she is taking me with her.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 1
she is taking me with her.
I am knew to online alanon, been going to alanon for years, just cannot bring myself to go and listen to the crap, I have gotten very cynical, bitter, angry and all of the above, I am going to die with my alcoholic 28 year old daughter, and I know its not fair to the rest of my family and friends that love me but I just don't know how to release myself from the pain and guilt I feel over her disease, I believe in god and he walks with me everyday but I wish he was done with me because the pain of watching your beautiful daughter kill herself from alcohol is just more than I can bare anymore.
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Location: East Coast
Posts: 853
Heartbroken2, I'm so sorry for you. I can't imagine how awful it is to see your daughter lost in this horrible addiction. On some level, I'm sure she knows you love her; it so clear how much you feel for her. I'm around your daughter's age, and believe me, your support matters to her even if she isn't expressing it or showing it in her actions. (((hugs))))
I am sorry for what brings you here. 
I hope your daughter will come to her senses and stop drinking.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
So sorry for what brings you here.
You say you go to AlAnon meetings (in whatever format). Have you ever got a sponsor and worked the 12-step recovery program? If not, I would suggest doing so. I'm not in AlAnon but in AA. I made the mistake of thinking that meetings were the program there and kept myself miserable for a long time. The answer to my pain was so near, but yet so far. I sat in rooms surrounded by people talkibg about how AA helped them to find freedom from their pain and I just couldn't understand how that could be. But meetings are meetings. The recovery program turned out to be a whole different kettle of fish.
Apologies if this is something you have already tried.
BB
You say you go to AlAnon meetings (in whatever format). Have you ever got a sponsor and worked the 12-step recovery program? If not, I would suggest doing so. I'm not in AlAnon but in AA. I made the mistake of thinking that meetings were the program there and kept myself miserable for a long time. The answer to my pain was so near, but yet so far. I sat in rooms surrounded by people talkibg about how AA helped them to find freedom from their pain and I just couldn't understand how that could be. But meetings are meetings. The recovery program turned out to be a whole different kettle of fish.
Apologies if this is something you have already tried.
BB
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: St.Petersburg, FL.
Posts: 1,077
Welcome, Heartbroken. I am ashamed that I put my mother through so much suffering when I drank; she was a non-drinker and my dad was a terrible alcoholic--there is lots of alcoholism in both sides of my family. I quit drink for the first time when I was 30 and didn't drink for 15 years (unfortunately I picked up again but am now sober for over 2 years) and I remember how elated my mom was. She died 8 years later and always told me how happy and grateful she was for my sobriety.
I am praying for you and your daughter, that she may find her way to the blessing and peace of sobriety, and that you may be relieved of your anguish. There is also a 'friends and family' section on SR that I'm sure would be very helpful and supportive for you.
I am praying for you and your daughter, that she may find her way to the blessing and peace of sobriety, and that you may be relieved of your anguish. There is also a 'friends and family' section on SR that I'm sure would be very helpful and supportive for you.
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