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Tell me your reasons

Old 09-12-2017, 04:34 PM
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Tell me your reasons

This might be the wrong forum for this post but I joined yesterday so I still feel like a newcomer

I want to drink. This is Day 3. I wish I could bottle the feelings I have when I am hungover/detoxing so I can open it up and know exactly why I am quitting but I can’t so instead, here are the reasons I don’t want to drink:
  • The utter despair and sadness I feel after a binge. Can’t stop crying for days until I drink again, starting the cycle all over again.
  • The restless sleep and nightmares for 3-4 nights after my binge.
  • Having to check all my methods of messaging to see who I talked to the night before and what I said.
  • The calories from the booze and crappy food I eat while drunk and the few days of being hungover. My diet suffers for days.
  • Dehydration. Dry scaly hands.
  • Yet my skin is still breaking out.
  • Laziness.
  • Shame.

What are your reasons for not drinking?

At some point when I am feeling positive I will list out the pros of not drinking but I’m not feeling positive right now. Feel free to add those too though!
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Old 09-12-2017, 04:45 PM
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A miserable death is a big one for me.
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Old 09-12-2017, 04:52 PM
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Originally Posted by tomls View Post
A miserable death is a big one for me.
Curiously, that didn't make the list but should most definitely be on there.
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Old 09-12-2017, 05:15 PM
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I love waking up feeling good. When I was drinking, I'd wake up feeling horrible and hating myself. I don't miss those days...
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Old 09-12-2017, 05:30 PM
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Being present, confident, active and happy are only a few of my reasons.

Congrats on day 3 Berryblue. We all know how difficult the first few days can be. Just know that you WILL start to feel better...and eventually, the obsession to drink will lesson. Hang in there and be strong...you've got this!

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Old 09-12-2017, 05:35 PM
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All the things I use to enjoy are back in my life. Keep up the great work. It just keeps getting better.
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Old 09-12-2017, 08:13 PM
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I get-
Guilt
Regret
Depression
Despair
Isolation
Apathy
Self loathing
Anguish
Shame
Fatigue
Careless
Impulsive
Mindless
Irresponsible
.......
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Old 09-12-2017, 08:15 PM
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The utter regret the next day
Feeling lazy
Not getting things done
Missing out on life
Missing out on the enjoyment of things you can do when feeling well
I can think off 100's of more, and earlier posts have already mentioned many of them.
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Old 09-12-2017, 08:17 PM
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The lost time / time I'm missing out on with my 2 boys cause I'm too hungover to get out of bed on weekends

The embarrassment for the foolish behavior I displayed when drunk

The memory loss after a blackout - waking up wondering who I upset or offended the night before

The anxiety and panic attacks the 3 days following a binge

The depression for 3-5 days following a binge

The need to drink first thing in the morning to level set
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Old 09-12-2017, 09:00 PM
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Originally Posted by berryblue View Post
This might be the wrong forum for this post but I joined yesterday so I still feel like a newcomer

I want to drink. This is Day 3. I wish I could bottle the feelings I have when I am hungover/detoxing so I can open it up and know exactly why I am quitting but I can’t so instead, here are the reasons I don’t want to drink:
  • The utter despair and sadness I feel after a binge. Can’t stop crying for days until I drink again, starting the cycle all over again.
  • The restless sleep and nightmares for 3-4 nights after my binge.
  • Having to check all my methods of messaging to see who I talked to the night before and what I said.
  • The calories from the booze and crappy food I eat while drunk and the few days of being hungover. My diet suffers for days.
  • Dehydration. Dry scaly hands.
  • Yet my skin is still breaking out.
  • Laziness.
  • Shame.

What are your reasons for not drinking?

At some point when I am feeling positive I will list out the pros of not drinking but I’m not feeling positive right now. Feel free to add those too though!
I had all those reasons when I was drinking, except for the junk food thing. Eating interfered with my drinking, so I didn't eat.

The thing is I had all those reasons clearly in mind in the morning as very good reasons why I was not going to drink that day.

But by that afternoon, I had changed my mind. The memory of the misery was all but gone, and the previous dramas did not flood into my mind to protect me.

I learnt that my memory was faulty and could not provide a reliable defense against the fatal first drink. The reasons were still applicable. I just lacked the power to benefit from them. The problem was solved when I began to seek a greater power. After that, the memory was not needed, it just never occurred to me to drink.
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Old 09-13-2017, 03:29 AM
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It's simply not what I do anymore.
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Old 09-13-2017, 04:07 AM
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All of the reasons listed above and more.
What helps me the most is to remember who I was/am without alcohol and move towards the positive and remind myself of all of the fascinating and interesting people in the world who are even more fascinating now because they no longer drink.
I want to have a say in how my loved ones perceive me and look at me and I know that if I drink they will only look at me one way ever and they are too important to allow that to happen ever again.

