Dave42001

March 17

Daily Reflections

MYSTERIOUS WAYS

. . . out of every season of grief or suffering, when
the hand of God seemed heavy or even unjust, new lessons
for living were learned, new resources of courage were
uncovered, and that finally, inescapably, the conviction
came that God does "move in a mysterious way His wonders
to perform."
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105

After losing my career, family and health, I remained
unconvinced that my way of life needed a second look.
My drinking and other drug use were killing me, but I
had never met a recovering person or an A.A. member. I
thought I was destined to die alone and that I deserved
it. At the peak of my despair, my infant son became
critically ill with a rare disease. Doctors' efforts
to help him proved useless. I redoubled my efforts to
block my feelings, but now the alcohol had stopped
working. I was left staring into God's eyes, begging
for help. My introduction to A.A. came within days,
through an odd series of coincidences, and I have
remained sober ever since. My son lived and his
disease is in remission. The entire episode convinced
me of my powerlessness and the unmanageability of my
life. Today my son and I thank God for his
intervention.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

A. A. also helps us to hang onto sobriety. By having
regular meetings so that we can associate with other
alcoholics who have come through that same door in the
wall, by encouraging us to tell the story of our own
sad experiences with alcohol, and by showing us how to
help other alcoholics. A.A. keeps us sober. Our attitude
toward life changes from one of pride and selfishness to
one of humility and gratitude. Am I going to step back
through that door in the wall to my old helpless,
hopeless, drunken life?

Meditation For The Day

Withdraw into the calm of communion with God. Rest in that
calm and peace. When the soul finds its home of rest in
God, then it is that real life begins. Only when you are
calm and serene can you do good work. Emotional upsets
make you useless. The eternal life is calmness and when a
man enters into that, then he lives as an eternal being.
Calmness is based on complete trust in God. Nothing in
this world can separate you from the love of God.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may wear the world like a loose garment.
I pray that I may keep serene at the center of my being.

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As Bill Sees It

Only God Is Unchanging, p. 76

"Change is the characteristic of all growth. From drinking to
sobriety, from dishonesty to honesty, from conflict to serenity, from
hate to love, from childish independence to adult responsibility--all
this and infinitely more represent change for the better.

"Such changes are accomplished by a belief in and a practice of sound
principles. Here we must needs discard bad or ineffective principles
in favor of good ones that work. Even good principles can sometimes
be displaced by the discovery of still better ones.

"Only God is unchanging; only He has all the truth there is."

Letter, 1966

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Walk in Dry Places

Is it Easy?
Practicing principles
There's no "softer, easier way," we're told. If so, why are we also urged to embrace the slogan "Easy Does it?" Which is right?
Both are right, because they express two different ideas. The softer, easier way doesn't work because it grows out of self-deception and falls short of a thorough working of the program. "Easy Does it" works because it describes an approach to action that is relaxed, confident, and careful.
The person seeking an easier, softer way usually avoids taking some of the steps that are considered necessary in maintaining sobriety. It's a way of trying to win without doing sufficient work. The person following the "Easy Does it" principle pays attention to every detail, but carries on without reasonable haste or excessive loafing.
In a spiritual sense, "Easy Does it" also means letting the Higher Power carry the load. At all times, however, we must continue to make choices and bear responsibility for our actions.
I'll be relaxed and confident while carrying on a full day's activity. There is always time to do things the right way.

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Keep It Simple

Skill to do comes of doing.---Ralph Waldo Emerson
Often, we just want to sit and do nothing. And why not. We go to meetings, work the Twelve Steps, read, make new friends. All this takes energy and means taking risk. Haven't we earned the right to just sit and take it a break from it all? No! In the past, we avoided life. Now we're becoming people of action. We take risk. We're becoming people who get involved in life. We practice caring about people and caring about ourselves. At times, we may complain, but we do what is needed to stay sober. We gain skills by doing. why? We do it to save our lives. How? By trusting. We now trust that our Higher Power and friends will be there for us. They will help us push past our fears. As we practice daily how to stay sober, our skills grow.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, Yours is a spirit of action. Allow me to become skilled at being active.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll work at being active and alive. Maybe I'll start a new friendship or try a new meeting.

