn't have convulsions but I was in a bit of a haze (possibly still drunk?)
I remember walking down the street, not very fast but I had sweat on my brow, stomach in knots.
At work, still too warm, hands shook trying to pick things up. I feared someone would notice the shake. I hardly are, instead just drinking water and coffee.
On the way home I knew I had to stop. I felt like a total mess of a human being. That was my darkness but this past week I've made the decision to stop and stuck to it and I've felt better for it.
You can escape from this darkness

thomas11

Sounds like you've got a rough road ahead of you for awhile. You can make it. I agree with you in that after I consumed nothing but alcohol for a few days, if I drank water and ate it would make my body do all kinds of weird things. But I forced myself to eat because that's the only way to get back on track.

Anna

There is always hope so stay focused on getting through the day.

If your meds are not managing the tremors, don't hesitate to call your dr or to go to the ER.

wildflower70

I'm wishing you the best, and I have been to the dark place your describing...way too often. Can you take the day off to recuperate?

Just thinking about how bad the withdrawals are is keeping me on the sober train. Hope you feel better soon!

Hawking22

Thank you all so much for the kind words and support...pickes up some coconut water and going to attempt to eat an orange.
I apologize for being so "woe is me", I'm just so ashamed of what I've become. Driving to work and literally just passed an intersection that I stopped in the middle of to puke at 1 in the morning a year ago...when I swore I was done then too.

I don't know how in the world I've gotten so lucky but I'm pressing that luck so hard and I can't allow myself to keep disrespecting and disrupting my environment and fellow humanity.

I'm about to walk into our weekly staff meeting and I'm so terrified they're going to know...

Rar

I apologize for being so "woe is me", I'm just so ashamed of what I've become. No need whatsoever to apologize, Hawking. You are among friends who understand. Post often and let us know how you're doing.