Reaching out
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 51
Reaching out
Hi guys so I just dropped my husband off at the airport n while things r going great I’m staying positive n working the program on which I know is my saving grace a part of me is anxious that I had s thought “ oh he isn’t here I’m home alone no one will know if I drink” it past cause I played the tape through n know that’s s terrible idea but it scared me thst it just popped into my mind. I was wondering if snyone else can relate n what they do? I’ve filled my week with plans to meet for coffee with friends go to meetings n also see my therapist it’s in the moments I’m slone I’m abit anxious
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
I was pretty early in recovery, less than a year, and was driving somewhere with the mrs. when she said she was thinking about going to Phily for a weekend to see her oldest son. Almost instantaneously I thought, "I can drink."
I didn't. It was just a thought, a reaction that I didn't act on. That's what alcohol has done to our neural pathways. We are going to have addictive thoughts. Recovery is not acting on them.
Stay strong.
I didn't. It was just a thought, a reaction that I didn't act on. That's what alcohol has done to our neural pathways. We are going to have addictive thoughts. Recovery is not acting on them.
Stay strong.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
I understand completely. I drank alone, hiding it as much as possible, and my husband travelled quite a bit, so it was a huge trigger when he went away. I pampered myself a bit and rented movies I wanted to watch and bought some lovely bath products. You can do this, and you will be able to break that connection. 
The opposite of addiction is connection.
Join Date: Nov 2017
Location: Oregon, USA
Posts: 373
I can relate. After being with my family for three weeks I’m heading home to my apartment on the other side of the country where I live alone. On the plane ride I had a thought about drinking - sort of an excitement rush mixed with raw fear, very emotional. But it passed in about 5 seconds....Day 28 today.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: California
Posts: 142
I'm guessing its normal... Anytime I know I'll be alone (right now is one of those times) the thought crosses my mind (It crossed mine about an hour ago)... "I'll be able to go get vodka and no one can stop me." And then I play the tape forward... which, for me, ends with me in the hospital. I just try to distract myself... SR is my number one go-to these days😁
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Oakland
Posts: 561
That tape played thru my head today. I missed my Antabuse dose and knew I wouldn’t die if I drank. I start looking around at where I can duck into. I think about who I’ll lie to. Then I think about telling everyone here the truth. Ugh. I don’t wanna start over. It’s so hard.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,368
Originally Posted by Pressmetilihurt 
That tape played thru my head today. I missed my Antabuse dose and knew I wouldn’t die if I drank. .
You might want to use that to shut the AV up
D
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