One month!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2017
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 21
One month!
Hi everyone, just wanted to write a quick update that I've made it a month sober! I wanted to say thank you, I wouldn't have been able to do it without checking in on here every day and reading all of your stories and advice. Thank you for everything you do.
For the most part the month has been great! I must admit feeling 'left out' from time to time but those moments pass pretty quickly. One issue I was wondering if anyone has any advice on is dealing with other people who are drinking. I find tipsy people (family included) very challenging to be around now and annoying, frankly. That also makes me feel guilty because when I used to drink I got a lot more than tipsy and it's embarrassing to think about how much I must have annoyed people myself. Any advice on how to cope?
Thanks again all - you're the best
For the most part the month has been great! I must admit feeling 'left out' from time to time but those moments pass pretty quickly. One issue I was wondering if anyone has any advice on is dealing with other people who are drinking. I find tipsy people (family included) very challenging to be around now and annoying, frankly. That also makes me feel guilty because when I used to drink I got a lot more than tipsy and it's embarrassing to think about how much I must have annoyed people myself. Any advice on how to cope?
Thanks again all - you're the best
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: London
Posts: 2,040
Hi djm527,
Congrats on a month 🎉🎉🎉 I must be coming up to that milestone as well soon! I had a family day out last week and my relatives drank cocktails all day. My mum got herself into quite a state and it was very interesting to watch the various stages of her drunkenness which included a belligerent and obnoxious stage and also a really annoying attention seeking stage. It felt uncomfortable to think that I would have also have had my various stages of drunkenness when I drank and how others would have found it!!!!! I would have liked to have left when it reached a certain stage but I didn't want to leave my sister to deal with our Mother on her own. It's a difficult one and I think I am going to have to talk to my sister and devise a plan with her ahead of time about calling it a day when our Mother reaches a certain stage of drunkenness so that we don't have to endure it.
Anyway...congratulations again. Wishing you well on the rest of your recovery journey x
Congrats on a month 🎉🎉🎉 I must be coming up to that milestone as well soon! I had a family day out last week and my relatives drank cocktails all day. My mum got herself into quite a state and it was very interesting to watch the various stages of her drunkenness which included a belligerent and obnoxious stage and also a really annoying attention seeking stage. It felt uncomfortable to think that I would have also have had my various stages of drunkenness when I drank and how others would have found it!!!!! I would have liked to have left when it reached a certain stage but I didn't want to leave my sister to deal with our Mother on her own. It's a difficult one and I think I am going to have to talk to my sister and devise a plan with her ahead of time about calling it a day when our Mother reaches a certain stage of drunkenness so that we don't have to endure it.
Anyway...congratulations again. Wishing you well on the rest of your recovery journey x
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,359
Hi and congrats on a month djm
It might seem extreme but I simply removed myself from being around alcohol or drinkers for a while..until I knew I preferred begin sober no matter what.
Thats not to say I stayed at home and saw noone - but I started light and worked up - I made coffee dates, movie dates, pizza dates...anything that didn't need alcohol as an accompaniment.
By the time I did get into full socialising again, I'd fully built up my 'sober muscles'.
I consider the few months that took to be a great investment in my recovery
It might seem extreme but I simply removed myself from being around alcohol or drinkers for a while..until I knew I preferred begin sober no matter what.
Thats not to say I stayed at home and saw noone - but I started light and worked up - I made coffee dates, movie dates, pizza dates...anything that didn't need alcohol as an accompaniment.
By the time I did get into full socialising again, I'd fully built up my 'sober muscles'.
I consider the few months that took to be a great investment in my recovery
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Djm,
No advice, but in myexperience...
Generally, my drunk family has sort of stopped drinking hard around me.
I told them a bit about what i believe about booze and it sort of backfired.
I only told them because i love them.
They have made it into a...we can't drink around him....thing.
Whatever...i reminded them that if i wanted to drink i would...drinking around me is ok.
They haven't ever been normally rude and generally i was the hardest drinker of them all.
We here know that sobriety is the answer.
Thanks.
No advice, but in myexperience...
Generally, my drunk family has sort of stopped drinking hard around me.
I told them a bit about what i believe about booze and it sort of backfired.
I only told them because i love them.
They have made it into a...we can't drink around him....thing.
Whatever...i reminded them that if i wanted to drink i would...drinking around me is ok.
They haven't ever been normally rude and generally i was the hardest drinker of them all.
We here know that sobriety is the answer.
Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 101
Congrats on one month!
Always driving yourself somewhere is a good practice.
I have rules for booze in my house now. Guests and family can bring it, but I ask them to keep it out of site (different fridge/cooler, opaque glasses, coozies, etc., and to always take it back home). That's a work in progress...
As far as going out, that hasn't been too much trouble so far. I was the heavy drinker in my group, and my friends who know I'm sober are pretty cool with the whole bro code about it.
Always driving yourself somewhere is a good practice.
I have rules for booze in my house now. Guests and family can bring it, but I ask them to keep it out of site (different fridge/cooler, opaque glasses, coozies, etc., and to always take it back home). That's a work in progress...
As far as going out, that hasn't been too much trouble so far. I was the heavy drinker in my group, and my friends who know I'm sober are pretty cool with the whole bro code about it.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,109
I limit my exposure to drinking environments. I leave whenever I feel ready, I find it helpful to always have an escape plan for when I find my tolerance for those situations had been reached. If it's an event where the sole focus is going to be sitting around drinking I don't go. This weekend my bf and I are having friends up to our boat who really like to party and I already have a plan to go to a friends house to crash who lives nearby when I've had enough of everyone drinking around me. I'm learning to adapt as a sober person in a world full of drinkers. I've changed but the people in my life have not so I've got to figure out how to navigate those relationships and set new boundaries for myself.
Congrats on a month!
Congrats on a month!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,036
Congratulations on your first of many sober months!!!
As for drunk/tipsy people I tended to avaoid them for a while. The hardest was my husband because he still drinks beer every night, and in the beginning I found myself settling into a different room because I didn't want to be around alcohol. It does get easier, but I still get annoyed with his drinking from time to time.
As for drunk/tipsy people I tended to avaoid them for a while. The hardest was my husband because he still drinks beer every night, and in the beginning I found myself settling into a different room because I didn't want to be around alcohol. It does get easier, but I still get annoyed with his drinking from time to time.
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