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Each Day a New Beginning.

A woman who is loved always has success. --Vicki Baum
Being loved, and knowing that we are loved, assures us of our connection to the world outside of ourselves. It affirms us as participants in the bigger picture. And all of us need to know that we count--that what we say and do matters to others--that we are contributing in an important way.
Often we feel unloved, however. And we search for love. We may have begged for love and still didn't feel it. We have probably become very self-centered in our search. Fortunately, the program helps us to give love to others; the paradox is that love is returned, tenfold.
The wonders of love are many. Love is a healing balm for wounds. And it nurtures, both the one loving and the one loved. Love is an energizer. It spurs us on to successes in work and in play. Love multiplies. If we aren't feeling loved, we can love someone else--and love will visit us, too.
We can help the women in our lives find the successes they deserve. The confidence to tackle new situations is packaged in the gift of love. We need to help one another count.
My love of another is a contributing factor in her success. Her loving gratitude will enhance my own endeavors. I will take a moment, today, with a friend who needs my love.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 5 - HOW IT WORKS

It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal. For when harboring such feeling we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die.

p. 66

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

He spent eighteen years in running away, and then found he didn't have to run. So he started A.A. in Detroit.

Some of the things that used to stop me in my tracks from fear still make me nervous in the anticipation of their doing, but once I kick myself into doing them, nervousness disappears and I enjoy myself. In recent years I have had the happy combination of time and money to travel occasionally. I am apt to get into quite an uproar for a day or two before starting, but I do start, and once started, I have a swell time.

p. 256

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Four - "Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole."

There were, though, a few conservative dissenters among the alcoholics. the wrote the Foundation*, A.A.'s headquarters in New York, wanting to know about this sort of streamlining. They understood that the elders, just to nail things down good, were about to apply to the Foundation for a charter. These few were disturbed and skeptical.

*In 1954, The name of the Alcoholic Foundation, Inc. was changed to the General Service Board of Alcoholics Anonymous, Inc. and the Foundation office is now the General Service Office.

p. 148

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He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the
universe.
--Marcus Aurelius

I have learned what a heart full of gratitude feels like.

If you make yourself a doormat, you will be stepped on.
--American Proverb

The only real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new
landscapes but in having new eyes.
--Marcel Proust

The Way isn't something that can be put into words.
You have to practice before you can understand.
You can't force things, including practice.
Understanding is something that happens naturally.
It's different for everyone.
The main thing is to reduce your desires and quiet your mind.
--Master Hsueh

Within man is the soul of the whole; the wise silence; the universal beauty; to which
every part and every particle is equally related; the eternal One.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

SAINTS

"The saints are the sinners who
keep on going."
-- Robert Louis Stevenson

At times I do not want to carry on; I do not want to fight anymore for
truth and freedom; it seems so much easier to "give up " and agree with
everybody --- but I know, deep inside myself, this is not true.

At times the disease speaks to me and tells me to "give up" and
everything will be okay --- perhaps have one drink, don't rush off to so
many meetings, get what you can when you can! It all sounds so
tempting, but I know that it does not work.

Sobriety works! The struggle and pain to act responsibly in my life is
paying off and it does get better. I am not going to give up. My life is
worth more than a quick fix!

Lord, let me know that true courage is working through the pain.

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"Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you; He shall
never permit the righteous to be moved."
Psalms 55:22

"Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You."
Psalms 56:3

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.
James 4:10

Jesus said, "Love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this, to
lay down one's life for one's friends."
John 15:12-13

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Daily Inspiration

We have been given a treasure of talents which should be accepted with responsibility and gratitude. Lord, may my gifts flourish in great faith and charity so that they may also benefit others.

