Crunch time

Old 10-24-2017, 11:01 PM
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Crunch time

packing up the house. new house closes tomorrow. the past 2 weeks he has told me he has intake appointments with a couple of rehabs, but always an excuse why he cant go. insurance. money. time. i know its manipulation. it didnt work this time. tonight i told him house closes tomorrow. he said hes proud of me. i asked if i could leave one of my dogs here with his for a bit to help his adjust. he said huh? i knew he hasnt been listening. i knew he didnt want to hear it. so i reiterated i was moving this week. without him. no rehab no move. that wed talked about it a zillion times the past year. the pain in his eyes nearly broke me. im a strong woman but my heart aches. i love this man. the consequences of his addiction hurt me as much as they do him. i dont wish him ill. i have dont get me wrong. ive been angry and hateful. now im just sad. i hope he finds his way before its too late for him. i pray for me i can do this with grace and dignity. im not just leaving him. im leaving the state i grew up in and have lived most of my life here. theres a lot that goes with it and a lot of ghosts left behind. guess im feeling nostalgic. wishing for times that were simpler and happy before his demons took over his life, and mine. grief is a strange thing. sneaks up on you and pulls the rug out when you least expect it, when you think you have a decent handle on it. thanks for listening.
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Old 10-25-2017, 03:09 AM
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I know how mentally exhausting this must all be for you right now, kwinner. I hope that the move goes smoothly and that there is no real drama. Hang in there!
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Old 10-25-2017, 09:43 AM
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It hurts so badly to see someone you love make such bad choices. My heart is with you.
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Old 10-26-2017, 03:57 AM
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I hope the closing went well and that you have been able to begin moving some of your things. Congratulations on your new place! I hope it becomes a peaceful and joy-filled home
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