Sick of this dumb habit and the irrational behavior that comes with it
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 150
Sick of this dumb habit and the irrational behavior that comes with it
Hey guys, I'm new here.
I've been trying to kick this habit for a while, but only ever manage to get a week or two dry before I go straight back into it. And as a lot of of you probably know, when you go back...you don't just dabble, you go straight back to the bottles of liquor a day, the drinking at work, etc. Totally reprehensible behavior.
It is so, so irrational. I always do better in life when I'm sober, always much worse when I'm drinking. I don't understand why it's so difficult to stick to sobriety.
I think a lot of it is just boredom. The days become much slower when I'm sober. I'm so used to hours and days blurring together. In reality that should be a benefit, I can use the time to learn some skill or make some money. It's just easier to drink and fester in the warmth of being drunk.
But I can't do it anymore. I've lost too much money, lost my girlfriend, lost my job.
Yeah. So dumb and incredibly selfish. This needs to be my last attempt.
I've been trying to kick this habit for a while, but only ever manage to get a week or two dry before I go straight back into it. And as a lot of of you probably know, when you go back...you don't just dabble, you go straight back to the bottles of liquor a day, the drinking at work, etc. Totally reprehensible behavior.
It is so, so irrational. I always do better in life when I'm sober, always much worse when I'm drinking. I don't understand why it's so difficult to stick to sobriety.
I think a lot of it is just boredom. The days become much slower when I'm sober. I'm so used to hours and days blurring together. In reality that should be a benefit, I can use the time to learn some skill or make some money. It's just easier to drink and fester in the warmth of being drunk.
But I can't do it anymore. I've lost too much money, lost my girlfriend, lost my job.
Yeah. So dumb and incredibly selfish. This needs to be my last attempt.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,040
Welcome to SR! Most of us have been stuck in the exact cycle you are in right now, and the only way out is to stick with it. I know its easier said than done, but you need to completely remove alcohol from the equation.
When I first joined SR I always read about recovery plans, and their importance, it I was so focused on just not drinking, that I didn't have a solid plan in place. When I finally got sobriety to stick it was because of a recovery plan. This link is a great place to start.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html (What exactly is a recovery plan?)
You should also join the January of 2018 class, you will find the support of others who have committed or recommitted to sobriety this month.
Also, join us on the 24 hour thread. It is a great place to check in each day, and commit to another 24 hours sober.
You can do this, and it sounds cliche, but it really is one day at a time.
When I first joined SR I always read about recovery plans, and their importance, it I was so focused on just not drinking, that I didn't have a solid plan in place. When I finally got sobriety to stick it was because of a recovery plan. This link is a great place to start.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html (What exactly is a recovery plan?)
You should also join the January of 2018 class, you will find the support of others who have committed or recommitted to sobriety this month.
Also, join us on the 24 hour thread. It is a great place to check in each day, and commit to another 24 hours sober.
You can do this, and it sounds cliche, but it really is one day at a time.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 937
Look at that sticky “looking for things to do?” at top - lots of ideas.
Netflix binge - clean out your closets - work out - read - take a fun class - yoga - listen to music - volunteer - go out to a movie - journal - read here on SR - run - hike - work in your yard - build something -
The trick is to get through each day sober. “Today - no matter what happens - I will not drink.” Take that option off the table, no matter how much you want it - no matter what.
It sucks really bad for the first few months but IT GETS BETTER. There is no other way then to just plow through it.
Boredom won’t kill you but drinking can.
Netflix binge - clean out your closets - work out - read - take a fun class - yoga - listen to music - volunteer - go out to a movie - journal - read here on SR - run - hike - work in your yard - build something -
The trick is to get through each day sober. “Today - no matter what happens - I will not drink.” Take that option off the table, no matter how much you want it - no matter what.
It sucks really bad for the first few months but IT GETS BETTER. There is no other way then to just plow through it.
Boredom won’t kill you but drinking can.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
I agree that if you want sobriety to stick, it's probably time to start working on your recovery as well as not drinking. It's that recovery work that makes sobriety bearable, sustainable, and one day preferable to drinking. Have you considered checking out the AA meetings in your area?
BB
BB
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,554
Welcome to an encouraging place, wayforward! You sound fed up and disgusted. That's how I felt at the end of my drinking career. There was nothing fun or enjoyable about it anymore - & it had become dangerous. You can have a whole new life - I hope you'll stay with us.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
Hi and welcome wayforward 
posting here regularly really helped me break that cycle of drinking then stopping then drinking again.
There was something about seeing my story in so many other peoples story that made me accept that going back to drinking was a big thing and it would be a retrograde step.
There's a ton of support here
Look forward to seeing you around.
D
posting here regularly really helped me break that cycle of drinking then stopping then drinking again.
There was something about seeing my story in so many other peoples story that made me accept that going back to drinking was a big thing and it would be a retrograde step.
There's a ton of support here
Look forward to seeing you around.
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: NYC/NJ
Posts: 431
welcome. i can relate to craving that warm relaxed feeling and if i could offer any advice i've found reading this alcoholism forum is the one thing that has gotten me past those cravings. i don't even know why, but it works really well
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 1,222
hi wayforward, I am in the January class, come over and join us. Its a good group. I rally recommend you quit and spend a few days reading through this site. You will learn EXACTLY why you are doing what you are doing. It will a very opening experience for you and it will allow you to begin your journey with a better idea of what you are dealing with.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 611
I thought I drank for boredom, but a lot had to do with trying to get out of my head; basically, I was avoiding myself. When I got sober, I realized I was actually an okay person to be around. Post and read here often — it works.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by wayforward 
Hey guys, I'm new here.
