1st Al-Anon meeting
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Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 15
1st Al-Anon meeting
I went to a meeting tonight. I was skeptical at first, as I watched more mature women walking in. I thought, how are they going to relate to my situation? I decided to give it a chance. I am so very glad I did. I intend to go back and I think I'm going to find a great deal of wisdom in that room.
Glad you went, even though skeptical.
Glad it went well! As BKA said, oftentimes we have to go to several meetings before finding a good fit. As you saw, though, living with an A is pretty much the same for all of us, regardless of age, gender, etc.
One thing that I found particularly helpful in understanding what Alanon is and how it works was to read Alanon literature. A couple books that are good for starters, IMO, are "How Alanon Works for Families and Friends of Alcoholics" and "Paths to Recovery." Amazon generally has tons of used Alanon books available for very reasonable prices.
I hope you keep going, maybe try some other meetings just so you have a backup in case you can't make your usual one.
Alanon may or may not be the whole or only answer for you. It hasn't been for me, but it is definitely an important part, and I don't think I'd be where I am now w/o it.
Glad it went well! As BKA said, oftentimes we have to go to several meetings before finding a good fit. As you saw, though, living with an A is pretty much the same for all of us, regardless of age, gender, etc.
One thing that I found particularly helpful in understanding what Alanon is and how it works was to read Alanon literature. A couple books that are good for starters, IMO, are "How Alanon Works for Families and Friends of Alcoholics" and "Paths to Recovery." Amazon generally has tons of used Alanon books available for very reasonable prices.
I hope you keep going, maybe try some other meetings just so you have a backup in case you can't make your usual one.
Alanon may or may not be the whole or only answer for you. It hasn't been for me, but it is definitely an important part, and I don't think I'd be where I am now w/o it.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 15
Glad you went, even though skeptical.
Glad it went well! As BKA said, oftentimes we have to go to several meetings before finding a good fit. As you saw, though, living with an A is pretty much the same for all of us, regardless of age, gender, etc.
One thing that I found particularly helpful in understanding what Alanon is and how it works was to read Alanon literature. A couple books that are good for starters, IMO, are "How Alanon Works for Families and Friends of Alcoholics" and "Paths to Recovery." Amazon generally has tons of used Alanon books available for very reasonable prices.
I hope you keep going, maybe try some other meetings just so you have a backup in case you can't make your usual one.
Alanon may or may not be the whole or only answer for you. It hasn't been for me, but it is definitely an important part, and I don't think I'd be where I am now w/o it.
Glad it went well! As BKA said, oftentimes we have to go to several meetings before finding a good fit. As you saw, though, living with an A is pretty much the same for all of us, regardless of age, gender, etc.
One thing that I found particularly helpful in understanding what Alanon is and how it works was to read Alanon literature. A couple books that are good for starters, IMO, are "How Alanon Works for Families and Friends of Alcoholics" and "Paths to Recovery." Amazon generally has tons of used Alanon books available for very reasonable prices.
I hope you keep going, maybe try some other meetings just so you have a backup in case you can't make your usual one.
Alanon may or may not be the whole or only answer for you. It hasn't been for me, but it is definitely an important part, and I don't think I'd be where I am now w/o it.
fbb, I totally get it about how it's nice simply to get out and see people! Like you, I'd gotten really isolated, and it was just nice to be among other folks, hear them talk, watch their faces...
It was also a great reminder of just how abnormal my "normal" life had gotten w/my A. If I spoke to these folks, they heard me the first time, didn't automatically go "What?" to everything I said. If I talked w/someone and then saw him/her a week later, he/she remembered what we'd talked about, instead of going "well, I guess it wasn't important enough for me to memorize it" in a snide way like XAH so often did. It was really helpful in keeping myself from minimizing just how bad the marriage had gotten, to see what interactions were like among people who actually liked and respected each other.
And that makes me realize just how often, when I went seeking a specific thing, I may or may not have found the thing I was looking for, but almost always found something worthwhile...thanks for making me think about that!
It was also a great reminder of just how abnormal my "normal" life had gotten w/my A. If I spoke to these folks, they heard me the first time, didn't automatically go "What?" to everything I said. If I talked w/someone and then saw him/her a week later, he/she remembered what we'd talked about, instead of going "well, I guess it wasn't important enough for me to memorize it" in a snide way like XAH so often did. It was really helpful in keeping myself from minimizing just how bad the marriage had gotten, to see what interactions were like among people who actually liked and respected each other.
And that makes me realize just how often, when I went seeking a specific thing, I may or may not have found the thing I was looking for, but almost always found something worthwhile...thanks for making me think about that!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 141
I went to a meeting tonight. I was skeptical at first, as I watched more mature women walking in. I thought, how are they going to relate to my situation? I decided to give it a chance. I am so very glad I did. I intend to go back and I think I'm going to find a great deal of wisdom in that room.
Glad you went to the Alanon Meeting!!!!
Who knows? You might end up asking one of the "mature" women to be your Sponsor. (That's what I did, and it turned out to be one of the best decisions I've ever made.)
Hugs to ya'
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