New here...day 13
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2015
Posts: 1
New here...day 13
I registered here a couple years ago, but quickly forgot about it. I am 30 years old, and have been struggling with alcohol for about a decade now. I have always been the type to need to drink every single night to the point of passing out, for years at a time. I couldn't go a single day without it.
A couple months ago, I decided I needed to quit, and stopped drinking. On my 30th day, I decided to drink (but not even completely *wanting* to), and since then, it has progressively gotten even worse then before. It was to the point where I was drinking all night every night, more drinking when I woke up just to make myself pass back out, and sleeping a lot of the day. Sad and scary to see what I was doing to myself. I could hardly eat anything out of pure nausea, my skin on my face had turned red and extremely dry. I was an anxious, depressed mess, and the guilt was eating me alive. I was slowly killing myself. I have 3 kids that I *need* to be there for. I cannot go back to that life again...I can't.
I am on day 13 today, and feeling good. It's so hard to grasp how energetic, guilt-free, and truly *good* I feel when not drinking...and why I would ever give up a life free from that poison, just to go back to that vicious cycle. I am hoping and working toward never touching it again...starting with a day at a time.
A couple months ago, I decided I needed to quit, and stopped drinking. On my 30th day, I decided to drink (but not even completely *wanting* to), and since then, it has progressively gotten even worse then before. It was to the point where I was drinking all night every night, more drinking when I woke up just to make myself pass back out, and sleeping a lot of the day. Sad and scary to see what I was doing to myself. I could hardly eat anything out of pure nausea, my skin on my face had turned red and extremely dry. I was an anxious, depressed mess, and the guilt was eating me alive. I was slowly killing myself. I have 3 kids that I *need* to be there for. I cannot go back to that life again...I can't.
I am on day 13 today, and feeling good. It's so hard to grasp how energetic, guilt-free, and truly *good* I feel when not drinking...and why I would ever give up a life free from that poison, just to go back to that vicious cycle. I am hoping and working toward never touching it again...starting with a day at a time.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,519
Welcome supernova! This is just the place for you - the encouragement is wonderful. We all understand, like no one else can.
I was the same type of drinker - but I let it go on for much longer. The result was devastating. I put myself in deep trouble with my reckless behavior. I'm so glad you're putting a stop to the destruction now. You can definitely do this and have a great life, free of your addiction. Congrats on your 13 days!
I was the same type of drinker - but I let it go on for much longer. The result was devastating. I put myself in deep trouble with my reckless behavior. I'm so glad you're putting a stop to the destruction now. You can definitely do this and have a great life, free of your addiction. Congrats on your 13 days!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 2,872
Welcome glad you posted.
I drank like that, too. For ten years. I don't have a family and worked when I was able to so I could get away with it. Until it got bad, anyway. Real bad.
I hope you never get as low as I did and congratulations on your sober time.
Keep coming back, you'll find a lot of support here. And remember, you never have to drink again.
I drank like that, too. For ten years. I don't have a family and worked when I was able to so I could get away with it. Until it got bad, anyway. Real bad.
I hope you never get as low as I did and congratulations on your sober time.
Keep coming back, you'll find a lot of support here. And remember, you never have to drink again.
Keep going on the sober path, it gets better. 
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 1,355
The old saying "You can't see the forest through the trees" kind of plays here. You can't envision feeling better when you are in such a mess. I figured the way I felt was my new normal. Forget that!!! It's amazing how good I feel that I am not drinking.
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