Hi Guys...New Here
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Shildon, Co. Durham
Posts: 5
Hi Guys...New Here
Hey...I am Fozz aka quakerfan and it is my first time here, so hi guys...
I am 35 from N.E England and my addiction is over the counter medication, mostly co-codamol and nytol sleepers and have been since the age of 17.
I dabbled with recreational drugs when I was 17/18, bit never got addicted to illegal drugs.
I was in a car crash when I was 22 and a consequence of that I was prescribed 30/500 strength Co-Codamol and later Tramadol, I was taking off Tramadol in 2006, but stayed addicted to codeine bases pills ever since, to the point I would steal my dads meds for my fix. To make things worse in my mind, I have mental health problems namely Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder.
I have paid dearly over the years, I missed out on having relationships with women as I did not want to lay my baggage on others or be a burden on anybody, although I did end up in a relationship with my now wife through which I was given my step-daughter, a beautiful 6 year old and my addictions has been a strain on my short marriage, but she has promised to do whatever to help me.
I also lost my sister when I was 33, she was only 14 months younger than me and died from multiple organ failure brought on by a rapid bout of pneumonia and she also had cirrohsis brought on by years of hard binge drinking.
I am in a treatment programme, ideally I want to find a rehab centre and get clean as not much has worked up to now.
I have been admitted to hospital 3 times in the last 7 years because of an accidental overdose and on many other occasions I have downed that many sleepers and painkillers to the point of paralysis where I could not move or call for help if I wanted to.aa
It needs to stop, I am frightened and scared that I will end up going out like my sister, I still have vivid nightmares about the night she died and cant seem to shake them at all.
Anyway thats a brief glimpse into what has made who I am and look forward to reading the boards amd hopefully make new friends
I am 35 from N.E England and my addiction is over the counter medication, mostly co-codamol and nytol sleepers and have been since the age of 17.
I dabbled with recreational drugs when I was 17/18, bit never got addicted to illegal drugs.
I was in a car crash when I was 22 and a consequence of that I was prescribed 30/500 strength Co-Codamol and later Tramadol, I was taking off Tramadol in 2006, but stayed addicted to codeine bases pills ever since, to the point I would steal my dads meds for my fix. To make things worse in my mind, I have mental health problems namely Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder.
I have paid dearly over the years, I missed out on having relationships with women as I did not want to lay my baggage on others or be a burden on anybody, although I did end up in a relationship with my now wife through which I was given my step-daughter, a beautiful 6 year old and my addictions has been a strain on my short marriage, but she has promised to do whatever to help me.
I also lost my sister when I was 33, she was only 14 months younger than me and died from multiple organ failure brought on by a rapid bout of pneumonia and she also had cirrohsis brought on by years of hard binge drinking.
I am in a treatment programme, ideally I want to find a rehab centre and get clean as not much has worked up to now.
I have been admitted to hospital 3 times in the last 7 years because of an accidental overdose and on many other occasions I have downed that many sleepers and painkillers to the point of paralysis where I could not move or call for help if I wanted to.aa
It needs to stop, I am frightened and scared that I will end up going out like my sister, I still have vivid nightmares about the night she died and cant seem to shake them at all.
Anyway thats a brief glimpse into what has made who I am and look forward to reading the boards amd hopefully make new friends
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
Hi Fozz,
You've landed in a good supportive place and it sounds like you are taking the steps you need in order to address your addiction.
It's hard, I know, but you can overcome this if you are willing to do the work.
Welcome!
O
You've landed in a good supportive place and it sounds like you are taking the steps you need in order to address your addiction.
It's hard, I know, but you can overcome this if you are willing to do the work.
Welcome!
O
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,874
Welcome to SR, Fozz.
This is a fantastic place for support, encouragement and understanding.
I am so terribly sorry to hear about your sister.
I am sorry, too, to hear about your car accident and the problems which followed.
Stay close.
We are here for you.
This is a fantastic place for support, encouragement and understanding.
I am so terribly sorry to hear about your sister.
I am sorry, too, to hear about your car accident and the problems which followed.
Stay close.
We are here for you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Shildon, Co. Durham
Posts: 5
Thanks guys.
Means a lot to me that there is somewhere I can come and be amongst people who are/have been in the same boat as me, somewhere I can be as open as I want to be, where I am not afraid to talk about addiction and more importantly somewhere I am not seen as 'just another junkie' and that attitude has hardened me and left me with little trust in society, and people are quick to judge without knowing who I am.
I look forward to reading other peoples stories, and hopefully find my own way on the road to recovery,I have paid a heavy price so far, I wont willingly lie down and let tjis beat me
Means a lot to me that there is somewhere I can come and be amongst people who are/have been in the same boat as me, somewhere I can be as open as I want to be, where I am not afraid to talk about addiction and more importantly somewhere I am not seen as 'just another junkie' and that attitude has hardened me and left me with little trust in society, and people are quick to judge without knowing who I am.
I look forward to reading other peoples stories, and hopefully find my own way on the road to recovery,I have paid a heavy price so far, I wont willingly lie down and let tjis beat me
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 4,553
Hi Fozz it's always great to see someone finding this wonderful place. I'm so very sorry to read of the loss of your sister.
Fear is such a cruel emotion and it can keep us a prisoner in active addiction for far too long.
I'd recommend posting as much as you need to and find threads that feel comfortable. It is a wonderful supportive place and I hope you get a little relief by just being here.
It can be done Fozz, nobody here is special or different to you. Making the commitment and doing whatever it takes to stay clean is a great start. Have you looked in to NA meetings up there? Alcohol is my addiction so I apologise if I don't fully understand what you have to deal with in terms of pain and withdrawal but I do know that you CAN do this.
Take care (from a fellow Geordie btw) xx
Fear is such a cruel emotion and it can keep us a prisoner in active addiction for far too long.
I'd recommend posting as much as you need to and find threads that feel comfortable. It is a wonderful supportive place and I hope you get a little relief by just being here.
It can be done Fozz, nobody here is special or different to you. Making the commitment and doing whatever it takes to stay clean is a great start. Have you looked in to NA meetings up there? Alcohol is my addiction so I apologise if I don't fully understand what you have to deal with in terms of pain and withdrawal but I do know that you CAN do this.
Take care (from a fellow Geordie btw) xx
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Shildon, Co. Durham
Posts: 5
thanks joandmelandhan
One thing, I ain't a geordie
Born a mackem and proud adopted Quaker due to Supporting Darlington (someone has to, may as well be me lol).
It is actually quite a relief to find somewhere non-judgmental, wherw I wont be shot down and also where I can express myself quite freely
One thing, I ain't a geordie
Born a mackem and proud adopted Quaker due to Supporting Darlington (someone has to, may as well be me lol).
It is actually quite a relief to find somewhere non-judgmental, wherw I wont be shot down and also where I can express myself quite freely
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