Ohme

I've been here before, given up alcohol for 7 days, 30 days and lots of small tries in between. When I'm off it I honestly feel so good. So healthy and happy and clear. But then I just go back to it, just to feel like crap again. Today is day 3 and I've already considered giving up about 100 times. Why is my brain like this?

ChloeRose63

You are not alone. I am at Day 3, too. I do the same thing you do. We both have to get it into our thick skulls that we can never drink normally. It is useless to even expect that we can.

JoeCree

You must rewire your brain. Simple yet daunting as a whole. If you dont enact change to your lifestyle and thinking, then you trap yourself on the never ending carousel. Time to step off..

PerplexednLost

I do the same thing over and over...haven't spent more than 60 days sober in more than 20 years...I know I have no power over alcohol after the first taste, and then I have no power over anything once I turn it over to alcohol and yet I do it again and again. I have said I'm never drinking again only to be intoxicated again in less than 12 hours. I haven't drank anything in 3 days either, but I'm not sure I should count day one as I was surely still drunk for half of it. Man last Friday was bad...

Jojay

Ohme,you can do this.Keep reminding yourself of the health benefits of giving up.Keep posting,there is a wealth of support here

ChloeRose63

Perplexed,
I count the hours since my last drink. Right now I am at close to 80 hours. That way I know how long my body has been detoxing the alcohol and can monitor my withdrawl symptoms. It helps me anticipate feeling better.

Frank14

You can't simply "stop drinking." You need to have a solid plan and follow it daily (hourly sometimes). It takes a lot of work and a whole lifestyle and mindset change. Do you have a plan?

doggonecarl

Why do I quit quitting?

There is a sign in the gym I go to. Taped to the wall, right in front of the rowing machine I use. It reads,

When you think of quitting, remember why you started in the first place.

It has nothing to do with recovery...

...and yet?

Silverback4

You can get there and it Will get better if you firstly commit to never drinking again. Let that sink right into your bones and deep into your brain.
There is no other solution to our issue.

Your brain and the little alcohol devil inside it will play tricks on you, tell you it’s ok to drink, and try and get you to pick up.
Sounds like you are going through lots of this st the moment but it does, get better a long as you do not give into it.

A plan for recovery suited to you will improve your ability to fight this little devil.
You need to accept first off all that no matter what, no matter where and no matter when you will never be able to have a drink again.

tomls

I had to convince myself that my sobriety was the most important thing in my life cause if I couldn't get this thing right I was not going to live much longer. It has to be the most important thing in your life. Without it do you even have a life? Best wishes for you on your journey!

Ohme

A little bit. I plan on taking up guitar when I'm ambitious and video games when I'm not on the weekday evenings when I'm bored and anxious and usually drink. Driving straight home and avoiding the stores that sell alcohol. I am going to be avoiding my friends who are triggers for now. When I'm ready to I'll invite them on sober activities like hiking. On weekends, when I usually let it all hang out, I plan on making a plan beforehand for the whole 3 days. ie., Friday Night, movies then hamburgers, Saturday Morning market and dog park, Saturday afternoon yoga and cleaning home etc.
On Sunday I'm going to a restaurant so I'm planning on ordering a big ridiculous milkshake instead of beer like I did when I was a kid.
That's all I have for now.

to all of you for your kind support!

Misc72

Love the milkshake idea! Excellent!

Dee74

Posting here regularly really helped me get out of that 2 day cycle where I'd go from never drinking again to being the first customer at the liquor store.

What are you doing to stay sober ohme?
D

DangerZone

Keep trying and learn from your relapses. Why did it happen? What triggered it? How can you avoid it next time?

Do not ever give up trying to quit is the best advice I can give you. If you gave it up for 30-days you obviously have the ability to live sober you just need to sustain it.

Keep coming to this site. Everyday. We are here to help you.

D122y

oh,

imo...it is all about dopamine.

Booze alters our brain's ability to produce dopamine. We crave the booze to feel happy.

To get through this time we have to produce endorphins and adrenaline to supplement the dopamine...or just wait it out.

Doing nice things for people produces dopamine. E.g. helping on SR, volunteer work, helping an old lady cross the street, donating time and money etc etc.

I did a ton of working out and it worked for me.

That is my advice.

Eventually, we get used to our level of dopamine and/or start to produce enough to make us happy. This takes months and years.

When I do cardio, I get a hit of endorphins/adrenaline at around 17 minutes in...that is including a 5 minute warm up. The cool thing is...my happiness lasts for hours afterwards. Hours.

Obviously, because we like the "high" we crave the workout. It is a win win situation.

Lifting weights gets me there a bit quicker. Lifting heavy weight gets me there faster.

That is my advice.

Thanks.

Berrybean

Perhaps reading through the links on Dee's thread will help think of some more little things you could add in.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...y-plans-1.html (Psst...wanna know why I'm always recommending recovery plans?)


Had to LOL at the milkshake - me and my pal from AA went for a meal with our partners last Saturday. The meal was pretty healthy and the desserts at that place aren't much to write home about, so we left them to get on with their bar-hopping while we took a stroll to a diner that does the most amazing 'Freak shakes'. Mine had cookie-dough cheese-cake (a whole slice) in it, with meringue on top, whipped cream and chocolate sauce. Her's was more brownie based. Lol. TOOOOOOOO good. But that isn't part of my recovery plan. It's just a bonus of e working what IS my plan on a daily basis - that I get to enjoy those things now.

A big bonus ofmy recovery has been finally being brave enough to reconnect with my childhood self. It's a sad fact that I started drinking and sex far too young at 13 / 14 years old. There was no gradual transition from being a child for me. No healthy 'growing up'. I went from bewildered child to bewildered child doing adult stuff to bewildered adult doing adult stuff. I think I just got hurt and scared, and my childish and fearful reaction was to try and bury the part of myself that hurt. Like that was gonna work!! The little girl inside wasn't quite dead though thankfully.
I suppose my healing needed to start where my self-harm / damaging choices took off. Swings anyone??

All the best for your recovery and sobriety.
BB

Gottalife

That was me too. There is one train of thought here that the reason I could not stop was because I never made a one time irrevocable decision to stop drinking for good.

The other train of thought, which was my experience, was that I made those decision many times, but lacked the power to carry through. It was as if the decision, made with such sincerity and desire just a few hours earlier, just faded away.

I did decide I wanted to stop for good, and I did it by seeking the power to put the decision into effect. When I started sincerely seeking the power, the drink problem was removed. I never had a serious urge to drink from that point on. I didn't even notice. It may have been to do with the fact that my mind, such as it was, was focussed in an entirely different direction.

hpdw

I read on here someones sponsor in AA told him if you want to stop drinking you need to stop drinking !!! think about it .