Mummyto2

Staying here until the little devil on my shoulder buggers off and stops trying to drag me back to hell

BixBees505

Good. Welcome. Keep posting.

Forward12

Well done, posting before you do something stupid is always the best plan of action!

Verdantia

Hey, Mum. Good on you for sticking here--keep posting. It is true for me too that just one drink will drag me back to hell. We need never suffer the shame and agony again. Wishing you great strength today-quitting drink was the hardest thing I have ever done, but the most worthwhile.

Mummyto2

Thanks, decided to read Bills story in my aa book

Opivotal

That's the way to take action, Mummyto2! I'm glad you came here for support. Remember, you don't have to act on those thoughts.

When you take drinking off the table that voice in your head means nothing. You have all the power now!

Hang in there, it gets better.

MidnightRider

great to see you posting!
Show AV who's boss.

Remember HALT
Are you Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired?

tealily

It sounds like you had such a wonderful day yesterday with you son and daughter! Playing a game with your sweet son, and having a teen daughter ask you to ride bikes. They clearly are trying to connect and probably even help you. Don't lose that opportunity! You are so fortunate.

I could feel through your words how delighted, happy and proud they were, to have you present and how much they love you.

Drinking won't help you in any way. And it absolutely will hurt them. Good for you for posting when you were tempted. That AV is a liar. Push through and past it.

It will be so worth it.

These moments with your kids will never come again. And you deserve a fuller life.

Hang in there! Keep posting.

Mummyto2

Thank you, think because I am exhausted my brain and thought pattern aren't right

PhoenixJ

Berrybean

Maybe listen to a couple of AA speakers.
Loads on here.... https://www.recoveryaudio.org/

Hope that AV of yours goes for a nap soon x

Taevans64

Love your attitude!

Mummyto2

Thanks, shops all closed here now thank god, I am not giving in to this again, this is one fight I will win, when it happens again I will jus try and remember the wanting will pass

BixBees505

BerryB...thx for link to speakers. Listening now. And thank to Mummy for this good thread.

SimplyFree

Nice job fighting back. As the days pass it does get easier. Hang on you won't regret it!

tomsteve

i cant say how many times i read bills story before anything started sinking in. i was in quite a fog, would read a few pages, then have to turn back because i had no idea what i had just read.
the 1st few lines that sunk in first:
"No words can tell of the loneliness and despair I found in that bitter morass of self-pity. Quicksand stretched around me in all directions. I had met my match. I had been overwhelmed. Alcohol was my master."

THAT hit me in the heart and knew how that felt.

then these lines hit me shortly after:
"My friend suggested what then seemed a novel idea. He said, "Why don't you choose your own conception of God?"

That statement hit me hard. It melted the icy intellectual mountain in whose shadow I had lived and shivered many years. I stood in the sunlight at last.

It was only a matter of being willing to believe in a Power greater than myself. Nothing more was required of me to make my beginning. I saw that growth could start from that point. Upon a foundation of complete willingness I might build what I saw in my friend. Would I have it? Of course I would!"

Mummyto2

Thanks Berry B fab listening

PhoenixJ