30 days sober
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 172
30 days sober
It’s been 30 days, it’s been pretty much what I figured it would be. Cloud nine to a dark hole to cloud nine again. I’ve had cravings on and off. Not really nightly anymore but more intense cravings when I do have them. Like tonight, we are having spaghetti and I haven’t had that for dinner for the last month, and I want a glass of red wine so badly, I can’t express! I’m still trying to explain my mentality toward drinking to my husband who can’t quite grasp yet why controlling or stopping is so stressful to me once I start to drink.
Currently we are talking about how I would have had one glass by now and then another with dinner and then another and then another.... so he knows my pattern but hasn’t seen it as a real issue for whatever reason?
He is becoming more talkative about it though, like saying he thinks I am definelty more genetically susceptible for alcoholism but have just been abusing alochol up to this point. I explained that alcoholism is a progressive disease and I could easily get to that point he’s referring to. He is assured that my mentality will change in a longer amount of days than a month, and I think he is trusting me to make the decision of if I pick it up again or not which makes me realize I am really doing this for me and where my alcohol abuse could lead.
So far my saving graces have been using other things as a means to wind down. I love reading alcoholic memoirs, coloring with music on, and reading about other things I find interesting.
I’m not sure what other hobbies will change or come along, but so far I’d say it’s been good more than it’s been hard or bad.
Currently we are talking about how I would have had one glass by now and then another with dinner and then another and then another.... so he knows my pattern but hasn’t seen it as a real issue for whatever reason?
He is becoming more talkative about it though, like saying he thinks I am definelty more genetically susceptible for alcoholism but have just been abusing alochol up to this point. I explained that alcoholism is a progressive disease and I could easily get to that point he’s referring to. He is assured that my mentality will change in a longer amount of days than a month, and I think he is trusting me to make the decision of if I pick it up again or not which makes me realize I am really doing this for me and where my alcohol abuse could lead.
So far my saving graces have been using other things as a means to wind down. I love reading alcoholic memoirs, coloring with music on, and reading about other things I find interesting.
I’m not sure what other hobbies will change or come along, but so far I’d say it’s been good more than it’s been hard or bad.
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