Love who you are, for who you are, God loves. Lord, help me to never abuse myself with self pity or excess, emotionally or physically, so that I may live my life to the fullest according to Your Will.

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NA Just For Today

True Courage

"Those who make it through these times show a courage not their own."
Basic Text p. 82

Before coming to NA, many of us thought we were brave simply because we had never experienced fear. We had drugged all our feelings, fear among them, until we had convinced ourselves that we were tough, courageous people who wouldn't crack under any circumstances.

But finding our courage in drugs has nothing to do with the way we live our lives today. Clean and in recovery, we are bound to feel frightened at times. When we first realize we are feeling frightened, we may think we are cowards. Were afraid to pick up the phone because the person on the other end might not understand. We're afraid to ask someone to sponsor us because they might say no. We're afraid to look for a job. We're afraid to be honest with our friends. But all of these fears are natural, even healthy. What's not healthy is allowing fear to paralyze us.

When we permit our fear to stop our growth, we will be defeated. True courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the willingness to walk through it.

Just for today: I will be courageous today. When I'm afraid, I'll do what I need to do to grow in recovery.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Love is always open arms. --Leo Buscaglia
There is a story about a boy who left home and dishonored his father by spending a large amount of money on fast and reckless living. When the boy's money ran out, he was faced with the prospect of returning home to face his father, knowing the father had every reason to be disappointed in him. Filled with fear and shame he approached his home, his mind racing with words of apology. Before the boy could say a word, his father rushed to him with open arms and hugged his lost son in joy and love.
Have we done this? Have we found it in our hearts to approve whatever a loved one does, even if we would have wanted something different?
Love like this is the highest kind of love. It finds joy in others no matter what, because it recognizes the freedom of those we love, and doesn't chain them to our own wants. It is the same kind of love God has for us.
Are my arms open today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The reward of friendship is itself. The man who hopes for anything else does not understand what true friendship is.
--Saint Ailred of Rievaulx
The comfort of a true friend in a time of trouble, the strength we sense in being with someone who truly knows us, the affirmation of life that comes with enduring friendships - no other experience is like these. Recovery, once our addictive behaviors end, is mostly through relationships. In this program we are developing a friendship with ourselves, with other men and women, and with our Higher Power.
True friendship happens when we lower our guard and let our feelings show. It happens when we listen without judgment. It accumulates over time in many little experiences with someone. There is friendship in returning to someone when we feel offended or hurt so the relationship can be repaired - and in returning to him when we have been the offender. Sometimes friendship means humility, or accepting our worthiness to be forgiven. The development and deepening of our friendships, with other men, with women, and with ourselves sustains us in recovery.
Today, I will be true in my friendships.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
A woman who is loved always has success. --Vicki Baum
Being loved, and knowing that we are loved, assures us of our connection to the world outside of ourselves. It affirms us as participants in the bigger picture. And all of us need to know that we count--that what we say and do matters to others--that we are contributing in an important way.
Often we feel unloved, however. And we search for love. We may have begged for love and still didn't feel it. We have probably become very self-centered in our search. Fortunately, the program helps us to give love to others; the paradox is that love is returned, tenfold.
The wonders of love are many. Love is a healing balm for wounds. And it nurtures, both the one loving and the one loved. Love is an energizer. It spurs us on to successes in work and in play. Love multiplies. If we aren't feeling loved, we can love someone else--and love will visit us, too.
We can help the women in our lives find the successes they deserve. The confidence to tackle new situations is packaged in the gift of love. We need to help one another count.
My love of another is a contributing factor in her success. Her loving gratitude will enhance my own endeavors. I will take a moment, today, with a friend who needs my love.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Empowering
You can think. You can feel. You can solve your problems. You can take care of yourself.
Those words have often benefited me more than the most profound and elaborate advice.
How easy it is to fall into the trap of doubting others and ourselves.
When someone tells us about a problem, what is our reaction? Do we believe we need to solve it for the person? Do we believe that that persons future rests on our ability to advise him or her? Thats standing on shaky ground - not the stuff of which recovery is made.
When someone is struggling through a feeling, or a morass of feelings, what is our reaction? That the person will never survive that experience? That its not okay for someone to feel? That he or she will never get through this intact?
When a person is faced with the task of assuming responsibility for their life and behaviors, what is our response? That the person cant do that? I must do it myself to save him or her from dissipating into ashes? From crumbling? From failing?
What is our reaction to ourselves when we encounter a problem, a feeling, or when we face the prospect of assuming responsibility for ourselves?
Do we believe in others and ourselves? Do we give power to people - including ourselves - and their abilities? Or do we give the power to the problem, the feeling, or the irresponsibility?
We can learn to check ourselves out. We can learn to think, and consider our response, before we respond. Im sorry youre having that problem. I know you can figure out a solution. Sounds like youve got some feelings going on. I know youll work through them and come out on the other side.
Each of us is responsible for ourselves. That does not mean we dont care. It does not mean a cold, calculated withdrawal of our support from others. It means we learn to love and support people in ways that work. It means we learn to love and support ourselves in ways that work. It means that we connect with friends who love and support us in ways that work.
To believe in people, to believe in each persons inherent ability to think, feel, solve problems, and take care of themselves is a great gift we can give and receive from others.
Today, I will strive to give and receive support that is pure and empowering. I will work at believing in myself and others - and our mutual abilities to be competent at dealing with feelings, solving problems, and taking responsibility for ourselves.