I am no expert by any manner of means but all the good advice from people here saying that it will get better and to stay strong is the best stuff to take to heart.

Wishing you well getting through today, keep strong!
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Old 09-13-2017, 04:45 AM
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Because I want to live a new life.

Alcohol literally and figuratively held me down. The early days are hard. No doubt about it; I had all the thoughts you're having. But it will get better, the fog will lift, and you will begin to see how you can begin to change.

Remember that last line thought: you can begin to change. It takes work, and you do have to change your life. However, it's very much worth it to do so.
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Old 09-13-2017, 05:10 AM
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My reasons to quit

  • Fear of further liver damage
  • I gained 35kg of weight. Couldn't even tie my own shoes - was asking my wife to do it for me sometimes.
  • Fear of early death
  • Feeling sick every single day
  • Do not remember half of my life
  • Hangovers
  • Couldn't work really - drinking at work.
  • Want to get my life back.
  • I wasn't a real person anymore. Wasn't doing anything else other than drinking. I was not able to complete simple chores like setting up the washing machine.
  • This list can go on forever.

Since I stopped, my health improved dramatically. People that I work with that didn't know I had this issue are saying that I look really well lately. Lost some weight. I got my life back and I will never go back to drinking(I hope!). The best thing I did in my life was to quit.

Just do it. Ignore that voice telling you that you overreacted - it's the addiction talking, not you. One step at a time.
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Old 09-13-2017, 06:05 AM
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Originally Posted by Gottalife View Post
I had all those reasons when I was drinking, except for the junk food thing. Eating interfered with my drinking, so I didn't eat.

The thing is I had all those reasons clearly in mind in the morning as very good reasons why I was not going to drink that day.

But by that afternoon, I had changed my mind. The memory of the misery was all but gone, and the previous dramas did not flood into my mind to protect me.

I learnt that my memory was faulty and could not provide a reliable defense against the fatal first drink. The reasons were still applicable. I just lacked the power to benefit from them. The problem was solved when I began to seek a greater power. After that, the memory was not needed, it just never occurred to me to drink.
Boy, is this true:

"But by that afternoon, I had changed my mind. The memory of the misery was all but gone, and the previous dramas did not flood into my mind to protect me."

Hence, the reason I need to write out the reasons I forget about.

Thanks!
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Old 09-13-2017, 07:04 AM
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The utter despair and sadness I feel after a binge. Can’t stop crying for days until I drink again, starting the cycle all over again.

The restless sleep and nightmares for 3-4 nights after my binge.

Having to check all my methods of messaging to see who I talked to the night before and what I said.

The calories from the booze and crappy food I eat while drunk and the few days of being hungover. My diet suffers for days.

Dehydration. Dry scaly hands.

Yet my skin is still breaking out.

Laziness.

Shame.


All of these symptoms will disappear with sobriety.

It's going to take some time, but if you stay sober now, you will give yourself the best Christmas gift ever!

And imagine what starting 2018 will feel like with 110 more days (counting from today) of sobriety under your belt.

Instead of viewing the reasons to quit which produces a negative list, how about making a list of the reasons to get sober which will be a positive list?
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Old 09-13-2017, 07:07 AM
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Originally Posted by berryblue View Post

Hence, the reason I need to write out the reasons I forget about.
it would be very wise to look into a recovery program to implement into your life so you can be IN recovery.
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Old 09-13-2017, 08:39 AM
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What are your reasons for not drinking?

I've done all I need to prove to myself that I can't drink. The end result will be devastating, maybe not right away, maybe not the 3rd or 4th time, maybe not even the 5th. It doesn't matter. So my reason is this:

I am no longer willing to pay the consequences from my actions when drinking. It's no longer worth it.

My head no longer even entertains the thought of drinking nor does it try to feed me any excuses. Point blank, there are none and yes, although what you might have to endure feeling wise is hard but it really is that simple.

I've made up my mind and that's it. My signature line will be true every single day for the rest of my life.
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Old 09-13-2017, 08:42 AM
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I experience all of the emotions that you are feeling. It's terrible. The answer is not at the bottom of the bottle.
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Old 09-13-2017, 12:07 PM
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What are my reasons for not drinking? You could ask me that question 10 times and I could give you 10 different answers. But primarily I knew what my drinking life was giving me (nothing), even an idiot could deduce that I better try something different. The other thing is that I wanted some self respect back. So far so good.
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