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MH and alcohol - The dilemma

Old 12-07-2017, 02:52 PM
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MH and alcohol - The dilemma

This is quite a tough 1 to talk about really.

I feel really trapped with stuff. My life has really gone down the pan. There's been family deaths (i'm now isolated and have no friends) and the bane of my life is.... Mental health problems.

I'm not addicted to drinking, but I do have a drinking problem (more on that further on), just like I don't have a gambling addiction, but have a gambling problem.

Life has really had it's lows for me. Really crazy things have happened over the years and I have never landed on my feet after, thanks to MH problems.

It's like there's this cycle. On the face of it I have PTSD, depression, anxiety and bereavement issues as well as being completely isolated. Daily I battle with struggling to find any reason for living and I realise there is little I can do.

Let's say, combating the isolation. Well the anxiety and depression prevents that. However, on a day where I do go out, it's horrible for me. The symptoms make it very uncomfortable and some people misunderstand my symptoms for being on drugs. That never goes to plan.

What about the bereavement? Nothing brings back my family. What would I be moving on for? To be happy about being in my early 30's and completely alone with nobody?

You get the gist really, i'm completely stuck and can't do it on my own.


MH services in the UK are known to be dire. As an example, I have clearly needed an occupational therapist for quite a few years now. I had no idea until recently when I encountered the right MH team member who suggested this. It then all made sense to me and after being referred by them, an OT contacted me for an appointment in a few weeks. So that's good, albeit annoying that other MH teams were fobbing me off for ages.

Thats enough of that anyway..... Onto alcohol and gambling and the "problem" not "addiction".

So both are bad, horrible things that cause more harm than good unless used in complete moderation. I get that.

I don't crave gambling or alcohol day to day.

Yet it's because of my own circumstances I turn to either at all.

Let's say about alcohol.....


Day to day, my life is filled with lows. The depression is pretty severe due the the problems I mentioned at the start. Over a prolonged period of time, this get's too much for me. I need a way to have some happiness, a buzz of any kind.

Then, in comes alcohol. Instant buzz and some happiness at last. Yes, the next day I feel rough and awful but to me it's a small price to pay for even just 4 hours of temporary depression and anxiety removal.

Alcohol also ties in with mental health problems....

In order to delay the point where I'm that low and can't take it anymore, I heavily rely on the past for "comfort". I look through my late mothers belongings, read letters and books from school, even draw out maps of primary school from my memory and all the classrooms I was in.

When things do get that low I feel as though I need that instant "buzz" or "happiness", drinking does that but it also helps me be closer to the happy past.

Back then as a kid I wasn't low, I was a happy child and so with the alcohol to remove the lowness, i'm happy again somewhat. I then play old adverts and songs from that time to have a more authentic feeling to it, as if I was back in that past now.

Not good, I know....

But I do have all sorts of things I would love to do to keep that lowness at bay, but I just can't do them on my own. So then it just builds to that point where I can't cope with the lowness and i'm back on the drink.


So I guess that explains it.... It's not an addiction, but a problem but to put it simply, I have no way out.
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Old 12-08-2017, 04:16 AM
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Welcome to SR, Tomshire. I believe there's a "way out" for most of us. My experience over the last 12 years is that it takes commitment and determination to remain clean and sober and to address my mental and emotional issues. I am not fully cured, nor do I believe I ever will be. This is a journey that I'm committed to for life, and to be honest I wouldn't want it any other way. My life is just way too good now to return to my former way of living.
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Old 12-12-2017, 11:03 AM
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It's called dual diagnosis. Substance abuse with a psychiatric diagnosis.

I have it, my other diagnosis is bipolar disorder and possibly ADD.

Both have to be dealt with.
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