Today I know I have a right to be alive and happy and full of joy. Today I trust that I am where I am supposed to be, and am moving in the right direction. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Cherish Hope

It was a beautiful city in Idaho. The lake that ran alongside the highway was so clear and blue, I pulled the jeep to the roadside just to stop and stare. The air was clear. The city felt light, airy, buoyant. It’s name was hope.

I didn’t stay long. I didn’t need to. But I needed to drive by, drive through, pause for a moment to remember another important power to discover and cherish on our journey. Hope is airy, almost intangible, yet if we don’t have it, we know it. Hope is simple. Clear. Light. Our hearts, our souls, need a good glimpse of it every so often, just to keep us going.

Even those times we can’t have what we want, we can be open to seeing its light shining unexpectedly in another direction, like this small town that caught my eye.

Cherish hope. It adds buoyancy to the spirit, lightness to the day.

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More Language Of Letting Go

Don’t avoid the void

I was sitting at dinner with a group of friends in a restaurant one evening. Everyone but one person was done eating. Feet were shuffling under the table. We were ready to go. One member of the group, an older woman, was picking at her meal. She had ordered dessert, but hadn’t eaten it yet. Instead, she slowly sipped her coffee.

“I don’t eat my dessert until I’ve finished coffee,” she said. when the waiter asked if he could take her plate.

All eyes at the table watched as she took a tiny sip, placed the cup down, and chattered, telling stories and jokes, making meaningless conversation. We watched eagerly as she started to pick her fork up to take a bite of dessert, then sighed quietly as she changed her mind, set the fork down, and began to tell another story.

She was alone, widowed, and her children lived in another state. It was obvious that she was trying to stretch dinner out with her friends as long as she could. She was trying to fill up that empty, silent place we call the void.

There’s a lot of talk in life and in this book about doing, achieving, and going for what we want. There’s much spurring on to activity that shouts, “Yes, I’m alive. And I’m fully and richly living my life the best I can.”

In all the busyness and living, there needs to be mindfulness and careful attention paid to another part of life, too. That part is the repetitive and natural cycle that some people call “the void.”

It’s an empty space in our lives.

