sobergirl33

Hi everyone I'm new here. I'm 24 years old, female and have been drinking heavily for the past 5 years. At this point it is out of control and I need to find some type of support. I drink alone a lot, and have been avoiding social activities because I'm either trying not to drink or drinking and just want to stay at home. I'm skeptical of AA because I'm not religious so I'm hoping to find some way to stop without going to meetings. Alcohol has destroyed my life over the past year. It has led me to binge eat and gain 30 lbs. I feel so bad everyday when I wake up. I literally don't want to wake up so I try to sleep longer. Ugh. During the past few years I've given up alcohol for brief periods of time (max 3 months) and I felt so much better and lost weight. Alcohol makes me look and feel like complete crap. Thanks for reading and I'm hoping this forum will help me with my issues.

Hevyn

Welcome Tglanon! I'm so glad you found us. SR helped me find the courage to change my life. It's so good to no longer feel alone.

I'd give anything to go back and be 24 again - and do what you're doing. I was never honest with myself - kept trying to control what I drank. As a result I kept going with it for decades - ruining my life in the process. Be glad you're seeing what needs to be done.

nova84

Welcome to SR Tglanon,

I am completing something called The 30-Day Sobriety Programme...I have the audio book and there's a companion website. Each day there is a chapter and action steps to complete. I am 7 days in and am finding it really helpful in focusing on thriving in sobriety and taking action every day to achieve this. Have a look online if you think it could work for you.

Wishing you well on the rest of your recovery journey x

earlyriser

Hi Tglanon - you've made a great start coming here. I'm sure others will chime in soon enough to ditto that. There are lots of great tools here. I suggest reading all the 'stickys' and visit and post often.

As for AA - I am not religious either, but I have attended for the duration of my current sobriety, and the fellowship has been invaluable. I take what I can use, and I also supplemented early on with a lot of non-AA resources, including this site.

I wish you well, and hope you get sober at this young age. Many of us regret the wasted years spent drinking and wishing we could be free of it. I hope you can avoid that regret.

least

Welcome to the family. You are wise to get sober while you're still young. You'll have fewer regrets when you get to be my age if you live a sober life.

Ananda

The book suggested sounds good!

Also you might check out in secular cause it has some other programs for sobriety you might feel more compatible with.

I do attend AA, but it is only one of the 4 legs of my sobriety. Counseling, Buddhism, and SR are all more important for me. But AA can really help to meet other sober people face to face.

Stick around and you will find the sober path that works for you if you look for it!

Welcome!

sobergirl33

Thank you everyone for your replies! Also thank you so much nova84 I just purchased the book you suggested. Do you think there any possible way this could guide me to be able to drink in moderation? I know alcohol is a poison but to stop forever is scary right now..especially because all my friends drink and go out out every weekend

time2shineagain

With regards to the question on moderation/abstinence; I'm not sure if anyone can answer that question for you. Only you know whether or not you're able to moderate. It is my personal opinion that an alcoholic can not moderate and should therefore abstain from alcohol completely. I'm only roughly 10 years older than you and I understand what you mean about 'forever' feeling really scary. It is a really scary thought. The way I'm handling this is to take it ONE day at a time. I know I need to give sobriety a good go. I don't know if there's a place for alcohol in my life in the future and I fear that letting my guard down and allowing for one little drink will be the start of a terrible battle with booze again. So right at this moment, 8 days into sobriety, I'm taking it one day at a time. Baby steps. Today I WILL NOT drink.

Wishing you well with your recovery.

Thank you for the book suggestion Nova, I'll check it out too!

JoeCree

"I wish i never touched the stuff"... is something you will never have to say in the future. You are young and have a full life in front of you. Although you are feeling down, your decision to come here at 24yo shows how smart you really are. You have a chance to change your life for the best. Many of us (elders) must live with the myriad mistakes and horrible memories we've done while drunk; marriages, children, jobs lost and financial ruin.
Glad you can join us.
Also, please check in with your doctor too. Many of us suffer from depression/anxiety and was a major contributor to self medicating with alcohol. If this is something you suffer from, there are very good treatments available to you.

PhoenixJ

welcome

Mattq2

What joecree said!!! We are here for you TG. You can beat it early

Dee74

Hi and welcome tglanon

I can share my experience in the hope it helps.

I spent a lot of years - decades really - trying to learn how to moderate.

The problem was I'd NEVER been a moderate drinker.

Drinking was always about getting wasted for me - I craved oblivion.

I also ended up drinking alone - I preferred it that way - I could get as shambolically mind alteringly drunk as I liked.

Guys like me cant moderate because I wasn't born with that setting.

Not drinking is scary to guys like us - but please don't let that put you off.

I bless the day my body and mind said enough and I had to choose to drink and die or live.

I chose life - and life sober is awesome

I got sober back in 07 and I'm still having the time of my life - honestly

why not give it a go?

D

tufty13

Hi Tglanon,

Welcome to SR, this is great place to come for support and to learn.

Boy oh boy, do I wish I'd been as smart as you when I was 24, that way I wouldn't have wasted the best part of 30 years trying to understand why I couldn't get my life together.

You won't need to try and moderate once you get a taste for the freedom long term sobriety offers. It's an absolute myth that you have to drink to fit it, or have fun or, or anything really. It's a health stealer, a time stealer, a life stealer. Don't waste any of your precious youth experimenting with moderation. It doesn't work, it can't work, it's never worked.

Good luck on your sober journey. :-)

HTown

Moderation is a dead end. I know it sounds scary to think "you will never drink again", but honestly, you will not miss it. In the end, it adds nothing to your life, but you have to be sober and alcohol free at least 6 months to start seeing that yourself.

Do not go down the road we have already been. Everyone here has been pretty far down that path and every single person says the same thing. Stop now.

sobergirl33

Hi nova I'm not sure if you get a notification if I quote your post but I really want to thank you again for this book recommendation. I'm only on day 2 but I have a really good feeling about it. I have read a lot of sobriety books but this one seems different and more effective. I was going to send you a private message but I have to post 5 times first.

fini

Tglanon, for attempts to moderate, you can check out Moderation Management.

i did check that out, and fell over at the first suggestion, which was to abstain for i think three months, or maybe a month(?) before starting the moderating.

seemed ridiculous to me.........impossible!

welcome, and hope you'll check around here. all kinds of people being sober in all kinds of ways.

CreativeThinker