Newlife17

Had a pleasant morning celebrating the holiday. As I sit here filling out some information my lawyer needs, I am wondering: is it normal or common for someone with an addiction to refer to their child as their best friend? My AH refers to our child as his, as the person he most likes to spend time with. That used to be me, but not now... since I am "always" ruining any time we have by making him not feel good enough or harping about what I think he needs to do to make our marriage salvageable (get sober and into major therapy and recovery program). Yes- I know. Nothing I say or don't say will help him as he just refuses and keeps lying to me, blaming me.
But wondering if this is a common thing. It just doesn't seem normal to me. Btw he used to say his parents were his best friends and they would say the same thing about him (they are both children of alcoholic fathers).

JK130

Hi There! I like your username "NewLife"! Yes! Your question about bffs...I guess whoever you feel closest to is the one who you describe as your best friend. I can understand his thinking because drinking can be extremely isolating and lonely. It could be a lot of pressure to put on a child or teen tho depending on how your AH handles it and the age of the child. How are you doing?

LexieCat

A lot of alcoholics have blown through anyone else who might qualify for "friend" status--if he's thinking in terms of people who still love him or are glad to see him no matter how effed up his life has become, then yeah--people like mom and dad and kids are about all that's left.

Westexy

Great question. I don't know if this is common but it was the case with my STBXAH. At the peak of our family crisis, he bragged about being "best friends" with our young son and his friends. Like Lexie said, that was because he had no one left so he was "friends" with children who couldn't really tell that he was drunk.