I made it one day...drinking now...so bummed!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,355
What made you pick up the drink? Don't say you're sorry to us, say it to yourself as that is the one you are hurting. But more importantly figure out what made you drink again and work out that issue. It works if you work it but it won't if you don't.
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
That's addiction for ya - it tells you that you can't feel good unless you drink. Then you drink and you feel terrible.
How long did you walk around with a silent battle in your head before you picked up? One voice saying, "you need a drink to feel better, just one more day and then we'll get clean tomorrow!" and the other saying, "No, we promised! I HAVE to STOP doing this!" I used to go a day or two before I couldn't take it anymore.
There's a better way.
Come back when you're sober and we'll help you find it.
The lights are always on here at SR.
How long did you walk around with a silent battle in your head before you picked up? One voice saying, "you need a drink to feel better, just one more day and then we'll get clean tomorrow!" and the other saying, "No, we promised! I HAVE to STOP doing this!" I used to go a day or two before I couldn't take it anymore.
There's a better way.
Come back when you're sober and we'll help you find it.
The lights are always on here at SR.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,355
I had that battle in my head of drinking versus not drinking and it was hard to win the battle each time. But I took it one battle at a time and eventually I will win the war. I wanted to drink so bad those first few days to a week to make me feel better but once I got over that hump it became much easier.
But there is usually a root problem or issue that makes you drink. Figuring that out will go a long way in your recovery.
But there is usually a root problem or issue that makes you drink. Figuring that out will go a long way in your recovery.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 90
Originally Posted by OldCoach 
I am so sorry!
You can do this.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2017
Location: Florida
Posts: 9
Yeah, it was crazy. I went to the hospital and got medicine to help with this. I made it one day and it was like I was afraid not to drink. It has been what I do from 5pm on during the week and most all day on weekends forever. Weird to think of myself without alcohol.
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 90
Originally Posted by OldCoach
Yeah, it was crazy. I went to the hospital and got medicine to help with this. I made it one day and it was like I was afraid not to drink. It has been what I do from 5pm on during the week and most all day on weekends forever. Weird to think of myself without alcohol.
As for thinking of yourself without alcohol, that is where I have fallen down. The voice manipulates me into thinking I am only fun and can only be social etc. when drinking, and that to give it up and commit to sobriety would mean that life becomes vanilla and I become boring with no outlet. In reality, not drinking opens up a whole world of opportunity to recreate the person you want to be. It’s a second chance at an authentically good life, and in time I hope that NOT reaching for a drink will become automatic. Best of luck.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,369
Hi OldCoach 
you wouldn't be the first person who got terrifed of not drinking.
Read around tho - there;s hundreds of happy souls here living lives without alcohol in them...we're no different to you.
Have faith that you're doing the right thing...Dump the booze, use the support here (and elsewhere) and stay sober
Change your life
D
you wouldn't be the first person who got terrifed of not drinking.
Read around tho - there;s hundreds of happy souls here living lives without alcohol in them...we're no different to you.
Have faith that you're doing the right thing...Dump the booze, use the support here (and elsewhere) and stay sober
Change your life
D
O-n K-a-r A-r-r-e-s-t
Join Date: May 2016
Location: US
Posts: 600
I agree with silver - tomorrow is another day and another opportunity for you. Use the support here and wherever else you can get it. I had a standard ritual of getting home from work, making up a plate of snacks and drinking until I either forced myself to go to bed or passed out. That was for days/weeks on end when I was on binges and almost every weekend for years and years. And I woke up every morning the last few years praying to God to help me. I surely couldn't help myself. I was trapped in that for too long.
I could do the first thing - don't drink no matter what - don't have it in my house - don't stop anywhere to get it or go anywhere near it. I now avoid those aisles at the store like the plague. I wouldn't be doing this without SR though. The support here is something I need and I am among my people I believe. They understand - they been there, done that. Please keep trying and when you fall down the rabbit hole, keep coming back in, keep trying - you can do this.
I could do the first thing - don't drink no matter what - don't have it in my house - don't stop anywhere to get it or go anywhere near it. I now avoid those aisles at the store like the plague. I wouldn't be doing this without SR though. The support here is something I need and I am among my people I believe. They understand - they been there, done that. Please keep trying and when you fall down the rabbit hole, keep coming back in, keep trying - you can do this.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 611
Hi Coach.
It doesn't take long before evenings and weekends feel full again, but in the early days boredom should definitely be a consideration. Maybe revisit some old hobbies? If nothing else, come here to read and post until the urges pass.
It doesn't take long before evenings and weekends feel full again, but in the early days boredom should definitely be a consideration. Maybe revisit some old hobbies? If nothing else, come here to read and post until the urges pass.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Derbyshire Dales, UK.
Posts: 2,618
Nothing really to add, except that if how we feel/felt in the early days, was as good as it gets then we'd all be back drinking. It gets SO much better and easier.
Be kind to yourself x
Be kind to yourself x
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Originally Posted by OldCoach
it was like I was afraid not to drink.
Not drinking made you feel afraid.
There is a biological reason for that. The short version is that your brain now unconsciously believes you need alcohol to survive, so when you aren't having any it releases the panic chemicals. It's the same response you'd get if someone was holding your head under water. Your brain sends a chemical out that would make you panic to alert you that you need to do something about this lack of air situation.
You don't actually need alcohol to survive, so you're going to need to retrain your brain.
Step 1. Starve it of alcohol no matter what. It's the only way to teach it to stop sounding the panic alarm. It works - you just have to stay sober!
You can be free.
You hold the key.
You can do this.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 260
Originally Posted by OldCoach
Yeah, it was crazy. I went to the hospital and got medicine to help with this. I made it one day and it was like I was afraid not to drink. It has been what I do from 5pm on during the week and most all day on weekends forever. Weird to think of myself without alcohol.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 4,553
Originally Posted by Nonsensical
It wasn't like you were afraid not to drink.
Not drinking made you feel afraid.
There is a biological reason for that. The short version is that your brain now unconsciously believes you need alcohol to survive, so when you aren't having any it releases the panic chemicals. It's the same response you'd get if someone was holding your head under water. Your brain sends a chemical out that would make you panic to alert you that you need to do something about this lack of air situation.
You don't actually need alcohol to survive, so you're going to need to retrain your brain.
Step 1. Starve it of alcohol no matter what. It's the only way to teach it to stop sounding the panic alarm. It works - you just have to stay sober!
You can be free.
You hold the key.
You can do this.
Not drinking made you feel afraid.
There is a biological reason for that. The short version is that your brain now unconsciously believes you need alcohol to survive, so when you aren't having any it releases the panic chemicals. It's the same response you'd get if someone was holding your head under water. Your brain sends a chemical out that would make you panic to alert you that you need to do something about this lack of air situation.
You don't actually need alcohol to survive, so you're going to need to retrain your brain.
Step 1. Starve it of alcohol no matter what. It's the only way to teach it to stop sounding the panic alarm. It works - you just have to stay sober!
You can be free.
You hold the key.
You can do this.
It seems like you have no belief in yourself.
Your addiction wants you to have no self belief and wants you in it's clutches.
You CAN do this. I suspect nobody here with sober time is in any way stronger than you are as a person. Start again please. Get another precious day 1. Go to bed. Get another day. Go to bed. Get another day and so on.......
I wish you well and please stay close to SR whenever you need to. It really does help xxx
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