Advise
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Join Date: Jan 2018
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Advise
Married to husband 22 years now. He worked OOT until 10 years ago. when he came home full time found out , too late, about his drinking. High functioning alcoholic. He left me last year for 4 months (drank then too) I let him come back and he drinks 5-7 days and act like infant. He is not physical but emotionally abusive. tells me it's my fault he drinks, calls me names. Told me last night that he will not stop drinking until he draws his last breath. Then said he was going to cap is ass so I would finally be happy and rid of him. I love him when is NOT drinking but hate him when he is. Having hard time asking him to leave and not come back this time.
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Join Date: Nov 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 634
I'm sorry you find yourself in this situation. You really do need to look after you. It is a good idea to check out the friends & family section of the forum for advice from people in a similar situation.
Take care.
Take care.
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Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,869
Originally Posted by nequa 
Married to husband 22 years now. He worked OOT until 10 years ago. when he came home full time found out , too late, about his drinking. High functioning alcoholic. He left me last year for 4 months (drank then too) I let him come back and he drinks 5-7 days and act like infant. He is not physical but emotionally abusive. tells me it's my fault he drinks, calls me names. Told me last night that he will not stop drinking until he draws his last breath. Then said he was going to cap is ass so I would finally be happy and rid of him. I love him when is NOT drinking but hate him when he is. Having hard time asking him to leave and not come back this time.
Sorry for what brings you here...
He is telling you he will drink until his last breath and you have no Control over him. Nobody quits drinking for others, it must be for yourself for it to click. Believe him when he says he will drink until the end.
Now it’s up to you to decide if you want to live like this. This is your decision. One thing I will say is that alcoholism isn’t an excuse for abuse and nobody “causes us to drink”!
This is your life! How do you wat it to be???
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Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 131
“Told me last night that he will not stop drinking until he draws his last breath”
This is quite a big red flag IMO. Reminds me if my grandfather who said that he would never stop smoking even if they raised the price of cigs to platinum. He had massive stroke at 55; my grandmother and hospitalhad to teach him to talk, eat, walk etc again. As soon as he got a little better he started smoking again, 2 packs a day. I knew him as a kid sitting in his chair chain smoking whilst watching snooker or cricket. He smoked until his late 70s and died of a cold, well the complications from it anyway. 20 years later my grandmother was in a care home towards her last days, laying down she turns to me weak and frail and asks me if she has wasted her life looking after my grandfather; she wanted to travel etc and he just loved smoking and sitting at home.
Sure there is a moral to that story?!
This is quite a big red flag IMO. Reminds me if my grandfather who said that he would never stop smoking even if they raised the price of cigs to platinum. He had massive stroke at 55; my grandmother and hospitalhad to teach him to talk, eat, walk etc again. As soon as he got a little better he started smoking again, 2 packs a day. I knew him as a kid sitting in his chair chain smoking whilst watching snooker or cricket. He smoked until his late 70s and died of a cold, well the complications from it anyway. 20 years later my grandmother was in a care home towards her last days, laying down she turns to me weak and frail and asks me if she has wasted her life looking after my grandfather; she wanted to travel etc and he just loved smoking and sitting at home.
Sure there is a moral to that story?!
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