The void can be a small space in our lives– lasting a few days or weeks. Or it can go on longer. That relationship has ended. We’re alone. We don’t know what to do next. Or that cycle in our lives has ended– maybe we’ve graduated from school or college, and we don’t know where to go next. Maybe our time as a parent has ended. Maybe someone we loved, a roommate or best friend, who was an important part of our lives has moved away.

Don’t be afraid of the void. Postpone it for a while, if you must. Linger at dinner with friends, refusing to finish your dessert. As dark, cold, and empty as it feels, the void is a friendly place. Its rhythms are slower and often more confusing than other cycles in our lives, but the rhythms of this cycle are still there.

Remember those quiet times in your life, the ones you’ve gone through before, when one cycle has ended and another has not yet begun. Remind yourself when that void comes along that you don’t have to be frightened of it. It’s not the end. It’s only a creative and necessary pause, a cycle of its own, in the cycles and rhythms of life.

God, give me the courage to step into the void in my life with dignity, faith, and a sense of humor. Help me cherish the unknown as much as I enjoy activity and clarity.

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In God’s Care

You have to have a talent for having talent.
~~Ruth Gordon

Each of us brings different gifts along on our journey. We all have a variety of talents We don’t however, always know how to use them. Some people seem to know how to put their talents to good use. Many of us botch them until we get help from God, who gave them to us.

Each of our talents has a purpose. We weren’t given them by accident. We all have talents. And, of course, combinations of talents. But we don’t live up to our potential without God’s direction.

I put my talents in God’s hands so that I can live at full capacity.

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Permission To Feel
Pushing Away Emotions

Throughout our lives, we may experience emotions that disturb or distress us. Often, our first reaction is to push our feelings away. We may say, “I don’t want to think about that right now, I’ll think about it later” and we bury our emotions, deny the validity of our feelings, or distract ourselves with other concerns. But the diverse emotions you experience are neither good nor bad—they are simply a part being human. Choosing not to experience pain, anger, or other intense feelings could cause those feelings to become buried deep into your physical body. There, they may linger unresolved and unable to emerge, even as they affect the way you experience the world. Allowing yourself to experience all of your emotions rather than push the more painful ones away can help you come to terms with your feelings so you can experience them and then move on.

It is possible to bring forth the old feelings you have pushed aside and experience them in a safe and enriching way. It may sound silly to set aside time to feel your old wounds that you haven’t dealt with, but this can be a very beneficial healing experience. Find a safel place and pick a time when you can be alone. Make sure that you feel secure and comfortable in your surroundings. Bring to mind the circumstances that originally triggered the emotions you’ve been pushing away. You may need to revisit these circumstances by reading relevant entries in your journal or using visualization to relive your past. Once you have triggered your long-denied emotions, let yourself feel your feelings, and try not to judge your reactions. Cry or sound your emotions if you need to, and don’t block the flow of your feelings. Allow any thoughts that are connected to your emotions to surface. As you release the feelings you have pushed inside of you, you will find yourself healing from ! the experience associated with these emotions.

When you deal with your feelings directly, they can move through you rather than staying stopped up in your body as emotional blocks that can sometimes turn into disease. Acknowledging your emotions, instead of pushing them away, allows you to stay emotionally healthy and in touch with your feelings. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

“Lead us not into temptation,” we pray, for we know with certainty that temptation lurks around the corner. Temptation is cunning, baffling, powerful — and patient: we never know when it will catch us with our guard down. Temptation could come in the siren song of a four-color advertisement, the fragment of a half-remembered song or, more obviously, in the direct urgings of another person. We must remain forever vigilant, remembering that the first drink gets us drunk, that the first obsessive bite will likely trigger an overeating orgy, that the first roll of the dice could well destroy our lives. Am I aware of my number one priority?

Today I Pray

God, lead me out of temptation — whether it is the jolly-but-alcoholic abandon of my peers at a special-occasion celebration, the pressure from my friends to “get in the spirit” of a party, the familiar aura of an apartment where joints are passed around, the sound of rattling dice, the smell of a bakery. May I know the limits of my resistance and stay well within them. May my surrender to the will of God give a whole new meaning to that old phrase, “Get in the spirit.”

