Sdjfam

I feel so hopeless.
I can't even make it to 10 days.
Today work stress got the best of me (AGAIN)
Left to get 2 bottles of wine.
Drank 1 before work.
Drank one during work in a travel mug.
I hate my life. Why can't I stop? My husband knew the second I got home and won't speak to me. I'm pretty sure this is the last straw. Fml ...

how do I stop letting my job and crazy boss get to me???

AnvilheadII

choose to find more meaningful ways to deal with work besides drinking. and ask yourself, is work REALLY the problem? is drinking before work and AT work in any way HELPING the situation?

D122y

sdj,

It is addiction. Physical and mental. Some folks can know this and stop. Some can't.

Have you seen a dr.? They can offer you meds that ease the transition from physical and mental addiction to a better state.

Thanks.

LesPaul1993

Some jobs and some bosses are crazy. Is the current one so crazy that you'd be better off taking a job somewhere else?

Plan how you'll do things differently the next time something similar occurs. Think of alternative coping skills. Some people slip away for a few minutes of meditation. Some people take a walk. Some have a close network of supports they can confide in and in turn be confided in when things like this come up.

Some bosses may have poor boundaries and bend your ear with their own stresses and issues in addition to job related ones. Is it possible to distance yourself from the delivery of the message and the extraneous data, and just identify the assignment, complete it, and then reward yourself later with something of equivalent value to two bottles of wine?

Just some thoughts. Consider what opportunities there may be where you live to get coaching/therapy regarding development of healthy coping skills. How do other addicts handle similar situation? Are there meetings that could be supportive in this regard?

A slip, is just a slip, until it becomes a stumbling block to even trying again. Don't let it trip you up. Get back at it and tackle the situation in a new, creative way!

Poppy79

I totally get where you are at right now. That was me last November.
I had to go to inpatient treatment to kick start my sobriety. Best thing I ever did.
I hope you find a way to stop xx

Purplrks3647

Can you find another job? I know my last job drove me absolutely insane......

I had a hard time getting past 3 to 4 days at first. Stay close to SR....the support here is amazing.....please don't give up!

Sdjfam

I honestly don't think so. I probably have the highest paying and most reliable job in my field. And I support my family. I'm really unsure of my future at this point

MariahGayle

Just keep at it sd. so much good to be found in sobriety, you deserve it for yourself

Dee74

Hi sdjfam

If there's one thing I've learned it's that you can be stressed out, annoyed, scared, bored, angry...and not drink on it.

Next time you have a rough day, try your hardest not to drink. Log in here instead try some meditation, or exercise, do some deep breathing...

You could even even use any of the real life meeting based places for help like AA SMART or lifering etc.

Once you learn that there are other ways to deal with things, and that these feelings, although unpleasant, will pass without you drinking - it gets a lot easier trust me


D

hellrzr

Start working the program of AA with a sponsor and you'll be amazed at how much better your will seem and how much the rest of your life will improve.

Delilah1

Some good advice above, definitely log on here if the thought of drinking crosses your mind, someone will help talk you out of it.

Sounds like you are quite successful at work, maybe you can find a job similar in salary that would also allow you to be happy to show up each day.

noturningback2

I really think looking at 'urge surfing' would be a good move for you in these situations. Its a tough situation, you are stressed so you drink, but drinking before work and during, enough your husband can tell...the reality is that you wont have that job much longer. But without that work stress, there will be another new stress that presents itself. My point is, there is always stress, always something that takes over our mind and makes us edgy, but you need to learn to manage it without turning to alcohol.

Alcohol doesn't make it better, it doesn't make the stress disappear as we trick ourselves into thinking it does, it makes it even more stressful. So now on top of the stressful day, you and your husband aren't speaking, when you probably would have loved to have got home, made a hot drink, let him comfort you and discuss the s**t day you had. I really hope I don't sound harsh, believe me I know how hard it is to change that mindset, it is NOT easy. But stress CAN be managed differently. Urge surfing has been quite insightful to me, and is so far in 13 days, been successful. I really suggest along with all the advice previously given, you look into it. There is a sticky on it in this forum. Its a great tool when you learn to use it! Best of luck

August252015

Ditto what Dee said, in particular. We have to choose NOT to drink, no matter WHAT. That seems impossible at first, to most of us, but it is not just possible, it can be done every day.

I had to get to a point where I faced a certain death by drinking or an uncertain future in sobriety and thank God every day I chose life.

I am a dedicated AA-er and it is now my worldview, my rock, my source of how to live, in conjunction with my faith. Others choose different paths, but the key is ACTION. A program that teaches you how to live sober, then to live fully- what to DO when stress comes up (as it inevitably will) and how to have a REAL life that you participate in, can effect and can definitely enjoy.

Hope to see you around- perhaps look at the Newcomers Daily Support Thread for the Class of Aug 2017, and the 24 hour thread that many find helpful.

My life was truly desperate and I was finally DONE with drinking. I can tell you now that every. single. thing. is better sober. Take care- don't drink today.

PhoenixJ

how? drinking certainly will make it worse. to stop- be honest and get help. doc, counselling, aa. empathy and support to you.

Della1968

I lost a job that was all of those things by drinking at work. It will progress to the point where you will lose this job. I think whether you stay at this job or not you have to address the drinking and learn some new coping skills or the addiction will follow you to any job. There is always stress with any job. Good luck!!

BrandNewLife

It seems impossible to get through the days without alcohol because that's what an addictive substance will do to you. We turn to alcohol because it WORKS to numb us out and shut down those feelings of discomfort.

The problem is, it creates a vacuum... sucking out your soul and sanity with it. The anxiety you feel around not drinking, is created around the vicious cycle of being dependent on drink.

Especially if you're in a position of having a high paying job and supporting your family, you're playing with fire. You know this. If's only a matter of time before it'll come crashing down if you don't stop.

I've found reading This Naked Mind by Annie Grace a good way to change my thinking around alcohol.

Maudcat

Oh, boy.
Drinking at work is a recipe for a train wreck.
I get where you are coming from, I do.
But, seriously, don't drink at work.

Dee74

Hows it going sjdfam?

D

tomsteve

theres a few things i can think of that would help.
first is to realize that getting drunk isnt helping. in fact, it reads like its making everything worse.
then surrender- admit alcohol has ya whipped.
then WANT to be sober.
then decided you are willing to go to ANY lengths for victory over alcohol.
then get into action. there are many recvoery programs available and even rehab. please dont be someone who says rehab isnt an option. theres a few people stuck in the throws of alcoholism because of that.

nothing change if nothing changes. so PLEASE get into action.

youre drinking before work. idk about the company ya work for, but drinking on the job or showing up drunk are grounds for termination.

you are NOT hopeless. you are sick.
and there IS a solution IF youre willing to go to ANY lengths.

tomsteve

there is something you can be sure of:
if things dont change, its gonna get worse.
AA has been a lifesaver for me. actually, thats a lie- i didnt have a life. i was just existing.
it gave me a life i could have never dreamed of and taught me how to live life on lifes terms.
i once felt ans though i was a hopeless,helpless,useless,worthless POS.

today i have hope, use, worth, and can help.
with the added benefit of having not drank in a few 24's