Quack!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,618
Quack!
For anyone who has been following my saga:
Just got email from ex about failing the SoberLink breathalyzer test last week. It is, of course, not his fault. He failed the breathalyzer because he was using mouthwash which contained alcohol. SoberLink specifically states that mouthwash won't produce a positive results on retest, but in his case it's different because this is special prescription mouthwash that you have to hold in your mouth for five minutes without swallowing. Is that even physically possible?
(And of course the obligatory guilt trip - "don't punish Kid because you're angry at me - she wants and needs her time with her father".
So I can add "magical mouthwash" to the list of strange things that ex has brought into my life ...
Just got email from ex about failing the SoberLink breathalyzer test last week. It is, of course, not his fault. He failed the breathalyzer because he was using mouthwash which contained alcohol. SoberLink specifically states that mouthwash won't produce a positive results on retest, but in his case it's different because this is special prescription mouthwash that you have to hold in your mouth for five minutes without swallowing. Is that even physically possible?
(And of course the obligatory guilt trip - "don't punish Kid because you're angry at me - she wants and needs her time with her father".
So I can add "magical mouthwash" to the list of strange things that ex has brought into my life ...
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,144
Sasha, have you ever tried to hold water in your mouth for five minutes? I haven't but it's impossible. Gargle, but not for five minutes, and spit. If he has a new prescription wait and see if he produces that prescription if he doesn't it's just a quack.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
man he's special..........he's like the most special of them all. took him four days and this was the best he could come up with. to match the bruise on his hand that prevented him from showing up in court, because everyone knows you must lie completely inert for DAYS if you injure your hand in anyway.....................
what a freakshow.........
what a freakshow.........
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,618
I contacted the director of operations at SoberLink and he said that he has never heard of anyone testing positive from absorbing mouthwash through the skin of the mouth. Some mouthwashes can give an initial positive test, but retesting in 15 minutes will clear it. And ex retested positive four times.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 10,944
Out of curiosity, I read the Soberlink training manual one evening. It was available on line with video on YouTube. If a false positive occurs, there are specific steps you are to take like rinsing your mouth out with water, waiting a certain amount of time, etc. If he took a total of 4 tests, each 15 minutes apart, that would have been 45 minutes to an hour overall. There is no mouthwash on earth that would do that....again, unless he drank quite a bit of the mouthwash.
What a sad, ill man.
What a sad, ill man.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Let's face it--this is a guy who thinks the rules don't apply to him. He thinks he can game Soberlink, he thinks he can guilt you into letting it pass.
Back when I was drinking I KNOW I deluded myself about what other people were able to observe about my state of (non) sobriety. I get the feeling that's what he's doing--he's just pretending none of his drinking behavior will have any negative consequences. It would be pretty hysterical if it weren't for your poor kiddo. I think it's good, though, that she sees you aren't just imagining his drinking. This is pretty hard proof.
As for why he can't "control" it when he needs to, that's pretty much the nature of alcoholism. I could "control" it to some extent when I had to, but not to the point of not drinking at all. And I couldn't even control it to that extent reliably or over the long term. All I can say is when you're in the middle of it, you keep thinking you ARE and you CAN control it. Like I said, there's a lot of delusion involved.
Back when I was drinking I KNOW I deluded myself about what other people were able to observe about my state of (non) sobriety. I get the feeling that's what he's doing--he's just pretending none of his drinking behavior will have any negative consequences. It would be pretty hysterical if it weren't for your poor kiddo. I think it's good, though, that she sees you aren't just imagining his drinking. This is pretty hard proof.
As for why he can't "control" it when he needs to, that's pretty much the nature of alcoholism. I could "control" it to some extent when I had to, but not to the point of not drinking at all. And I couldn't even control it to that extent reliably or over the long term. All I can say is when you're in the middle of it, you keep thinking you ARE and you CAN control it. Like I said, there's a lot of delusion involved.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,235
The ten-year-old in me was going to suggest to you that you make up a name of mouthwash, say FoofaLaffa, and say "Oh FoofaLaffa mouthwash is the worst! Don't you just hate it when..." just like those comedians that choose to engage with Nigerian Prince scammers.
But the adult in me realizes that this is a very bad idea.
So I googled "prescription mouthwash five minutes" for kicks (I'm actually massively procrastinating) and I haven't found anything yet.
But the adult in me realizes that this is a very bad idea.
So I googled "prescription mouthwash five minutes" for kicks (I'm actually massively procrastinating) and I haven't found anything yet.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 1,618
... but this was special prescription mouthwash, prescribed by his dentist! (Is it even possible to gargle for five minutes straight? Don't try this at home, kids).
It is kind of amazing. He's not dumb. He knows I'm not dumb. Yet he thinks I will believe this because ...? (Because he's delusional).
A friend pointed out that when drug and alcohol testing is used in other circumstances (athletics, workplace, police, etc), there's no allowance made for "not my fault because reasons". In sports, you're responsible for the results of your random tests - if they're positive, you're out, no matter what story you might have for why you're positive for cocaine/artificial steroids/booze etc. Same with workplace testing. And the stakes with Kid's safety are arguably higher. (And this was not a random test - he knew that he would be blowing just before I brought Kid to his place at a prearranged time. So it's not even like "surprise!").
It would be funny if it didn't really, really suck. From Kid's perspective, she's losing time with her father, who she rarely sees to begin with. Within a year she's gone from living with him every other week to now being allowed to see him for half an hour in a public place under supervision. From her perspective, it's me that's carried all this out, because her father won't ever acknowledge that he has screwed up. I would have more respect for him if he would say "I %$!#@ed up, I relapsed/can't stop drinking, so it's best if Kid stays with you until I get better". But that's not going to happen.
(And the guilt trip: "don't punish Kid just because you're angry with me". Because this is all my doing. Because I MADE him drink or whatever, and so the consequences of his actions are actually me choosing to act punitively).
It is kind of amazing. He's not dumb. He knows I'm not dumb. Yet he thinks I will believe this because ...? (Because he's delusional).
A friend pointed out that when drug and alcohol testing is used in other circumstances (athletics, workplace, police, etc), there's no allowance made for "not my fault because reasons". In sports, you're responsible for the results of your random tests - if they're positive, you're out, no matter what story you might have for why you're positive for cocaine/artificial steroids/booze etc. Same with workplace testing. And the stakes with Kid's safety are arguably higher. (And this was not a random test - he knew that he would be blowing just before I brought Kid to his place at a prearranged time. So it's not even like "surprise!").
It would be funny if it didn't really, really suck. From Kid's perspective, she's losing time with her father, who she rarely sees to begin with. Within a year she's gone from living with him every other week to now being allowed to see him for half an hour in a public place under supervision. From her perspective, it's me that's carried all this out, because her father won't ever acknowledge that he has screwed up. I would have more respect for him if he would say "I %$!#@ed up, I relapsed/can't stop drinking, so it's best if Kid stays with you until I get better". But that's not going to happen.
(And the guilt trip: "don't punish Kid just because you're angry with me". Because this is all my doing. Because I MADE him drink or whatever, and so the consequences of his actions are actually me choosing to act punitively).
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