Today I Will Remember

Get in the spirit.

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One More Day

Time is lost when we have not lived a full of human life, time enriched by experience, creative endeavor, enjoyment, and suffering.
– Dietrich Bonhoeffer

“I’ll never make it through today!” While we all may have had that thought from time to time, we did live through that day to rise the next morning and greet the new day. Time can go by very slowly when we are thinking of one but ourselves. Sometimes we can feel overwhelmed by fear of an uncertain future. We may even feel that we have been deserted by our friends and family in a time of need.

When overwhelmed with these helpless feelings, we can turn to our Higher Power for comfort and understanding. Knowing we don’t have to work through the details of our lives alone not only comforts us, it fills our minutes and days with positive thoughts and actions.

My Higher Power lends me strength to carry me through.

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One Day At A Time

PAIN AND PRETENDING

"To live is to suffer,
to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering."
Friedrich Nietzsche

I love to walk in the woods. The silent serenity of shadowed sunlight; the soft bounce of scattered needles under my feet; and the cool, clear air breathe peace into my soul.

I’ve long been fascinated by “nurse logs” – those aged, fallen pines who serve as fertile sustenance for younger, healthy trees.

When I look back at my life I see so much death. I see wasted years of hiding, lying, pretending -- years of wrapping myself in my sickness. I have held my disease close to me. At first it seemed to bring safety, but I came to find that it was actually a death shroud. I wondered how any good could ever come from my years of pain.

After entering Recovery and working the Program, I have come to see that Nothing Is Wasted. Every sorrow, every injury, and every failure have brought me to this fruitful forest of New Life. Had I never suffered, I would never have found the Serenity that comes from choosing Gratitude. Had my life been easy, I would not have the appreciation I have gained for each new day. No one values safety, peace, and growth quite so profoundly as do those who have lived without them for so very long.

As I keep my mind, heart, and perspective focused on God, growth, and life, I find that my pain has become a nurse log; rich with all that is needed to bring life where once was only death.

One day at a time . . .
I will remember that nothing is wasted. I will choose to appreciate the pain and wisdom of the God-given nurse log which feeds me with hope and peace.
Lisa V

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

If he is sincerely interested and wants to see you again, ask him to read this book in the interval. After doing that, he must decide for himself whether he wants to go on. He should not be pushed or prodded by you, his wife, or his friends. If he is to find God, the desire must come from within. - Pg. 95 - Working With Others

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

You have a monumental task ahead to set your world in order at the same moment that it has completely changed. Setting your world in order does not mean to 'fix' everybody around you and take care of their affairs. It means to improve and tend to yourself and your affairs. Do not confuse 'setting things in order' with controlling the world around you.

I do not attempt to control what is clearly beyond my sphere. I let my Higher Power tend to the world around me. I affect change from within.

Gathering Wisdom

I am on a spiritual journey. And on this journey I am my own best pilot and my own best philosopher. No one knows me as I know me and no one can synthesize all of the information that I receive each day into a coherent picture of my life as well as I can. If I don't take charge of my journey, no one else will, no one else can. God has given me to me to take care of. I have been put in charge of my own self. I am the one who steers me through my day, who makes a myriad of tiny decisions that add up to a life. I am the eyes and ears behind each hour. I am the choice maker.

My life is up to me.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Opportunities are often disguised as problems and this is why we miss them. With the next problem you encounter, ask, 'What can I learn from this?'

I watch for big problems; they disguise big opportunities.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

When you see 'CRAZY' coming, hurry up and cross the street!

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I know I have the right be alive and happy and full of joy. Today I trust that I am where I'm supposed to be, and am moving in the right direction.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I know I've been spared from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. I know today that it's a miracle standing up here in front of you. I know it. - JoJo S.
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