Ilovemysonjj

Hello SR family! I haven't shared any updates lately cuz its either a "Everything is Fabulous" or "Here we go again" repeat of all of the posts I've ever written. I wanted to now start this thread about ME!

I have been praying and coming closer to God lately and I am overwhelmed with a feeling of gratitude and joy regardless of what JJ is doing. Recently JJ had another setback, but thank the Lord kept me out of it. He is back in detox. I started worrying and fretting (typical Captain Codie) and then realized that JJ is in the desert, walking HIS walk just like Jesus did. Jesus was tempted and had to stand in his faith and state "get thee behind me Satan!". It was then I realized I too must state that to the evil voice in my head that puts the burden of my sons addiction and outcomes that I am supposed to control. I hope I am articulating this because I truly feel I found a key to peace. That voice (codie ) is an evil spirit that is taking my soul. It takes all of my faith in God away. If I listen to that voice, it is me turning away from God. It is me saying I am greater than God. It is me denying my God.
WOW!!!!!!! I never realized that the unbelief that comes when you deny God is tied to the codependency. I pray that we all continue to see our glorious God in the day to day walk we all must do. Whether you are still in the battle or celebrating recovery with your loved one, take heed in the power of your God! I do not consider myself religious, but spiritual. I thank God that this battle is not mine and that I continue to see Him in every aspect of my life.

I also have started eating Vegan 3 days per week and wow the energy is so amazing! I am bouncing off my chair Now I also enjoy a good steak or fish (or carne asada burrito) on my off days, but the plant based diet stuff really does work in terms of the energy it gives.

Thank you all for the continued support and prayers!
Love to all.
TT

atalose

It's good to see you are in a peaceful place with yourself! So nice!

hopeful4

Good to hear you are taking good care of YOU!!!

AnvilheadII

really good to hear you talk about............YOU!

Ann

Yes. ^^^ This IS recovery!! Well done.

You may or may not practice the 12-step program, it's a personal choice and either way is okay...but you just aced Steps 2 and 3, whether you know it or not. It may sound like no big deal but I can tell you first hand, these are the most difficult steps of all to understand, believe and embrace.

Step 2: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Step 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

Once I stopped being mad at God and asked him to come into my life, my burdon was lifted and my life changed forever. All I had to do was ask...and believe...and maintain my faith.

JJ is in my daily prayers, along with all our lost children here. Like my own son, God will do for JJ what you and I cannot. Trust that.

Hugs

Anaya

Thanks for sharing your good news. Praying for peace and goodness for you.

Through struggling, seeking answers, and then (eventually) understanding, letting God into my heart has brought about peace and hope for me as well.

Ilovemysonjj

Thank you everyone for the love! I am happy as ever. JJ is also okay (God has him close at heart). On another note, my other son is graduating college on Saturday and my daughter just got certified as a CNA! She is only 20 and has plans to be an RN so the CNA is a stepping stone for her to get her feet wet while she finishes college. I feel that all three of my kids are walking their path. JJ chose and handled his own release from detox (Momma stayed out LOL). JJ is making the choice to go back to Freedom Ranch. He found his peace and joy there and I believe that is where God has led him.

Love you all and enjoy your weekend, I know I will!

allthatsgood

Such a wonderful post to read! Your recovery is shining through and is an inspiration. God bless you and your family.

Twofour

T, it has been a while for me to post , but I am so proud to read this post from you.............You sound so at peace and I admire your story and love your words you can hear that you are really working the program...