I've been trying to kick this habit for a while, but only ever manage to get a week or two dry before I go straight back into it. And as a lot of of you probably know, when you go back...you don't just dabble, you go straight back to the bottles of liquor a day, the drinking at work, etc. Totally reprehensible behavior.
It is so, so irrational. I always do better in life when I'm sober, always much worse when I'm drinking. I don't understand why it's so difficult to stick to sobriety.
I think a lot of it is just boredom. The days become much slower when I'm sober. I'm so used to hours and days blurring together. In reality that should be a benefit, I can use the time to learn some skill or make some money. It's just easier to drink and fester in the warmth of being drunk.
But I can't do it anymore. I've lost too much money, lost my girlfriend, lost my job.
Yeah. So dumb and incredibly selfish. This needs to be my last attempt.
I've been trying to kick this habit for a while, but only ever manage to get a week or two dry before I go straight back into it. And as a lot of of you probably know, when you go back...you don't just dabble, you go straight back to the bottles of liquor a day, the drinking at work, etc. Totally reprehensible behavior.
It is so, so irrational. I always do better in life when I'm sober, always much worse when I'm drinking. I don't understand why it's so difficult to stick to sobriety.
I think a lot of it is just boredom. The days become much slower when I'm sober. I'm so used to hours and days blurring together. In reality that should be a benefit, I can use the time to learn some skill or make some money. It's just easier to drink and fester in the warmth of being drunk.
But I can't do it anymore. I've lost too much money, lost my girlfriend, lost my job.
Yeah. So dumb and incredibly selfish. This needs to be my last attempt.
I kept on going back to it until I moved from "I HAVE TO STOP" and "I NEED TO QUIT" and from berating myself - to a position of clearly stating what I wanted instead.
When I CHOSE SOBRIETY and followed that choice up with ACTION to support it, then made that choice again every day - it worked.
You can!
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 150
Thank you for the words of encouragement and support, guys. Yesterday was my day 1. I quit cold turkey, so the symptoms were pretty bad. I planned on doing this yesterday, so I kept my activities light because I knew I would be shaky and that my body's equilibrium would be off. Just went for a light walk and stayed in, slept for a very long time. Still a little shaky this morning, but feel much better already. I'll likely be able to go to the gym today without a problem.
Thank you very much for the info about a recovery plan. I've definitely got a few different goals to keep myself busy with, but I've had some of these goals since I've been drinking (which is part of why they were never met). I feel like what I've lacked every time I've tried to stop is some kind of support. That's what I will be looking into today, whether it's AA or one of the secular recovery groups in my area.
Thanks for the suggestions! There is definitely plenty to do. I just need to actually...do it. I also feel like there are some subconscious associations I need to work on changing.
Originally Posted by Delilah1
Welcome to SR! Most of us have been stuck in the exact cycle you are in right now, and the only way out is to stick with it. I know its easier said than done, but you need to completely remove alcohol from the equation.
When I first joined SR I always read about recovery plans, and their importance, it I was so focused on just not drinking, that I didn't have a solid plan in place. When I finally got sobriety to stick it was because of a recovery plan. This link is a great place to start.
You should also join the January of 2018 class, you will find the support of others who have committed or recommitted to sobriety this month.
Also, join us on the 24 hour thread. It is a great place to check in each day, and commit to another 24 hours sober.
You can do this, and it sounds cliche, but it really is one day at a time.
When I first joined SR I always read about recovery plans, and their importance, it I was so focused on just not drinking, that I didn't have a solid plan in place. When I finally got sobriety to stick it was because of a recovery plan. This link is a great place to start.
You should also join the January of 2018 class, you will find the support of others who have committed or recommitted to sobriety this month.
Also, join us on the 24 hour thread. It is a great place to check in each day, and commit to another 24 hours sober.
You can do this, and it sounds cliche, but it really is one day at a time.
Originally Posted by madgirl
Look at that sticky “looking for things to do?” at top - lots of ideas.
Netflix binge - clean out your closets - work out - read - take a fun class - yoga - listen to music - volunteer - go out to a movie - journal - read here on SR - run - hike - work in your yard - build something -
The trick is to get through each day sober. “Today - no matter what happens - I will not drink.” Take that option off the table, no matter how much you want it - no matter what.
It sucks really bad for the first few months but IT GETS BETTER. There is no other way then to just plow through it.
Boredom won’t kill you but drinking can.
Netflix binge - clean out your closets - work out - read - take a fun class - yoga - listen to music - volunteer - go out to a movie - journal - read here on SR - run - hike - work in your yard - build something -
The trick is to get through each day sober. “Today - no matter what happens - I will not drink.” Take that option off the table, no matter how much you want it - no matter what.
It sucks really bad for the first few months but IT GETS BETTER. There is no other way then to just plow through it.
Boredom won’t kill you but drinking can.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
Something I've heard numerous times, "I got sick and tired of being sick and tired..."
I spent many years feeling that I needed to quit, that I needed to do something. But I kept waiting. Then one day it all caught up to me.
Know that after you get past the beginning feeling - the uncomfortable existence of being newly sober - you will feel better and start to appreciate it more every day. And somewhere down the road you are going to thank yourself for making this decision. Don't change your mind. It is well worth it.
Congratulations.
I spent many years feeling that I needed to quit, that I needed to do something. But I kept waiting. Then one day it all caught up to me.
Know that after you get past the beginning feeling - the uncomfortable existence of being newly sober - you will feel better and start to appreciate it more every day. And somewhere down the road you are going to thank yourself for making this decision. Don't change your mind. It is well worth it.
Congratulations.
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