dawnrun

Hi all,
Its been awhile since ive posted.i went out last night for a family gathering and just knew rah would be horrible when i got home..hes been really moody of late and picking on my ds (13)because of his preformance in soccer.i thinks hes acting like a dry drunk .
i made the mistake of saying this today and he accused me of wanting him to drink so i could leave him.he followed me around our house last night spoiling for an argument and when i told him how cranky hes acting he trew a tantrum banging doors,when kids were in bed.im full of dread all day because of it.
Thankfully ive alanon tonight.
Thanks for reading x

hopeful4

I am glad you are going to Alanon.

Big hugs.

Challenger2013

Sometimes the cravings seem to get so bad that they are looking for an excuse. You have zero control over his addiction so don’t take that false blame.
Good luck!

Sasha1972

I'm really sorry you have to deal with this behavior. I hope things get better for you today.

dawnrun

Thanks for all the replies.i did go to alanon and subject was forgivness and.boy have i still alot of work in recovery!it really does help posting on this site to see things clearly and know im not responsable for every mood swing rah has.thanks again.

FeelingGreat

dawn, when you say you're scared, I hope it isn't because of physical abuse or intimidation? It's one thing to be annoyed by a tantrum, but actually fearing harm is something else. If you're feeling it, so will the children.

dawnrun

Feeling great
Ok reading back through my post i get what your saying but no i wasnt afraid of phyical voilence.it was just like reliving all those drunken years of the unknown.im acually outside my councellors now to figure out why i couldnt deal with a tantrum..
Sorry about spelling new phone and no predictive txt.

Mango blast

It sounds like emotional abuse, which is every bit as traumatic as physical abuse. (((Hugs)))

dawnrun

Ktf
I just read the emotional abuse article you shared and yes i could tick of most things.i just thought when alcohol leaves the home so would the nastyness.ive alanon a concellor and family therapy every week so hoping the stronger i get the less rah will affect me and in doing so be able to see how to change the situation for kids and myself.

Ive never giving "me" time to look at myself and i know im not as weak as i thought alot of work on me and i really believe change will follow.thanks ktf

Mango blast

A huge thing that helped me once I saw there was emotional abuse involved was calling a domestic violence shelter help center. It provided a different kind of support I hadn't had before. A growing support network is a beautiful thing for healing and recovery.