Buckley3

Day 18 I think?

It’s been a struggle today. Not really worried i’ll drink. Though I did have that ‘see what you’re missing’ thing hit me hard a couple times in the airport.

Mostly just tired, and for whatever reason my ribs are hurting... thought most of that pain was done but I guess not.

It was cold and snowy. Just one of those days I’d rather be in bed. Hard to not be resentful, crabby, and full of self pity.

But hey. No drink. 4 1/2 hour flight, 45 Uber and I can sleep. Tomorrow night I’ll be able to have considerable more time to recharge. Looking forward to it.

Started contemplating a smoke quit. That’s as far as I got but I think it’s coming soon.

I appreciate being able to vent.

-B

Gilmer

I hope you have a good, sound sleep tomorrow, Buckley, and wake up fully refreshed.

Opivotal

Better to vent then drink.

Great job on 18 days.

Hang in there, get some rest, tomorrow is a new day.

JayTee33

Get a good night's sleep. Hope tomorrow is better. Take care,

JayTee

Komplex

Hey Buckley! Sorry you had a tough day. But yay you didn’t drink. Get some rest, hopefully tomorrow is better

Rar

Good Morning Buckley. Hope today is better.

Dee74

Hope todays looking better Buckley?

D

Buckley3

Hey thanks all. Yes, today was better. Mostly b/c I’ve been immersed in work so no time for my mind to wander.

New client, great peeps. I’m coming back in a few weeks so that’s a good sign.

Work is done. Getting dinner to go then I’m going to get much r&r.

Taking an early afternoon flight out tomorrow so I’ll be home at a decent hour. Then it’s Friday and I’m aiming to have my own wheels again. That’ll b a big one off the list.

Today is a good day to not drink.

I will say that the subject of drinking came up multiple times today. Messed with me a little. I’ll be glad when I’m at a point that it doesn’t even phase me.

lessgravity

Nice work staying sober Buck.

Man nothing much worse than an airpot to get my beast stomping around his cage. More so than parties or dinners or bars - anything really. Think it's the manner of my drinking - the absurd, deceit, cheating, hiding aspect of it. Not that there is anything hidden about pounding cocktails at a crappy airport burger joint. But something about it being separate from life, time spent away from responsibilities, ways to get a heavy buzz without being frowned on at the moment etc.

Who knows.

But I feel you. Nice work. Stay strong.

daredevil

B,

You sound like you've made a lot of progress in the last 18 days. Laudable and commendable man. You sound like you're doing well. Good to hear that.

Buckley3

Yea. Airports are such transient places. They are a sort of no place. No one is home there or has roots there. They offer a freedom you can’t get in places you have roots or attachments.

Very dangerous for the ego of an alcoholic.

Appreciate your thoughts and thanks. Who knew you can read a book in an airport and that it’s more enjoyable and enriching than paying for overpriced drinks and letting my ego run amuck? Who knew??